# Regrets **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 11, 2013, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833 "2013-01-11T05:57:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2013, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/21 "2013-01-11T22:54:21Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Actually, there is no such thing as now. Everything you know is a memory. Maybe a very fresh memory, like a quarter second or so, but a memory nonetheless of imperfectly perceived data imperfectly stored and imperfectly recalled. In fact, there’s very little to support an assertion that any memories you have are in any way indicative of the actual physical experiences of your body. Or that they ever happened at all. And that you’re not already in a looped memory in which every instant feels like “now” even though you’ve lived it countless times. So…maybe the world has already been gone around? I would recommend avoiding the memory of banging your head against the wall to fall asleep–gives me funny dreams. I think. That’s an interesting viewpoint. To me it seems there must be some infinitesimal point of time in which the moving finger is writing. Perhaps the real koan is “how long is now?” ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/22 "2013-01-11T22:57:51Z")
> [@HoneyBadgerDC](#): > > Life is so relative, I fucked up at every turn and never looked back. Marriages, career, business. I started getting my shit together at about age 40 and have done ok. I am now retired, financialy secure and stable but far from wealthy. If I thought about it I am sure I would have regrets but **I tend to fucus on today** and tomorrow remembering only the lessons from yesterday. I know this is just a typo, but as a former oceanographer, I may adopt \*“[Fucus](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fucus) on today” \*as my personal motto. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2013, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/23 "2013-01-11T23:09:48Z")
You giving me the finger?:mad: I’ve gotten you! ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2013, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/24 "2013-01-11T23:21:14Z")
The only regret that pops into my mind is that (too) many times I didn’t ask a woman out for fear of being embarrassed. Who knows how many good relationships I’ve missed? ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2013, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/25 "2013-01-11T23:33:54Z")
My life sucks and always has. I can’t say I really regret anything because there’s nothing I could’ve really done to make it any different. ---
**Author:** ![Noel\_Prosequi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b19c9b/32.png) [@Noel\_Prosequi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noel_Prosequi)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/26 "2013-01-14T07:08:19Z")
Don’t fall into the trap of idealising the decisions you_didn’t_ make. Any decision you _did_ make can now be seen with the hindsight of perfect information. But the sneakiness of decisions not made is that you can pretend that, had you made that choice, you’d now be rock star with a diamond car with platinum wheels. Bullshit. If you’d been more social, you might well have fallen into a series of unsatisfying temporary hook-ups that led nowhere except two divorces, broke from alimony and you getting the clap and your dong dropping off. You’re waaaay better off than that. I guess the point is that there is nothing to be gained by regretting choices - you can’t really compare your life now with what it might have been on the principle behind the movie Sliding Doors because you have no way of knowing how any other choices would have worked out. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/27 "2013-01-14T08:09:43Z")
There are a lot of people who, when asked “If you could change anything in your past, what would it be?” and their cop-out answer is to say they wouldn’t change anything because then they wouldn’t have met their wonderful spouse and had their wonderful kids\*. Except they would have met someone else equally as wonderful, and then likely had other wonderful kids. I blame the misunderstanding of the Trousers of Time. \*Except for Jimmy. That kid’s trouble. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/28 "2013-01-14T09:08:27Z")
**Inigo Montoya** how about “perfectly deranged data to fit your focus?” As I continue to grow (up) I’ve found that my regrets have changed over the years, depending on what phase I’m in. Right now I’ve reached the point where I really do regret most the things I didn’t do, didn’t try, didn’t fail brilliantly at. I’m in my sixties. This sounds like something somebody near the end would say. I could crap out at any time. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/29 "2013-01-14T10:13:10Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > The only regret that pops into my mind is that (too) many times I didn’t ask a woman out for fear of being embarrassed. Who knows how many good relationships I’ve missed? On the other hand, how many bad break ups have you missed? 🙂 Can’t have one without the other. Me, I’m bummed that I have had a mild depression for years. But then again, I think life has treated me well in general. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2013, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/30 "2013-01-15T01:27:51Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > You giving me the finger?:mad: I’ve gotten you! I’m not giving you the finger. Also, I didn’t kill your father. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2013, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833/31 "2013-01-15T02:05:01Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > My life sucks and always has. I can’t say I really regret anything because there’s nothing I could’ve really done to make it any different. None of this seems likely to me. > [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#): > > I’m not giving you the finger. Also, I didn’t kill your father. Do you have any proof of that? :dubious: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/regrets/646833.md?page=1)