# Really, Marley23? ("insult" or not) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 19, 2008, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560 "2008-08-19T15:01:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/1 "2008-08-19T15:01:00Z")
Re: [this post.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=10112037&postcount=33) I’m trying to figure out how “Go Fuck Yourself” (which we all knew is what was meant) is a personal insult. A crass suggestion, sure. A heated rejoinder, certainly. But consider what it was in response to: a post posted in a thread asking a specific question of fat people, where one would assume fat people are answering, filled with some pretty wretched and unambiguous personal insults. I’m not one to call the PC police. I don’t really care if \*\*friedo \*\*is officially warned or not, and I suspect, by the letter of the rules, he’s protected by the group insult clause anyway (insults are allowed if they’re directed at groups or offboard people, not individual posters). But I find **VunderBob** ’s response completely understandable and not an insult as I understand the term. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/2 "2008-08-19T15:08:01Z")
Nope, definitely not an insult. More like a helpful suggestion to someone who is thinking too hard. And if you disagree, you can GFY. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/3 "2008-08-19T15:23:36Z")
How is telling someone to go fuck themselves not insulting them? I don’t even know any circumstances where that wouldn’t be offensive and insulting. (Well, maybe if you’re talking to a hermaphroditic earthworm who needs to reproduce but can’t find a mate.) ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/4 "2008-08-19T15:28:30Z")
Yeah, I’m with **Captain Amazing** –I don’t see how it can’t be an insult. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/5 "2008-08-19T15:31:13Z")
I thought the original comment that sparked the GFY was intended to be humorous snark–I took it that way. **Friedo** wasn’t calling “people of size” those names, he was highlighting the absurdity of the phrasing. I did like the Scottish touch. If I had to say, I’d say both the **Friedo** (for possible inappropriate humor) and \*\*VunderBob \*\*(over reaction to same)were half wrong. Not worth getting all umbraged up about. Unless I couldn’t get into a stall to pee, of course… 😃 (weak attempt at humor–will now go away). ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/6 "2008-08-19T15:31:38Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Amazing] How is telling someone to go fuck themselves not insulting them? I don’t even know any circumstances where that wouldn’t be offensive and insulting. (Well, maybe if you’re talking to a hermaphroditic earthworm who needs to reproduce but can’t find a mate.) [/QUOTE] That’s actually a good question. My dictionary defines insult as “1. an offensive remark or action.” I guess I view an insult as an intentionally hurtful comment \*about \*someone - their looks, their intelligence, their income, their life, and that seems to be how the board has generally interpreted the rule. But I might be wrong about that, sure. I didn’t start the thread because I think I’m right, but because I wonder about it. The only reason it’s in the Pit is because it’s discussion of a moderator’s actions. My intent is not to “Pit” **Marley23** , but to see what other people think, as well. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/7 "2008-08-19T15:35:06Z")
Yes, Virginia, “go fuck yourself” is an insult. Those kinds of comments have always been deemed insults here, because, you know, the point of saying them is to insult and offend people. If it walks like a duck, fucks like a duck, etc. Make up a different term for it if you like - we won’t allow whatever those are either. It’s a distinction without a difference, since rejoinders like “go fuck yourself” have always drawn mod warnings. I thought about warning **friedo** for the joke and he should think harder about it the future. I decided not to give him a warning because I decided he was making a joke about “sensitive terms” and not making fun of the overweight. Even if **friedo** was way beyond the pale, that doesn’t give everybody else license to say insulting things in response. We’ve always been clear about the fact that if someone breaks a rule and insults you, you’re not supposed to drag the discussion down by responding in kind. If people want to tell **friedo** to go fuck himself, that’s what this forum is for. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/8 "2008-08-19T15:36:24Z")
I don’t see how “Fuck you” or “go fuck yourself” or “Eat shit” or even “Go jump in a lake” aren’t offensive remarks or actions. ETA: didn’t see Marley’s post, so I guess this is redundant. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/9 "2008-08-19T15:44:15Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] That’s actually a good question. My dictionary defines insult as “1. an offensive remark or action.” I guess I view an insult as an intentionally hurtful comment \*about \*someone - their looks, their intelligence, their income, their life, and that seems to be how the board has generally interpreted the rule. But I might be wrong about that, sure. I didn’t start the thread because I think I’m right, but because I wonder about it. [/QUOTE] I think you’re getting a bit overly literal with the rule here. The intent of the “no personal insults outside the Pit” rule is to allow for civil discussion free of flaming. Whether vulgar suggestions (e.g. “go fuck your mother”) are technically insults is immaterial, since the point of the rule is not to ban anything personally insulting, but to limit flame-style discourse. Similarly, just because someone is insulted by another poster’s remarks doesn’t make them against the rules. The goal is not to be hamstrung by the wording of the rules – the rules are meant to give you guys a guide as to what is OK, not to be a legal code. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/10 "2008-08-19T15:51:56Z")
