As I said, it’s never happened to me, but if it did, I like to think I wouldn’t immediately come to conclusions like “people are shit” or that I work with “greedy fuckheads”. I like to think I’d give the supposed thief the benefit of the doubt unless I had proof it was actually stolen in the first place. Maybe I misplaced the damn thing or it got tossed by accident. Even if my lunch did get stolen, I’ve got bigger problems. Any rate, I’d rather work with a petty thief than somebody who sounds like they’re two mailbags away from a shooting spree.
I once worked with a woman who left a container of spaghetti with one very large meatball on top. She pulled it out to have for lunch the next day and someone had eaten the meatball - leaving a large indentation on the spaghetti.
This happened some 4 years before I started at the company and it’s still legendary 9 years later.
After I had gastric bypass surgery, I drank a lot of a protein drink called “Achieve 1”. It came in a glass bottle that, if you weren’t paying attention (or if, say, you were stealing it from the company refrigerator) highly resembled a Starbucks Frappuccino bottle.
I had them stolen a few times until people realized how revoltingly gross they were to someone who didn’t need to drink them for required protein intake. I often wished I could have been there when they took that first swig. 
UT
Well no duh dude, but you’re damning with faint praise here. Its still no excuse for food thievery in a closed, supposedly team-oriented corporate environment.
People who steal food from coworkers usually steal other things as well. That small change people keep for the vending machine? Its gone when you want to get a soda.
The spare toilet paper…forget about it and wipe yourself with paper towells.
And don’t think that you can keep forks unless they are under lock and key.
Thanks all the gods that SG is no longer using up all the condiments and not telling anyone that we need to buy more.
Like overlyverbose said, I just don’t have much regard for how most folks season and prep their home food. And I am not a big fan of reheating refrigerated food at work in the communal microwave, and I hate the cold sandwich for lunch as well. So I’m highly unlikely to bring a lunch and even less to eat someone else’s.
The folks at Subway have to wear gloves and hairnets to serve the food I buy. Co-worker might be digging his/her ass, nose, and/or ear as they prep the lunch. They could sneeze on it, or just finished masturbating or having sex without washing their hands.
I have to know you really well to eat your food!
Aside from it being stealing and a really scummy thing to do, I would worry about noxious substances less than unknowingly ingesting my coworkers’ sex juices or snot. Hell, I don’t even like people touching my food with their hands at a potluck!
Food thieves must have the ability to put these things out of their minds…
Reported.