# Real-life uses for Simpsons quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 5, 2004, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656 "2004-10-05T15:55:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Katisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bcef8e/32.png) [@Katisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katisha)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/81 "2004-10-07T01:53:14Z")
> [@Dag Otto](#): > > C’mon, admit it. You know you can use this one in real life: > > “Gangway, gotta poop!” That, and “Seymour has to use the toilet! His bladder is full! Full of urine!” ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/82 "2004-10-07T02:25:47Z")
I’ve disarmed a few Crusaders with the: “won’t someone Pleeeeeese think of the children!?” ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/83 "2004-10-07T11:58:04Z")
> [@Mr. Miskatonic](#): > > I’ve disarmed a few Crusaders with the: > > “won’t someone Pleeeeeese think of the children!?” Oh, yeah! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/84 "2004-10-07T12:28:12Z")
I’ve had occasion to use two Ralph Wiggimisms: **I beat the smart kids** –Used when you’re the only one who knows the answer. **I bent my Wooky.** –A good answer to “What’s new” or “What’s wrong” when you don’t want to explain. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/85 "2004-10-07T12:38:28Z")
Another vote for cromulent. I fairly regularly throw the word “embiggen” into stuff and meetings etc. It is always a bit of an icebreaker when someone gets the reference and says that “embiggens is a perfectly cromulent word”. I can do the Barney burp too. ---
**Author:** ![Isosleepy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/isosleepy/32/479_2.png) [@Isosleepy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isosleepy)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/86 "2004-10-07T13:06:12Z")
I love using “Stupid economic recovery” (from when they fled to the no-longer-abandoned warehouse) And, as a non-sequitur, possibly the most brilliant quote from the Simpsons: “Ah, the Luftwaffe - the Washington Generals of the History Channel” ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/87 "2004-10-07T14:40:36Z")
There’s always the standard Burns evil “Excellent…” while steepling your fingers. And after seeing it last night, I’m looking forward to using the Burns line: “Let me put up my legs and pollute my britches in delight!” ---
**Author:** ![Zap\_Rowsdower](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3da27b/32.png) [@Zap\_Rowsdower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zap_Rowsdower)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/88 "2004-10-07T14:40:42Z")
When we’re dividing responsibilites, such as you go get your stuff or whatever and “I’ll deal with those murderous trolls…ugh I mean, I’ll deal with those murderous elves”. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/89 "2004-10-07T14:41:42Z")
And any time I need a shower, Homer’s “I’m as filthy as a Frenchman!” comes in handy. ---
**Author:** ![Zap\_Rowsdower](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3da27b/32.png) [@Zap\_Rowsdower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zap_Rowsdower)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/90 "2004-10-07T14:43:07Z")
> [@Zap\_Rowsdower](#): > > When we’re dividing responsibilites, such as you go get your stuff or whatever and “I’ll deal with those murderous trolls…ugh I mean, I’ll deal with those murderous elves”. D’oh, thats trolls both times. ---
**Author:** ![paulberserker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@paulberserker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paulberserker)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/91 "2004-10-07T14:43:59Z")
When the Tim Burton remake came out on DVD, the kid who sits across from me at work said ‘Paul, you know the Planet of the Apes?’ Quick as a flash - ‘The film or the planet?’ 😃 hah hah, yoink, who’s in the what now? are all staples, as is ‘Just because I don’t care, doesn’t mean I don’t understand’ When I worked behind a bar, it was a constant trick between me, my brother and one of the barstaff to out do each other with random obscure Simpsons quotes. What a time to be alive ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/92 "2004-10-07T16:10:19Z")
“Cheese-eating surrender monkeys” (Groundskeeper Willie’s description of the French) seems to have gained quite a bit of currency… ---
**Author:** ![dasgupta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e56c9b/32.png) [@dasgupta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dasgupta)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/93 "2004-10-07T17:01:19Z")
I’ve used [wiggum]It’s a **ghost** car.[/wiggum] quite a few times. Also used, but not necessarily following the above, is: Homer: Hold me. Wiggum: Only if you hold me. ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/94 "2004-10-07T17:44:03Z")
Yesterday, when the spaghetti stuck together: "I hate it when the noodles stick together. " “Sticking together is what good noodles do!” Used many times: If something is out of reach, “I wish I had my reaching broom.” While slumped on the couch, “Ahhh, there’s nothing like a good sit.” If something is too good to be true, “I’m the magical man, from happy land! In a gum-drop house on lollipop lane!” And my favorite, to be used anytime: “Your flesh mother used to bring me pudding.” ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Means\_Go](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cc9497/32.png) [@Green\_Means\_Go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Means_Go)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/95 "2004-10-07T18:29:00Z")
My all time favorite to use is: “Oh, (\_\_\_\_) are just a suggestion, like pants!” (Homor expresses this sentiment while running a stopsign but it can be used nearly any time you are breaking the rules) The Apu “Please come again” is also very popular at our house. I also occasionally use: Me: “No TV and no beer makes Homer something… something…” My wife (she’s a fan too): Go crazy? Me: Don’t mind if I do!! One I think I need to work into a conversation but havent yet is form the same episode. “Tell you what. If we come back and they’re all dead, I owe you a coke.” ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/96 "2004-10-07T19:03:51Z")
Meh. You heard me. M-e-h. Meh. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/97 "2004-10-07T19:45:27Z")
> [@](#): > > Meh. > > You heard me. M-e-h. Meh. And you read through 95 posts of a Simpson’s threard for what? Hoping to find something other than Simpson’s quotes? ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/98 "2004-10-07T19:48:34Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > And you read through 95 posts of a Simpson’s threard for what? Hoping to find something other than Simpson’s quotes? Whoosh, I believe. ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2004, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/99 "2004-10-07T20:28:42Z")
When my wife tells me to do something, I reply… “What are you gonna sick the dogs on me, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you?” ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656/100 "2004-10-08T00:33:36Z")
> [@alphaFemale](#): > > i’m \*forever \* **WooHoo** ing. So are _The Sims_. (In _Sims 2_, sex is called “Woohoo” as a Simpsons reference). I’ve never found a good use for “cromulent,” but I do use “embiggen” wherever possible. And whenever somebody’s ragging on a different city, I use one of my all-time favorite quotes: “Those kids in [insert city name] are always eating candy! They love the sweet taste!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/real-life-uses-for-simpsons-quotes/267656.md?page=6)