# Recommend a movie critic! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 26, 2001, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216 "2001-08-26T19:18:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![MonkeyMensch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@MonkeyMensch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMensch)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/21 "2001-08-29T00:03:05Z")
I’m partial to Duncan Shepard at [www.sdreader.com](http://www.sdreader.com). He’s _very_ strict about what he likes, but over the years I have developed an interpretation of his “star” rating method. - : Average Hollywood output; an OK evening at the movies. \*\* : Worth going out of your way to seeing. \*\*\*: Exceptional; a truly memorable movie. Apparently he does have four and five star movies but I’ve never seen 'em. The good thing is he is very consistent, so when I read a review I know where I stand in terms of wanting to see a movie or not. And **Smeg** , God bless the negative correlation movie reviewers. I’ve used more than a few of them through the years… ---
**Author:** ![labdude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5fc32e/32.png) [@labdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/labdude)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/22 "2001-08-29T00:22:35Z")
> **[Film Threat | Your Independent Movie Guide](https://filmthreat.com/)** > > Rated one of the top independent film review sites worldwide specializing in movie news, filmmaker interviews, film festival coverage and indie DIY how-tos ---
**Author:** ![Baraqiyal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@Baraqiyal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baraqiyal)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/23 "2001-08-29T00:32:30Z")
I often read the Filthy Critic. His reviews are mean spirited and laced with profanity, but also very funny. Here’s what he said about Brando’s performance in the score: _He does nothing but waddle around, breathe heavily, sweat and mumble. Any time I want to see that all I need to do is spill some jelly beans down the clearance aisle at Hancock Fabrics._ In his current review, “Curse of the Jade Scorpion”, he makes fun of his own sponsors. I can’t figure out if his working class act is real or not ---
**Author:** ![Baraqiyal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecccb3/32.png) [@Baraqiyal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baraqiyal)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/24 "2001-08-29T00:35:33Z")
[The Filthy Critic](http://www.bigempire.com/filthy/) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Bitterdrunk\_Kid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/278dde/32.png) [@The\_Bitterdrunk\_Kid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Bitterdrunk_Kid)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/25 "2001-08-29T00:47:21Z")
_He does nothing but waddle around, breathe heavily, sweat and mumble. Any time I want to see that all I need to do is spill some jelly beans down the clearance aisle at Hancock Fabrics._ Sounds like Don Imus! ---
**Author:** ![pesch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pesch/32/4925_2.png) [@pesch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pesch)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/26 "2001-08-29T01:50:00Z")
Rita Kempley at the Washington Post. Even if you disagree with her, her reviews are entertaining. ---
**Author:** ![DMC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dmc/32/18049_2.png) [@DMC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMC)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/27 "2001-08-29T07:55:41Z")
As for reviewers worth avoiding, Joel Siegel seems to have never seen a movie that wasn’t worthy of raving taglines. ---
**Author:** ![ModernRonin2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c37758/32.png) [@ModernRonin2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ModernRonin2)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2001, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/28 "2001-08-29T22:21:33Z")
I also like [http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com](http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com) (You think I’m making this up, don’t you? Heh.) -Ben ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/29 "2001-08-30T00:20:33Z")
Moving this puppy to our new forum, Cafe Society. ---
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/30 "2001-08-30T01:06:27Z")
The problemI find with most reviewers is they say Movie X sucked or movie Y was great but they don’t say why and if they do say why movie X sucked they don’t say what the filmmakers could have done to improve the problems. In short they don’t offer constructive criticism, just criticism. The only 2 I’ve found who actually offer thoughtful, constructive critiques of movies are Roger Ebert and our very own **Cervaise.** Ebert in particular often echoes my own views in his reviews and even when we completely disagree I can always see his point anyway. Very good reviewer. Also, check out Cervaises review of Battlefield Earth. It’s hysterical 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Revedge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecae2f/32.png) [@Revedge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revedge)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/31 "2001-08-30T04:53:05Z")
