# Recast the original Star Wars movies for a hypothetical remake. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 19, 2005, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537 "2005-05-19T04:59:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/21 "2005-05-19T16:40:55Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > And yet it’s interesting that we’ve had two proposed Obi-Wans who are not different from the original one: well-respected British actors who would end up hating the role and everything associated with it. 😛 Patrick Stewart is philosophical but vaguely annoyed with Trekdom, Star Wars would be at least as bad. The closest McKellen has come to sci-fi is the X-Men series and he seems to be having a lot of fun with those. McKellen has by far the healthiest attitude about fun summer blockbusters: do your work, collect your millions, go home and enjoy young boyfriends and rented mansions on Ibiza. I knew that Guinness disliked any mention of Obi Wan but I didn’t realize how much until recently: he actually said that had he known how identified he’d be he’d never have taken the role. DUDE! You worked a few months in the desert and on soundstages, said some admittedly corny dialogue, and emerged from it one of the richest actors in the world due to a brilliant percentage deal he worked out in lieu of higher salary. While actors of equal luster were doing total schlock just to pay the bills and the godawful English income taxes, you never had to work again except in projects that interested you- not all eyes will weep for you. (Sometimes I understand Lucas’s low opinion of live actors.) Mahoney as Obi-Wan: I’m picturing him pulling Anakin’s light sabre from the crevice in his old recliner in the cave. ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/22 "2005-05-19T16:52:49Z")
I was going to suggest: David Hyde Pierce for **C-3PO** Clive Owen for **Han Solo** Will Smith for **Lando Calrissian** I’m still struggling for a voice for Vader, none of the ones mentioned here get the job done, and the perfect Grand Moff Tarkin. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/23 "2005-05-19T16:58:00Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > McKellen has by far the healthiest attitude about fun summer blockbusters: do your work, collect your millions, go home and enjoy young boyfriends and rented mansions on Ibiza. Yeah, it’s a very hard philosophy to argue with. That was one of my favorite things about X2: he was obviously having a ball. Lord of the Rings was a bigger deal, but I’ve never heard him complain about anything he’s done. He’d prefer to be in theatre, and I guess at this point he understands he’s so famous and rich that he can do whatever he wants anyhow. Which is a pretty good position to be in! > [@](#): > > I knew that Guinness disliked any mention of Obi Wan but I didn’t realize how much until recently: he actually said that had he known how identified he’d be he’d never have taken the role. Oh yeah, he was pretty damn bitter about it. I think that part of it is his age. He was 63 when he did Star Wars and he must’ve felt like his life’s work was being overlooked because of this dumb movie. “Come on now, I was in Bridge on the River Kwai and Lawrence of Arabia and all that, stop calling me Obi-Wan!” By comparison Shatner and Nimoy were young when they did Star Trek, and maybe they’ve complained but I haven’t heard it. They certainly don’t seem to mind where they are now, as complete jokes. Of course, they don’t have that much talent… ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/24 "2005-05-19T16:59:55Z")
> [@Omniscient](#): > > I was going to suggest: > > David Hyde Pierce for **C-3PO** > Clive Owen for **Han Solo** > Will Smith for **Lando Calrissian** > > I’m still struggling for a voice for Vader, none of the ones mentioned here get the job done, and the perfect Grand Moff Tarkin. What about Michael Dorn, both body and voice, for Darth Vader? ---
**Author:** ![Gilligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Gilligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gilligan)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/25 "2005-05-19T17:11:47Z")
Ack, too many of mine have been taken already. Here is what I have left: Luke - Topher Grace Vader - Hugo Weaving ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/26 "2005-05-19T17:20:36Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > What about Michael Dorn, both body and voice, for Darth Vader? That was the first one I thought of too. Now I’m hearing “Luke, I am WEASEL!” ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/27 "2005-05-19T17:32:30Z")
Here’s one out of left field for Darth Vader’s voice – John Hillerman (Higgins from “Magnum PI”). He’s obviously too short for the suit, but the voice… yeah, that might work. I was also thinking William Daniels (from “St Elsewhere” and also the voice of KITT) as C3PO. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/28 "2005-05-19T17:49:37Z")
I’d stick with Ewan McGregor and age him for Obi-Wan. He owned that role. Minor characters-I could see Sam Waterston as an older Wedge Antilles. Maybe he could play one of the Rebel generals? ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/29 "2005-05-19T17:52:41Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > I was also thinking William Daniels (from “St Elsewhere” and also the voice of KITT) as C3PO. _Here on foul, fetid, fuming foggy filthy… Hesperidium_!\* \*one of the moons of Coruscant ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/30 "2005-05-19T18:54:29Z")
