# real-life use of Simpsons quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 6, 2001, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194 "2001-08-06T22:33:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2001, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/61 "2001-08-12T17:14:58Z")
I can’t believe I forget this one! Look at my profile to see my occupation. I use this character’s quote’s almost daily. ---
**Author:** ![Shawn\_K](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f19dbf/32.png) [@Shawn\_K](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shawn_K)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2001, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/62 "2001-08-12T17:24:57Z")
I am the world’s biggest teenage Simpsons fans. Like, litterally. Over 20 9 hours tapes, I have every single episode. Over the years, my older brother and I have used Simpsons quotes for our conversations, and they seem to change every few months. ## \ Can you get me a glass of coke? \ Can’t you get it yourself? \ Ok, fine…I’ll just let my mouth dry up and dehydrate _cough_cough_wheeze_ ## \ This milk smells off. \ Ha hah! Joke’s on you! I left that carton sitting against the ventiltor for a month! ## \ What’s that? \ It’s ------ \ ------, eh? ## \ Bed goes up, bed goes down, bed goes up, bed goes down. ## \ How can you play videogames, Shawn? \ They’re my only escape from the drudgery of friends and family. No offense. ## \ Hi everybody! \ Hiya, Shawn. \ _grabs them by shirt collar_ I SAID “Hi, everybody!” ## \ I work hard for the money. So hard for the money. Something something money so gimmie lotsa money now. ## \ I want to be loved. \ I see…well, I’m gonna need some beer… ## \ And all I did was put in my name! Thrillhouse… ## \ Once she sees you’ll do anything she wants, she’s bound to respect you. ## \ Guess who likes you? ## \ C’mon, Imran. Time to get up for school. \ No thanks. I got a lot of work to do around the bed. ## \ You know these so-called volunteers don’t even get paid? ## (My mom set this one up and she doesn’t even know it) \ The government only asks for 8 hours a day for school. \ Then they should have made they day 8 hours longer. Lousy government. ## \ There it is, the smartest thing you’ll ever say and no one’s there to hear it. ## (Used when someone’s last name ends with S, like Sanders) \ The Sanderseseseses. ## \ You’ll die up there, just like I did! \ You?! DID?! ## (This I got in trouble for) \*Teacher is writing assignments on the board and keeps stopping and thinking, keeping us from leaving, finally, the third time… \ Don’t make me come up there! Finally (and I’m glad some of you read this far), my favorite: “Kids, you tried, and you failed. The lesson is: Never try.” So true, Homer. So true. Thanks for reading this insanely long post. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8797f3/32.png) [@lel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lel)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2001, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/63 "2001-08-12T21:51:07Z")
There is only quote (aside from the standard D’oh) that I could remember well enough to use. (Although if I messed up a word or two, please let me know.) (Mr. Burns) Let’s blow this fascist popsicle stand. Perfect for leaving anywhere! ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2001, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/64 "2001-08-12T22:02:23Z")
I can’t believe that no one has mentioned yoink yet. I swear to God I yoink something everyday (and I make sure to say yoink, or it doesn’t count.) My college buddies and I always use “\ liek a fox!” We love the less-known Simpsons quotes that only true fans appreciate. ---
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2001, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/65 "2001-08-12T22:45:58Z")
Yoink is a good one. Also throw around “He thinks he’s people.” ---
**Author:** ![Broken\_Doll](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbce88/32.png) [@Broken\_Doll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broken_Doll)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2001, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/66 "2001-08-13T09:51:04Z")
I often say, when injured or sore in a mock Canadian accent “Ooh, that stings, eh?” from the episode where the Simpsons go to Japan. I always say when eating eggs, or just eating anything at all “Mmmm…ovulicious…” When asked a question I don’t know the answer to, I’ll say “I…don’t…know…” from the episode where Homer was pretending to be Mr Burns and didn’t know his name. “I bent my Wookie” I say that when I make a mistake. And finally, when fighting with someone, I’ll say Lisa-style “You’re a baffoon! BAFFOOON!” Jeez, there are so many more that I use. ---
