# Rectum? Damn near killed him! What's the set up? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 25, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103 "2005-07-25T20:06:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/21 "2024-06-21T02:35:11Z")
Zombie! I was going to post this quote in the Name an obscure line from a movie, and googled it, and this thread came up. I would’ve sworn this was said by Chris Farley in a movie. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/22 "2024-06-21T06:09:52Z")
_Black Sheep_ I think. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYqpeRlyLOo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYqpeRlyLOo) ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/23 "2024-06-21T07:08:51Z")
[deleted -redundant] ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/24 "2024-06-21T11:45:29Z")
To add a variant: the Yorkshire comedian Les Dawson once had a sketch of two ladies of a certain age at the doctor’s, and one asks the other “Is it the old problem - like last year when you thought might to have a hysterical rectum?” [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/I-btIQv2mrY/maxresdefault.jpg "Comedy Les Dawson Cissie and Ada At the Doctor's Surgery") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-btIQv2mrY&t=34) ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/25 "2024-06-21T12:50:11Z")
Didja hear about the butcher who backed into his meat grinder? Wrecked 'em. Dijda hear about his customer who came over to help him & backed into it herself? Disassed her ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2024, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/26 "2024-06-21T18:43:15Z")
I first heard it as a child in the 50’s and it was indeed a “Little Johnny” joke. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2024, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/27 "2024-06-22T12:36:00Z")
“Did you hear so-and-so was in a pretty bad car crash? And he wasn’t wearing a seat belt. He wound up bouncing around in the car, and the gear shift went into his… his…” ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2024, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/28 "2024-06-27T22:06:12Z")
The one I heard at Girl Scout camp meandered a bit. There was a pet monkey following Johnny to school. Johnny tried several things to make the monkey go home, but it didn’t work. He gave up, really, but kept tossing rocks, now and then, which make the monkey back up a bit. Johnny crossed a street and the monkey crossed a little later. It was hit by a car and went way, way up in the sky. Then it arced a bit and came down, down, down. And it hit a telephone pole. The pole went way up his asshole. Insert teacher’s comment and the punchline. ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2024, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103/29 "2024-06-27T22:36:01Z")
I want a shirt that says this [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rectum-damn-near-killed-him-whats-the-set-up/314103.md?page=1)