I know the OP is just mental maturbation, but… This really underscores a major disappointment that I have with most every major Holywood release. Movies don’t get made unless they can plaster a “big” name up on the marquee. Are people really going to the movies to see the actor instead of the actual movie? I’d really love to see some new talent so that I can be drawn to the development of a character instead of spending valuable screen time trying to mentally detach a “big name” actor from his or her previous roles. Case in point: Keanu Reeves can never play anything other than the role of Neo in a Matrix sequel. His appearance, mannerisms and speech idiosyncrasies are forever tied to that character in my mind. A few months ago, a friend brough a DVD to my house for us to watch. It was called [The Transporter](http://imdb.com/title/tt0293662/). I eyed the cover suspiciously. What the hell is this, I thought. Never saw any TV commercials or trailers. Turned over the DVD box - Frank Martin? Qi Shu? Matt Schulze? Who the hell are these people? I lowered my expectations and popped in the DVD. Turns out that I enjoyed the movie imensely. There was actually a half a plot, a few interesting twists, and the actors were all blank slates making it very enjoyable to see the characters grown from scratch instead of haloween costumes tacked-on too of megastars. This is something that made SW4, 5 and 6 more enjoyable for me - no big names. SW4: James Jones was perhaps the biggest name and you only _heard_ him, for cryin out loud. Harrison Ford? Mark Hammil? Carrie Fisher? They were all nobodies, and it was great. SW5: Introducing Billy Dee Williams. Well, not that bad, They needed and appealing black character. Lucky for me I hadn’t seen much of his work so he was a fresh face for me. Frank Oz: well, it was a little annoying hearing Fozie Bear’s voice coming out of a Jedi Master’s mouth, but I didn’t let it bother me. SW6: Well, it was 1983 and I was still in highschool. If Ian McDiarmid had a screen history behind him, I hadn’t seen it. Lucky for me, because Palpatine is the role he was born to play. SW1: Portman, McGregor, Neeson - names I’ve heard but only in passing. I hope this isn’t the start of some ugly trend. SW2: Christopher Lee? What is Saruman doing in Star Wars? Shrug. SW3: Could have done without Jimmy Smits, who’s name I always want to pronounce “jimminy Smits”. But having said all that, > [@](#): > > I’d cast Leonardo DiCaprio as Luke and Natalie Portman as Leia. DiCaprio could do a pretty good Leia. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/31 "2005-05-19T19:00:04Z")
> [@](#): > > haloween costumes tacked-on too of megastars. Not sure what I’m trying to say here - possibly tacked-onto megastars. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/32 "2005-05-19T19:12:04Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > I was also thinking William Daniels (from “St Elsewhere” and also the voice of KITT) as C3PO. Oh, I _like_ that one! ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/33 "2005-05-19T20:06:37Z")
The entire script rewritten… by Terry Pratchett. Or possibly redirected by Quentin Tarantino. That’ll do it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/34 "2005-05-19T20:14:32Z")
> [@Patty O'Furniture](#): > > A few months ago, a friend brough a DVD to my house for us to watch. It was called [The Transporter](http://imdb.com/title/tt0293662/). I eyed the cover suspiciously. What the hell is this, I thought. Never saw any TV commercials or trailers. Turned over the DVD box - Frank Martin? Qi Shu? Matt Schulze? Who the hell are these people? I lowered my expectations and popped in the DVD. > > Turns out that I enjoyed the movie imensely. There was actually a half a plot, a few interesting twists, and the actors were all blank slates making it very enjoyable to see the characters grown from scratch instead of haloween costumes tacked-on too of megastars. Give it time–I think Jason Statham (star of The Transporter) is on the rise, and he’s only going to get more popular. I think he’s a great leading man–he can be deadly serious, he looks the part for “action hero” (or villain) roles, he can be quite funny, he is a trained martial artist, he has a cool accent, and he’s another cool guy who just happens to be balding (like Bruce Willis). He has roles in Guy Ritchie’s two British crime caper comedies Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, he appears in The Italian Job remake, and I think he plays a villain in Cellular, but I haven’t seen it yet. Plus, The Transporter 2 is in the works. I think The Transporter was one of the best action movies of recent years that wasn’t a “straight” martial arts film, or contained superheroes or sci-fi elements. Sorry to hijack the thread. Hey, how about Jason Statham as a sardonic, tough-as-nails Han Solo? ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/35 "2005-05-19T20:39:50Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > Or possibly redirected by Quentin Tarantino. Or David Lynch. > [@](#): > > Luke: You knew my father? > > [screen to extended closeup of condenser unit for five minutes] > > Obi Wan [played by [Michael J. Anderson](http://graphics.jsonline.com/graphics/owlive/img/sep03/carnivale0914_big.jpg): [one minute close-up of his silent lips, then] Yes. He was my student. [insert danse macabre] > > [knock on door- closeup of door, sound of water dripping] > > [an android enters, voiced by Helen Mirren] > Luke _is_ the Kwazir Haderach! > > Obi Wan: Wrong movie. > > [cut to extended scene of six breasted lesbian strippers slow dancing on a bar in Mos Eisley.] ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/36 "2005-05-19T20:50:37Z")
I only have one, Scarlett Johanssen for Leia…or Luke, Or Ha, or C-3PO or anything…in factthe whole movie can just be Scarlett Johanssen making bread for all I care. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/37 "2005-05-19T21:12:52Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > I only have one, Scarlett Johanssen for Leia…or Luke, Or Ha, or C-3PO or anything…in factthe whole movie can just be Scarlett Johanssen making bread for all I care. Scarlett would be the perfect Leia. Frankly, Steve Buscemi would be great as Lando Calrissian, especially if Tarantino directed. Of course, then Michael Madsen would play Vader and smoke cigarettes, and Lucy Liu would be Hana Solo. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/38 "2005-05-19T21:16:02Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > in factthe whole movie can just be Scarlett Johanssen making bread for all I care. That certainly would have improved _Lost in Translation_. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/39 "2005-05-19T21:28:46Z")
> [@Patty O'Furniture](#): > > > [@](#): > > > > …tacked-on too of megastars. > > Not sure what I’m trying to say here… Tatooine has twin suns? ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537/40 "2005-05-19T23:10:26Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > I’m working on a list, but right now all I got is Robin Williams as Chewbacca (he’s hairy enough!) I see Robin Williams as more of an ewok. Pat Morita as Yoda Rosie O’Donnell as Jabbina the Hutt _(and just to piss off fanboys whose hero is so badass he gets accidentally killed by a blind guy)_ Carrot Top as Boba Fett 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recast-the-original-star-wars-movies-for-a-hypothetical-remake/304537.md?page=3)