# Really bad tattoos. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 21, 2006, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596 "2006-05-21T01:36:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/21 "2006-05-21T15:16:56Z")
> [@adam yax](#): > > The tattooed johnson boggles my mind. I can’t imagine how uncomfortable it must be to get testicles tattooed. I’m just trying to figure out the logistics of it. I mean, it’d have to be fully erect to get all the skin inked…but how the hell would you keep a guy fully erect for the three or four hours that tat would take? On second thought, no, I don’t really want to know. There’s not only some bad tattoo designs there, there’s some bad tattooing going on. Like Misnomer’s clone - I don’t know how they messed up the stencil that bad, but the mouth is too far forward - it looks like a rat. Misnomer’s actually looks kinda sweet. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/22 "2006-05-21T15:56:15Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > I’m just trying to figure out the logistics of it. I mean, it’d have to be fully erect to get all the skin inked…but how the hell would you keep a guy fully erect for the three or four hours that tat would take? > > On second thought, no, I don’t really want to know. Viagra and cockrings? Or maybe he was getting off on the whole thing. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/23 "2006-05-21T16:10:57Z")
All the other creepy ones mentioned, and nothing about Michael Jackson touching up McCauley Culkin? :eek: What’s wrong with you? Think of the children, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/24 "2006-05-21T16:22:52Z")
Thanks for the favorable comparisons, everyone. 🙂 I should have been more clear in my post that I know my tattoo is a good one, and much better than the one on that site. I’ve had it for almost 8 years and have always been very happy with it. Like I said, I knew it wasn’t an original design when I got it, but until yesterday I’d never seen it anywhere but in the portfolio of the guy who did my tat – it just shocked me to see a crappy version of it turn up on a “bad tattoos” web site! I knew exactly what it was before the image was even halfway loaded … what a weird feeling. > [@Argent Towers](#): > > Whoever wrote that seems to not understand that the cheeseburger tattoo is supposed to mean “Cheeseburger in Paradise,” a Jimmy Buffett song. Whether or not this is a concept worthy of a tattoo is beside the point, it is symbolic of something. > [@WhyNot](#): > > There’s not only some bad tattoo designs there, there’s some bad tattooing going on. I also meant to mention points similar to these. I think the site owner’s bias is _very_ clear, despite the first page’s weak “I have nothing against tattoos or people that have them” disclaimer. Like the one on the first page with the guy who got a copy of the photo of the boy holding flowers: from what I can see that tattoo is pretty good, but what the site owner doesn’t like about it is that it’s a tattoo of a picture. So with no understanding of what that image might mean to the person who got it, and no desire to even _try_ to understand, he/she writes it off as a “really bad” tattoo. Also, while I agree that there are some truly bad tattoos on that site, the owner doesn’t seem to understand that there’s a difference between a bad design/concept and bad tattooing. Some of the tattoos are of questionable design but are done well, and vice-versa. ---
**Author:** ![cerberus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cerberus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cerberus)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/25 "2006-05-21T16:39:40Z")
Precisely why was the the Indigenous woman coupling with the business end of a corn dog? And last time I checked, pogosticks do not (unless spceficially manufactured to do so) resemble corn dogs. ---
**Author:** ![Opus1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/858c86/32.png) [@Opus1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opus1)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/26 "2006-05-21T21:50:59Z")
Just when I was about to say “This page is missing the worst of the worst,” and go scrounge up a link, I see that “Mr. Cool Ice” is the very last tattoo on page 3. Save the best for last, I guess. Disappointed not to see a comment about the gay skeleton, however. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/27 "2006-05-21T22:34:07Z")
OK, I’m sheltered … what’s with the corn and broccoli? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/28 "2006-05-21T22:39:59Z")