**Marley** , I got your warning loud and clear, Foxtrot Whiskey India Whiskey. All I’m gonna say about it any further is this is my first warning I’ve had in 6 years and 7k+ posts as a Doper. To get that hard of a reaction out of me, it had to hit very close to home. I’ll now retire to the MMP to revel in looniness I understand. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/11 "2008-08-19T16:02:51Z")
[QUOTE=Giraffe] I think you’re getting a bit overly literal with the rule here. The intent of the “no personal insults outside the Pit” rule is to allow for civil discussion free of flaming. Whether vulgar suggestions (e.g. “go fuck your mother”) are technically insults is immaterial, since the point of the rule is not to ban anything personally insulting, but to limit flame-style discourse. Similarly, just because someone is insulted by another poster’s remarks doesn’t make them against the rules. The goal is not to be hamstrung by the wording of the rules – the rules are meant to give you guys a guide as to what is OK, not to be a legal code. [/QUOTE] Makes sense. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/12 "2008-08-19T18:11:01Z")
Well, just my 2 cents, but I didn’t think **friedo** was joking. ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/13 "2008-08-19T18:45:35Z")
What about when you make them so ornate and over the top that they are clearly intended to be jokes? My earliest one was a week or two ago: “You son of disgruntled mole and a giraffe. I exhale vehemently on the armpits of the plumbers of your second cousins.” That was not in the Pit, and I was not reprimanded, I assume because no one was offended by it. I thought it was a funny way of saying “Your viewpoint irritates me.” Would that qualify as an insult? ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/14 "2008-08-19T18:48:18Z")
[QUOTE=VunderBob] **Marley** , I got your warning loud and clear, Foxtrot Whiskey India Whiskey. All I’m gonna say about it any further is this is my first warning I’ve had in 6 years and 7k+ posts as a Doper. To get that hard of a reaction out of me, it had to hit very close to home. I’ll now retire to the MMP to revel in looniness I understand. [/QUOTE] Don’t feel too bad, **Bob** …I was thisclose to doing the same thing way before you posted it. Only a quick check at which forum it was in stopped me. ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/15 "2008-08-19T18:49:53Z")
Personally, I like to fuck myself, I don’t see the big deal. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/16 "2008-08-19T18:55:10Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] Personally, I like to fuck myself, I don’t see the big deal. [/QUOTE] Yeah, but remember that “go fuck yourself” is usually shorthand for “go fuck yourself with a [insert cold, sharp and/or rusty object here].” ---
**Author:** ![Litoris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9f8e36/32.png) [@Litoris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Litoris)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/17 "2008-08-19T19:13:30Z")
[QUOTE=Q.E.D.] Yeah, but remember that “go fuck yourself” is usually shorthand for “go fuck yourself with a [insert cold, sharp and/or rusty object here].” [/QUOTE] Did you want details of my onanism? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/18 "2008-08-19T19:54:00Z")
[QUOTE=Litoris] Did you want details of my onanism? 😉 [/QUOTE] Please. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![nd\_n8](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/439d5e/32.png) [@nd\_n8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nd_n8)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/19 "2008-08-19T20:55:28Z")
As a CFA I have to say I was not offended at all by the comments. We could all use a little humility to help us get over ourselves. It’s life, not a beauty or popularity contest, and it’s too damn short to let the dumb shit get you down. Regards, Nate 5’ 10" 336lbs - I’m not here to build walls. I was born to bust through them mother fuckers. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2008, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560/20 "2008-08-19T23:46:35Z")
[QUOTE=nd\_n8] As a CFA I have to say I was not offended at all by the comments. We could all use a little humility to help us get over ourselves. It’s life, not a beauty or popularity contest, and it’s too damn short to let the dumb shit get you down. Regards, Nate 5’ 10" 336lbs - I’m not here to build walls. I was born to bust through them mother fuckers. [/QUOTE] So you have realized your special purpose in life? Get jiggy with it. 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-marley23-insult-or-not/460560.md?page=2)