# Recommend a good facial hair softener

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [February 13, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276 "2006-02-13T15:35:28Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Grossbottom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ba8739/32.png) [@Grossbottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grossbottom)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276/1 "2006-02-13T15:35:28Z")

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I like my goatee. She doesn’t.

I usually condition it with regular conditioner in the shower, then pat on some cdecent clove oil I found years ago, but I’m wondering if anyone has a line on anything really good.

Help save my goatee, please, I beg you.

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**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276/2 "2006-02-13T15:54:31Z")

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Well, conditioner helps, but so does outgrowth of the beard. My husband has a long beard and it’s very soft. It’s those 3-4 days growth ones that’ll kill ya.

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**Author:** ![Imasquare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Imasquare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imasquare)\
**Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276/3 "2006-02-13T23:29:16Z")

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Zumenon - ie Oestrogen

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**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2006, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276/4 "2006-02-14T00:02:25Z")

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> [@Grossbottom](#):
>
> I like my goatee. She doesn’t.

Sorry mate, you can’t win this one.

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**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2006, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-good-facial-hair-softener/344276/5 "2006-02-14T16:59:25Z")

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Comic strip character Opal Pickles, talking about Earl’s moustache, said, “A kiss without a tickle isn’t worth a nickel.” Obviously, your lady disagrees.

Your beard hair is thicker and scratchier than your scalp hair. Try applying hand lotion two or three times a day.