> [@Snooooopy](#): > > OK, I’m sheltered … what’s with the corn and broccoli? They’re fucking. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/29 "2006-05-21T22:56:15Z")
I sincerely hope that some of those (stars wars, hulk hogan) are either not tatoos or are not permanent. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2006, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/30 "2006-05-21T23:13:36Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > They’re fucking. But why corn and broccoli? ---
**Author:** ![Greywolf73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/31 "2006-05-22T00:29:20Z")
> [@Snooooopy](#): > > But why corn and broccoli? Because they love each other very very much? ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/32 "2006-05-22T00:49:58Z")
> [@Snooooopy](#): > > OK, I’m sheltered … what’s with the corn and broccoli? I _think_ he’s making fun of the Veggie Tales. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/33 "2006-05-22T01:14:59Z")
> [@Fern Forest](#): > > I _think_ he’s making fun of the Veggie Tales. That was my thought as well. Kind of like getting a tat of Davey doing Goliath doggy style. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/34 "2006-05-22T03:55:01Z")
[Geeks get tattos too!](http://www.molokosynthemesc.com/search/srch2004.exe?pic=tattoo/A51121/high/bmepb171269.jpg&tsect=tattoo/geek001.html&desc=Pac+Man+Butt+Maze%3Cbr%3E%3Cfont+size%3D-1%3EThe+old+school+Pac+Man+maze+on+my+butt%3Cbr%3E%28by+Eric+Rieth%2C+Seventh+Son+Tattoo%2C+San+Francisco%2C+CA%29) (possibly NSFW) ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/35 "2006-05-22T14:03:21Z")
You ain’t seen bad tatoos until you’ve seen home-made prison tatoos. My husband (works there) showed me a selection of photos of them. (They have to take pictures of them as “identifying marks” for their records.) They’re sloppy, words spelled incorrectly, and all in one color–blue. (They use a needle and ink from a ballpoint.) ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/36 "2006-05-22T14:09:08Z")
Nothing can top the one I saw a couple years ago on Livejournal…some girl got a new tattoo and posted pictures because she was so happy and proud. It was around her lower back, and it was of all things the Goo Goo Dolls lyrics, “You Bleed Just To Know You’re Alive” with blood dripping from it. Yeah, that alone would be bad enough. Except she’d misspelled “you’re”. It said, [“You Bleed Just To Know **Your** Alive”](http://members.cox.net/maxtorque/badtat.jpg). Many people pointed this out and snickered heartily. She got all defensive and claimed she’d _wanted_ it spelled that way. Suuuuurrreeee… ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/37 "2006-05-22T18:49:43Z")
> [@Snooooopy](#): > > But why corn and broccoli? I have two trains of thought on this. First, Frank Zappa and The Mothers had a song, _Call Any Vegetable,_ about sex with vegetables. “…Standing there, shiny and bright by your side, Holding your joint while the neighbors decide, Why is a vegetable something to hide? To Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiide?” Second, there’s that word “cornhole.” ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/38 "2006-05-22T19:19:49Z")
Well, I thought that maybe it had to do with the punchline of a joke about Chinese food, given the name of the image (“Phuking-vegetables”) ~ Phu King Vegetables? Like the name of some kind of food? But Google tells me that I’m wrong, because I can’t find a joke like that anywhere. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/39 "2006-05-22T19:30:21Z")
> [@Max Torque](#): > > Nothing can top the one I saw a couple years ago on Livejournal…some girl got a new tattoo and posted pictures because she was so happy and proud. It was around her lower back, and it was of all things the Goo Goo Dolls lyrics, “You Bleed Just To Know You’re Alive” with blood dripping from it. Yeah, that alone would be bad enough. > > Except she’d misspelled “you’re”. It said, [“You Bleed Just To Know **Your** Alive”](http://members.cox.net/maxtorque/badtat.jpg). > > Many people pointed this out and snickered heartily. She got all defensive and claimed she’d _wanted_ it spelled that way. Suuuuurrreeee… That chick has one hell of a hairy back. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2006, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596/40 "2006-05-22T19:34:55Z")
The corn dog one was a cover up. It was a giant spurting penis. My favorite part is her gap tooth grin. Ahh, but do I miss the livejournal community Bad Tattoos. It was amazing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-bad-tattoos/357596.md?page=1)