# Recently widowed: what do I gotta do? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 9, 2013, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421 "2013-09-09T16:22:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2013, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421/41 "2013-09-10T12:17:25Z")
> [@actualliberalnotoneofthose](#): > > When my Mother died, my Father paid off thousand$ in credit card debt (which was mostly kept secret from him). He later found out from his attorney that he did not need to pay any of it. > > So I definitely would not follow any advice to just go ahead and pay credit card debt or even attempt to negotiate it at all. There might not be any debt to pay or negotiate. We paid most of my brother in laws debt out of the estate because it was “the right thing to do.” The exceptions were the vultures. Anyone who threatened (fine, turn it over to collections, his credit rating will suffer - so?), didn’t drop the late fees (he died, and until the probate was wrapped up, we couldn’t pay bills), wouldn’t cancel a contract on date of death (cellphone company) got told to jump in the fucking lake - that I was under no obligation to pay the bills at all. This was one of the advantages of having me - a connected party - but one without my emotions so close - take care of the bill. But his situation was different as he wasn’t married. And state laws vary. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2013, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421/42 "2013-09-10T12:34:26Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > I want to third getting multiple copies of the death certificate. I don’t know about Texas, but when my father died here in Arizona, I could get copies from the funeral home up to 30 days after his death. After that, I had to order them from the state at $20 per copy. +1 on this. You will need more copies than you think and paying for them later is something that can easily be avoided. When you go to the funreal home, don’t go by yourself. Based purely on personal experience, a friend is better than family, but either is a whole lot better than no one. Let your friends help you out. You’ll be eating a lot of chicken soup and potato casserole for the next few weeks, but that’s not a bad thing. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2013, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421/43 "2013-09-10T14:24:06Z")
I should look through my files - but I think we only ordered ten death certificates and still have two left more than a year later. So, yes, you’ll need more than one - but you may not need 20 - and they do get expensive. Anywhere local (like the bank) we could show them the death certificate and they’d notarize a form. But we didn’t have a whole lot of accounts to worry about. (I think Comcast was on the naughty list) ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2013, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421/44 "2013-09-10T14:39:22Z")
> [@aceplace57](#): > > Mom sold dad’s truck and got a rebate on her auto insurance. She had just renewed it for both vehicles a few weeks before he passed. So it was a significant rebate. This one’s worth highlighting. Nobody else mentioned it that I saw. If he was able to drive, call your car insurance company as soon as you can to get him taken off the policy. My wife couldn’t drive because of a stroke, so there was obviously no death certificate, and they took me at my word. I bet they take you at your word - after all, the consequences of someone driving who doesn’t have insurance would be enough deterrent. Like \*\*aceplace57 \*\*said, you get a rebate for whatever’s left on the term. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2013, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421/45 "2013-09-10T17:36:40Z")
One more bit of advice - don’t take his name off any joint bank accounts for at least a year if there is any chance that you may receive a check made out to him. It makes it much easier to deposit the check if his name is still on the account. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recently-widowed-what-do-i-gotta-do/668421.md?page=2)