# Really, really STUPID song lyrics. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 8, 2009, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350 "2009-01-08T06:53:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2009, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/101 "2009-01-12T14:53:09Z")
> [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](#): > > Mary sounds like merry > Harry sounds like Barry > Mary and Harry do not rhyme. I’ve sat right in front of my friend who thinks these all have the same vowel sound, and exaggeratedly pronounced the differences I believe they have. He could not hear the difference! To this day I can’t get him to say whether their dog was named Barry or Berry, because he pronouces them the same. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2009, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/102 "2009-01-12T14:54:10Z")
> [@Bites\_When\_Provoked](#): > > That’s more of a mondegreen, isn’t it? (I wanna rock and roll all night, and \*party \*every day.) Yep, but KISS was mentioned so I had to throw in my favorite new quote! ---
**Author:** ![Sateryn76](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Sateryn76](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sateryn76)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2009, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/103 "2009-01-12T15:12:52Z")
> [@Huerta88](#): > > Ahh, part of that is just a suburban white girl’s blackface-show attempt to make herself sound “street.” Chrissy Hynde did much the same trying to sound “soulful” on “Brass In Pocket.” I’m not sure any black person would utter the phrase “I gonna,” but I’m certain no white not intent on minstrel-showism would. Plus Chrissy sounds through the entire song like she just suffered a moderate stroke, with all the put-on slurring (of some lyrics that might in fact merit inclusion here: “Gonna use my sidestep [if that’s in fact what she’s saying?]” WTF?). Second Verse… GOT RHYTHM I CAN’T MISS A BEAT **GOT NEW SKANK IT’S SO REET** GOT SOMETHING I’M WINKING AT YOU Really? And I just wanted to add my own favorite toast lines. It’s from a comic I saw on HBO when I was a kid - super crazy goofy guy that wrote this song… _All around the world from coast to coast People always say what do you like the most I don’t like to brag, I don’t like to boast But I always say, "I like Toast!_ He also had a good one “Looking at the World Through Flies’ Eyes” which involved him wearing huge screen colanders over his eyes. Funny stuff… ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2009, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/104 "2009-01-12T17:47:52Z")
\<\\> [http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=4229](http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=4229) ---
**Author:** ![Nom\_de\_Plume](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/85f322/32.png) [@Nom\_de\_Plume](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nom_de_Plume)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/105 "2009-01-12T19:38:23Z")
> [@johnspartan](#): > > I always thought “For those about to rock, we salute you” is dumb — or at least really bizarre, in its specificity. while **RoOsh** was right that it’s based on the ancient Latin..the way it’s worded here in English is just…well, DUMB. Is he talking to the ones about to rock? If so, why does he refer to them in the third person in the introductory prepositional phrase (“…for **those** about to rock..”), and then switch to the second person (“…we salute **you** …” ) It’s just not clear…who’s about to rock? …who’s being saluted…? How about “We salute those who are about to rock”? Or even “Speaking as a representative of those guys over there who are too busy preparing to rock that they’re unable to speak for themselves, I would like to pass along a salute to you.” (Here, “you” being some unnamed person to whom the song is, apparently, being sung.") ---
**Author:** ![JR\_Brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JR\_Brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JR_Brown)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2009, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/106 "2009-01-13T20:43:36Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > Just noticed I’ve made not one on-topic post. So to fix that. . . > > Wings’ Jet > > _I thought the major was a lady suffragette._ > What reason would anyone have for uttering that sentence? Having never heard (or heard of) this song, I have no clue if this is what the songwriters intended, but back in the 1890s-1910s, women campaigning for the right to vote (=“lady suffragettes”) could be quite militant and often played up female members of “manly” occupations (police, firefighters, military). So perhaps the major was mistaken for a woman in uniform? I leave it to others to determine whether this is a plausible interpretation. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2009, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/107 "2009-01-13T21:19:26Z")
> [@JR\_Brown](#): > > Having never heard (or heard of) this song, I have no clue if this is what the songwriters intended, but back in the 1890s-1910s, women campaigning for the right to vote (=“lady suffragettes”) could be quite militant and often played up female members of “manly” occupations (police, firefighters, military). So perhaps the major was mistaken for a woman in uniform? I leave it to others to determine whether this is a plausible interpretation. The song seems to be about a girl named Jet who was going to get married but her father, who had the balls of a sergeant major, thought she was too young. Plus, her hair was made of lace. Must not forget the hair of a thousand laces-- on the moon. ---
**Author:** ![ShadowFacts](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shadowfacts/32/2934_2.png) [@ShadowFacts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShadowFacts)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2009, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/108 "2009-01-13T21:35:14Z")
> [@Morbo](#): > > Lil’ Wayne, Dr. Carter: > > _Swagger tighter than a yeast infection / > Fly go hard like geese erection._ > > I win. Yup. I gotta bow to that entry. Are you sure that’s accurate?? Holy crap! :eek: Sounds like someone talking in their sleep who thinks they’re awake…It makes perfect sense in their dream world but none in the real world. ---
