# Really bad "romantic" statements **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 24, 2003, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858 "2003-04-24T14:47:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Orange\_Skinner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3be4f8/32.png) [@Orange\_Skinner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orange_Skinner)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/21 "2003-04-25T00:35:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mr. Excellent \* > \*\*I probably would have kept on in that vein for a minute or so more, explaining how if there was a thermometer in the sock, we could establish the precise hotness of the squirrels, and thus the girl’s own hotness. I might then have added that for maximum accuracy, we’d need to take the pre-sock temperatures of the individual squirrels, and repeat this entire experiment a hundred or so times to get a statistically valid (or less invalid, at least) response. And then all that would be left to do is work out a reasonable system to measure sexual attractiveness in degrees Centigrade, perhaps by measuring temperature changes in men viewing pictures of women of varying attractiveness. > > See, this is why I don’t get laid. 🙂 \*\* [disclaimer] Now, I’m a weirdo, [/disclaimer] but you had me at “pre-sock tempurature,” **Mr. E**. Had you used a semicolon in that post, I’d be proverbial head over proverbial heels. * * * An example of my cheesiness, while pretending to flirt with a girl in my French Class: _Laura, you are like an accent mark…your very presence changes the intonation of my voice. You are uplifting, exotic, unique. It goes without saying–it is a rule–that you be placed higher than the subordinate characters that surround you. You are the finishing touch on the language of romance. Unfortunately, there are times when you also serve no real purpose, except to inform anybody who cares that the letter ‘s’ used to come after that ‘e’._ ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/22 "2003-04-25T01:02:11Z")
First big arguement with the **NinjaGuy**. He called me the next morning (wake-up call), and said: “The fact that I can’t stand you being mad at me outweighs being incredibly pissed off right now. And I got up just to call you, so don’t you dare argue with me.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/23 "2003-04-25T01:35:19Z")
Oy vey. All the goddamn _time_. Tom and I are absolutely disgusting together, it’s a good thing that we’re the only people who have to put up with us. I think I was the first one to say “I love you infinity times.” ---
**Author:** ![Phax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Phax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phax)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/24 "2003-04-25T03:56:36Z")
“The light from the TV shines in your eyes like glissening emeralds”. Thank God she understood that I was drunk. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/25 "2003-04-25T04:24:18Z")
A high school friend who shall be forever nameless once peered soulfully into my eyes and asked, “May I deflower you?” ---
**Author:** ![Potter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Potter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Potter)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/26 "2003-04-25T11:38:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > \*\*I think I was the first one to say “I love you infinity times.” \*\* To which I think I replied “Oh yeah? Well, _I_ love you infinity-plus-one.” Apparently I’m also nicer than cookies and ice-cream. I’m waiting 'til I’m nicer than yogurt, as that’s the biggie. Don’t even get us started on petnames. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/27 "2003-04-25T13:37:12Z")
With the last woman I dated, just a few months ago. It was our first real make-out session, which had led to heavy petting, clothes had come off, etc. Me: “Thank you.” Her: “For what?” Me: “For giving me pleasure.” She just rolled her eyes. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Stanislaus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stanislaus/32/3391_2.png) [@Stanislaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stanislaus)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/28 "2003-04-25T13:56:27Z")
She said, “You’re one in a million.” I said, “So, you mean there’s 6000 of me?” Another beautiful moment fractures on my pedantic literalism. In terms of OTT romantic statements, I once cried off answering “Do you prefer my hair up or down?” by claiming it was like distinguishing between a ruby and saphire. It worked too. Same person - and we’re still going out! Apparently it’s because I have cute eyes. This is absolutely fine by me, but it does mean that I can either wear shades or talk to her over over the summer, but not both. Tricky. ---
**Author:** ![ASD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@ASD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASD)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/29 "2003-04-25T15:09:47Z")
An old boyfriend once told me, very sincerely, that he loved my multi-fauceted personality. I tried really hard not to laugh at him. I should have known from that day that it wouldn’t work. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/30 "2003-04-25T15:56:22Z")
I just want to say, for the record, that **IDemandBeer** is now officially my hero. Me to wife: I love you. Wife: Why’s that? Me: Because you can always tell when I need another beer. ---
**Author:** ![Tir\_Tinuviel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tir\_Tinuviel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tir_Tinuviel)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2003, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858/31 "2003-04-25T16:08:11Z")
heee, **Twisty** loves me more than Sundays… That still cracks me up… bless his little cotton socks! We’re gross together… like a couple of big wet sappy things in a bucket. I love it! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-romantic-statements/170858.md?page=1)