**Author:** ![bwanasimba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/53a042/32.png) [@bwanasimba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bwanasimba)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2001, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/67 "2001-08-13T12:32:15Z")
When Mrs Simba comes to me, frustrated with the latest tantrums from toddler Simba and demanding to know why she is behaving that way - I turn to face our daughter, shrug my shoulders and use my favourite Bart line: “Hey, I’m a kid, that’s my job”. Usually deflates the situation when she slaps her head and says “D’oh!”. ---
**Author:** ![JS\_Princeton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@JS\_Princeton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JS_Princeton)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2001, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/68 "2001-08-13T22:21:21Z")
Person 1 [upon realizing that they aren’t completing their task in a timely manner, are stuck in a boring situation at work/school, watching too much TV, etc.] At this rate I won’t even get into Vassar! Person 2 [irate] I’ve had just aboutenoughofyour Vassar-bashing, young lady! Kills me everytime, especially when it happens in dialogue unplanned. (Once it even happened to me with an acquaintance that I didn’t know very well. What a barrel of laughs that was to us… everyone else though we were the weirdest, though.) ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/69 "2001-08-14T03:09:53Z")
When sudden understanding falls on a co-worker: “It teaches you while you learn.” And since I have a tendency to say things that most normal people with a smidgen of tact never say, I’m forever saying “I said the quiet part loud.” ---
**Author:** ![Rosebud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rosebud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rosebud)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/70 "2001-08-14T04:36:07Z")
Forgot a couple! “I call the big one Bitey,” referring to the younger, yet larger and, hmm, bitey-er of my two ferrets. I’ve also managed to work “embiggens” into a number of conversations; the Simpsons fans get it, the non-fans narrow their eyes at me and say, “That’s not a word… is it?” Sure it is! And learning new words embiggens us all. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/71 "2001-08-14T05:27:50Z")
Once I was dissed by a girl at a party (yeah, once) and she e-mailed me later saying, “I looked for you later on, I couldn’t find you.” I responded, “If I wanted smoke blown up my ass, I’d be at home with a pack of cigarettes and a short length of hose.” When I was in Key West, we toured this awful museum that had a guy outside in a pirate suit talking in bad pirate lingo. We were shooting Old Sea Captain lines back and forth for the rest of the trip: “Yarr, is it more iced tea ye be needin’?” Of course, I throw out Dr. Nick quotes all the time at school, but no one ever seems to get them… Dr. J ---
**Author:** ![Evno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Evno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evno)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/72 "2001-08-14T06:55:45Z")
When I drive, sometimes I sing: "She blinds everybody with her super-high-beams She’s a deer-smakin’, squirrel-smashin’ drivin’ machine CANYON-EROOOOOOOOOO! YAH!" I told my friend’s wife to remember the phrase “purple monkey dishwasher”, or else I would ignore her, and she still remembers it. I laugh like Professor Frink would sometimes… I can’t believe no one here has mentioned **yoink!** , or **meh…**. They both came from the show, and I use them all the time. Ones I’d like to use: FRINK: Now here we have an ordinary square- CHIEF WIGGUM: whoa whoa, slow down, egghead! HOMER: mmmm…incapacitating HOMER: yeah, i’ve got this friend named…Joey-joe-joe…junior…jabadoo? MOE: that’s the worst name I’ve ever heard. (a man cries) BARNEY: Joey-Joe-Joe! HOMER: Marge, where’s that metal dealy…you use to…dig…food… And one that’s too funny to not type here: HOMER: I’D LIKE THE PHONE BOOK FOR HOKKAIDO, JAPAN PLEASE. LIBRARIAN: HERE YOU GO, ONE PHONE BOOK FOR HOKKAIDO, JAPAN. HOMER: THANK YOU. MAY I PLEASE USE YOUR PHONE? LIBRARIAN: I-IS IT A LOCAL CALL? HOMER: YY-YES… ---
**Author:** ![Evno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Evno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evno)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/73 "2001-08-14T06:59:39Z")
looks like someone DID say yoink. Meh. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/74 "2001-08-14T14:32:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rosebud \* > \*\*Forgot a couple! > > “I call the big one Bitey,” referring to the younger, yet larger and, hmm, bitey-er of my two ferrets. I’ve also managed to work “embiggens” into a number of conversations; the Simpsons fans get it, the non-fans narrow their eyes at me and say, “That’s not a word… is it?” > \*\* “It’s a perfectly cromulent word.” Ah, yes, I use meh as well. And when walking into a room, I sometimes yell out, “Hi, everybody!” And when someone I haven’t seen in a while (well, not a long while, a day or two) says hello, I can occasionally be heard saying, “Why if it isn’t Mr.McGregor, with an arm for a leg and a leg for an arm.” ---