**Author:** ![beanpod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9adbd/32.png) [@beanpod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beanpod)\ **Post date:** [January 13, 2009, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/109 "2009-01-13T23:34:45Z")
I’ve mentioned it before somewhere–and I know other people have too–but _Do They Know It’s Christmas (Feed The World)_ is the stupidest song ever written. Ever. [Band Aid 20 - Do They Know It's Christmas? Lyrics | AZLyrics.com](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/bandaid20/dotheyknowitschristmas.html) These lyrics make me stabby: _And there won’t be snow in Africa this Christmastime The greatest gift they’ll get this year is life Where nothing ever grows No rain nor rivers flow Do they know it’s Christmastime at all?_ Aaaaaaaaaaargh, you imbeciles! Nothing grows in Africa? It never rains there? No rivers? Heard of the fucking Nile, you dumbass? Do you realize that famines have been exacerbated by political turmoil and war, and not _just_ climate problems? And there _won’t be snow in Africa_ this Christmas? Oh no! Doooooom! There won’t be snow in December on a continent that has its top half smack dab on the equator and the bottom half in the southern hemisphere? I mean _fuck_. I know they were trying to raise money for poor people, but come on, they could actually create art that’s based on the real world problems instead of saying, “Hey, guys, I hear Africa’s a shithole. Let’s drop some rice on them and feel better about ourselves, eh?” That song isn’t good for my blood pressure. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/110 "2009-01-14T00:11:37Z")
> [@](#): > > And there won’t be snow in Africa this Christmastime Not even the snows of Kilimanjaro? ---
**Author:** ![Swords\_to\_Plowshares](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b38774/32.png) [@Swords\_to\_Plowshares](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swords_to_Plowshares)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/111 "2009-01-14T05:18:22Z")
Nine in the Afternoon by Panic! At the Disco has some pretty horrid lyrics. Cause it’s nine in the afternoon And your eyes are the size of the moon **You could 'cause you can so you do** We’re feeling so good just the way that we do When it’s nine in the afternoon What does the bolded line even _mean_? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/112 "2009-01-14T15:00:41Z")
> [@Johnny\_Q](#): > > Not even the snows of Kilimanjaro? Doesn’t that rise like Olympus above the Serengeti? ---
**Author:** ![bluecanary](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bluecanary/32/3614_2.png) [@bluecanary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bluecanary)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/113 "2009-01-14T15:35:02Z")
Another infamous one: **Elton John - 'Your Song’** _“If I were a sculptor, but then again no”_ ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/114 "2009-01-14T17:36:15Z")
There seems to be a [confabulation of threads](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=501547) that had me confuzzled for a second. I hear the drums in Africa blessing the rain. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/115 "2009-01-14T18:40:37Z")
> [@Swords\_to\_Plowshares](#): > > Nine in the Afternoon by Panic! At the Disco has some pretty horrid lyrics. > > Cause it’s nine in the afternoon > And your eyes are the size of the moon > **You could 'cause you can so you do** > We’re feeling so good > just the way that we do > When it’s nine in the afternoon > > What does the bolded line even _mean_? It’s part and parcel of bands who try to be the next Mid-to-late Beatles: power pop combined with nonsensical lyrics. Cf Sloan’s _Navy Blues_. Not that I think they should not have better lyrics, just that I like all three of them even without sensical lyrics (Panic and Mid-Beatles, that is: the Sloan album is more of a pastiche so gets away with having stupid lyrics.) ---
**Author:** ![CoBa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f6c823/32.png) [@CoBa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoBa)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/116 "2009-01-14T19:44:32Z")
Does Lemon Demon count? The intro to Word Disassociation: _Enemy, lasagna, Robust, below, wax, Semiautomatic, aqua, Accompany, slacks, Why, coffee, gymnastic, Motorcycle, unibrow, Existential, plastic, Extra, nightly, cow_ ---
**Author:** ![beanpod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9adbd/32.png) [@beanpod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beanpod)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/117 "2009-01-14T19:54:22Z")
> [@](#): > > Extra, nightly, cow This is lovely and has so many possibilities. I keep hearing it as a chant or a slogan. I’m imagining a group protest with signs. Some people shout, “E-ne-my!? La-sa-gna!?” and the rest answer “EX-tra night-ly COW!” Just think of what you could _do_ with an extra nightly cow. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/118 "2009-01-14T21:29:43Z")
Well I always scratched my head at this > [@](#): > > I’m never alone > I’m alone all the time > are you at one > or do you lie > we live in a wheel > where everyone steals > but when we rise it’s like strawberry fields Bush, _Glycerine_. Not bad so much as … random. ---
**Author:** ![TheBoltEater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@TheBoltEater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheBoltEater)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/119 "2009-01-14T22:15:48Z")
> [@Asimovian](#): > > I, too, haven’t stopped laughing at the ghost/toast lyrics. That may be my new favorite song, and it certainly wins the thread. > > However, I want to submit my nomination for a very clear second. It seems so obvious when you think about it. Vanilla Ice’s _Ice Ice Baby_ contains, for example, this gem: > > _Quick to the point, to the point no fakin’ > I’m cooking MC’s like a pound of bacon_ > > It amazes me that a man who can put together timeless similes such as that with a funky beat hasn’t achieved more lasting success. Well now you’ve thrown down the gauntlet, and I must counter your Lame White Rapper with the Lamest White Rapper of all time. I give you Snow, with his hit song, _Informer_ _Informer You know say daddy me Snow me-a (gonna) blame A licky boom-boom down_ ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2009, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350/120 "2009-01-14T23:18:01Z")
In the category of “it don’t rhyme but what the hell” I contribute the following couplet from Head Hands & Feet’s “Delaware”: _They say the lines are down in Utah Cincinnati’s had a race war_ Not a bad song, but…glurk. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/really-really-stupid-song-lyrics/480350.md?page=7)