If you like Ebert, check out the DVD of Dark City. The alternate soundtrack is his scene by scene and shot by shot analysis of this film. It is incredibly astute. You wil have a greater appreciation of the insight he brings to his reviews. ---
**Author:** ![silent\_rob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@silent\_rob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silent_rob)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/32 "2001-08-30T07:45:32Z")
Ebert is probably the only critic that I check out on a regular basis and usually agree with. The main thing that I enjoy about Ebert’s reviews is that he really understands genre. Now, even though I dislike genre in flicks (which usually leads to formula pictures), I like how he won’t compare a comedy to a drama, or a drama to a kung-fu flick. A lot of critics just don’t generally like comedies, for instance, and thus give them low ratings because of that. He’ll review them for what they are and won’t try to enforce a unifying theory of movies on them (ie. a comedy might not hold up to _The Godfather_, but it still might be damn funny, and is good for that reason). ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/33 "2001-08-30T13:02:25Z")
Ebert in his younger day was fairly reliable, I found. If he liked something, then it was sure to be pretentious, overblown, boring, and pseudo-“arty.” So I always knew that if he liked something, I wouldn’t. Alas, he couldn’t be relied on the other way, just because he disliked something was not a reliable guide. In his old age, sadly, he’s become erratic and he occasionally likes films that I do, too. ---
**Author:** ![Wumpus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8c91f0/32.png) [@Wumpus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wumpus)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/34 "2001-08-30T18:14:14Z")
CK, if you think Ebert is too artsy, I can only guess your opinion of Gene Siskel! For those wanting to sample a large range of different critics, see > **[Rotten Tomatoes: Movies | TV Shows | Movie Trailers | Reviews](https://www.rottentomatoes.com/)** > > Rotten Tomatoes, home of the Tomatometer, is the most trusted measurement of quality for Movies & TV. The definitive site for Reviews, Trailers, Showtimes, and Tickets ---
**Author:** ![Danimal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bb73d2/32.png) [@Danimal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danimal)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/35 "2001-08-30T18:20:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MsWhatsit \* > \*\*James Berardinelli ([http://movie-reviews.colossus.net/](http://movie-reviews.colossus.net/)) is a great reviewer. His reviews are always good reading. Even when I disagree with what he has to say, I still enjoy reading the review. He’s a great writer. \*\* I like Berardinelli too. I also like Bams from Three Black Chicks. IMO, Ebert is a better writer than a reviewer. His reviews are always entertaining to read, but I find them poor guides on what to expect from the movie. ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2001, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/36 "2001-08-30T21:29:41Z")
Scott Tobias, Nathan Rabin, Joshua Klein and Keith Phipps all do a fine job the [The Onion’s A.V. Club](http://www.theonionavclub.com/avclub3730/cinema3730.html). I read 'em faithfully. ---
**Author:** ![lopati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c67d28/32.png) [@lopati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lopati)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2001, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/37 "2001-09-06T02:20:17Z")
jonathan rosenbaum of the chicago reader ([http://www.chireader.com/movies/](http://www.chireader.com/movies/)) and harvey s. karten’s newsgroup reviews ([http://us.imdb.com/ReviewsBy?Harvey+S.+Karten](http://us.imdb.com/ReviewsBy?Harvey+S.+Karten)) are also good. ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2001, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/38 "2001-09-06T12:58:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ModernRonin2 \* > \*\* > I also like [http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com](http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com) > > (You think I’m making this up, don’t you? Heh.) > > \*\* I really hate Hollywood Bitchslap. I went there with promises of it being a sort of “alternative” review site, where the just gave the straight-up facts bout the movies. no dice, it’s the same crap you see everywhere else. A few months ago their lowest rated movie was two stars. Now, your opinion on what it might be will differ, but I’m certain everyone here can think of a one star or 0 star movie this summer. It’s the same grade inflation, the same defending of shitty movies, the same pandering to the studios as everywhere else. I agree with whoever said the Onion’s reviews are good. They really are, and they do tend to go into a little more details about why a movie was bad or good. ---
**Author:** ![VarlosZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d78d45/32.png) [@VarlosZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VarlosZ)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216/39 "2001-09-08T01:20:14Z")
I’ll second the Onion A.V. Club. Very reliable and enjoyable, I find. I hate Owen Gleiberman of Entertainment Weekly. Peter Travers of Rolling Stone declares every fucking movie he sees “an American classic!” The New York _Times_ has gotten pedestrian. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/recommend-a-movie-critic/78216.md?page=1)