**Author:** ![Thrasybulus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Thrasybulus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thrasybulus)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/75 "2001-08-14T18:37:11Z")
I have to say that have found Grandpa Simpson to be a treasure trove of quotes: “The lamp’s running away . . .” “I thought it was because the Democrats were back in power.” “Welcome to my world.” (After Lisa says “You mean we could die in our sleep . . .”) In addition, Nelson’s “Ha-Ha” works well when someone other than you screws up and the following have found their way in to conversations of mine: “Isn’t funny how sometimes two wrongs do make a right?” “You can always depend on the kindness of strangers.” (said singing) “In this house we observe the laws of Thermodynamics.” “France.” (Generally good as an expression after you cannot pronounce a word or as an answer when do not know where something is located. --Taken from Kent Brockman) ---
**Author:** ![stolichnaya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bcef8e/32.png) [@stolichnaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolichnaya)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/76 "2001-08-14T19:29:54Z")
“meh?” Is there something I’m missing here? Is this a phoenetic spelling? Throw me a frikkin bone here! And one for the road: “Sweet mother of crap!” ---
**Author:** ![Evno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Evno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evno)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/77 "2001-08-14T19:39:44Z")
meh - used when the answer required would otherwise be irrelivant or uninteresting; used with a shoulder shrug (i.e. “yeah, but what’re ya gonna do”) - a simple, one-syllable word, for filler when an opinion is requested and none comes to mind ---
**Author:** ![Survey1215](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecb155/32.png) [@Survey1215](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Survey1215)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/78 "2001-08-14T20:14:17Z")
A couple I forgot, as well (and haven’t seen posted yet): If a meeting/mating ritual/phone call/whatever is bogging down: “Enough of your borax, Poindexter, we need action - take that, ya lousy dimension!” And whenever the wife or I spills/breaks/hurts/maims/etc. something, the guilty party is hit with “Ruiner! (My sister likes you).” God Bless Matt Groening. ---
**Author:** ![JustPlainBryan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@JustPlainBryan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustPlainBryan)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/79 "2001-08-14T21:57:36Z")
I’ve used these a couple of times… Homer - So I asked myself, what would God do in a situation like this? So I turned to the Bible…the ultimate prankster’s bible! Homer - Don’t blame me, I voted for Kodos! Homer - (in a loving fasion)in my eyes, your both potential murderers! Ralph - When I grow up, I wanna be a dinosaur! Bart - I warsh m’self with a rag on a stick! Homer - Let us never speak of the shortcut again. Homer - 30 seconds??? But I want it now!!! Marge - (after a couple of people describe how they are going to spend their money) 100 tacos? Public Broadcasting? I won’t have you throwing you money away like that! ---
**Author:** ![JustPlainBryan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/57b2e6/32.png) [@JustPlainBryan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustPlainBryan)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194/80 "2001-08-14T22:05:18Z")
I’ve used these a couple of times… Homer - So I asked myself, what would God do in a situation like this? So I turned to the Bible…the ultimate prankster’s bible! Homer - Don’t blame me, I voted for Kodos! Homer - (in a loving fasion)in my eyes, your both potential murderers! Ralph - When I grow up, I wanna be a dinosaur! Bart - I warsh m’self with a rag on a stick! Homer - Let us never speak of the shortcut again. Homer - 30 seconds??? But I want it now!!! Marge - (after a couple of people describe how they are going to spend their money) 100 tacos? Public Broadcasting? I won’t have you throwing you money away like that! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-use-of-simpsons-quotes/75194.md?page=5)