# Relationships in heaven **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [October 14, 2010, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091 "2010-10-14T04:50:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/41 "2010-10-16T15:58:42Z")
> [@Susanann](#): > > > [@Rhodes](#): > > > > Yes. > > …so…if the woman is eternally pregnant/or in labor forever and forever in Mormon Heaven, > > then what is Mormom Hell like? Right now there’s what you’d call Heaven and Hell where Heaven is like a really nice lobby and Hell is a prison. People in Heaven can apparently visit their friends serving sentences in Hell. Once Jesus comes back there won’t be a Hell anymore- just Heaven. That’s how my Mormon friend tried to explain it to me, anyway. According to him as long as you’re a good person you’ll get to go to Heaven, just not as nice of a Heaven as the Mormons. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2010, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/42 "2010-10-16T21:20:13Z")
> [@copperwindow](#): > > If Emily (my wife) dies and I remarry to sussie and we both die, who will I be with in heaven? That is based on the assumption that there is a heaven of some sort. And we all know what happens when you assume something. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2010, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/43 "2010-10-16T21:30:17Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > That is based on the assumption that there is a heaven of some sort. And we all know what happens when you assume something. Something about being sorted out with the lambs or goats, as I recall. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2010, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/44 "2010-10-16T23:04:46Z")
Eh. I want to see my grandmother in heaven, and all my pets. I want to feel happy, loved, carefree, as I was as a child, in heaven, which is a bright, infinite place full of God’s love, all pain and anxiety and earthly woes gone. Jabbing penises have no place in my heaven. Don’t know about hell, I swear there’s already plenty of hell on earth. What about purgatory? What’s purgatory like? Stuck in gridlock traffic? Open house night at the high school? Waiting in line at the grocery on a Saturday on triple coupon day, lol? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2010, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/45 "2010-10-16T23:26:39Z")
Well, there’ll be no more tears in Heaven, that’s right. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![copperwindow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@copperwindow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/copperwindow)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/46 "2010-10-17T01:57:24Z")
I heard that heaven was a place on earth. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/47 "2010-10-17T03:47:36Z")
> [@copperwindow](#): > > If Emily (my wife) dies and I remarry to sussie and we both die, who will I be with in heaven? That’s when God tells you that the polyamorous folks were right all along 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/48 "2010-10-17T14:55:43Z")
> [@Susanann](#): > > > [@Rhodes](#): > > > > Yes. > > …so…if the woman is eternally pregnant/or in labor forever and forever in Mormon Heaven, > > then what is Mormom Hell like? Thank you! I’ll email this to my also ex-mormon sister. The answer to the OP is with both women. Mormons practice polygyny in heaven, so a man can be married to a woman, then if the wife dies or is divorced, then he can can get married again and will be with the second wife as well. Rinse and repeat. Civil divorces do not cancel temple weddings, so divorced women can expect to be together with their ex-husbands again, even if they have remarried and even if they have children with their new husbands. Unless they get the temple wedding annulled. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/49 "2010-10-17T15:08:09Z")
> [@TokyoPlayer](#): > > > [@Susanann](#): > > > > …so…if the woman is eternally pregnant/or in labor forever and forever in Mormon Heaven, > > > > then what is Mormom Hell like? > > Thank you! I’ll email this to my also ex-mormon sister. > > The answer to the OP is with both women. Mormons practice polygyny in heaven, so a man can be married to a woman, then if the wife dies or is divorced, then he can can get married again and will be with the second wife as well. Rinse and repeat. What if it’s the husband who dies? Let me guess: She isn’t expected to be remarried? Only the first husband counts? Somehow I can’t imagine Mormons accepting wives with multiple husbands in the afterlife. ---
**Author:** ![copperwindow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@copperwindow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/copperwindow)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/50 "2010-10-17T17:18:11Z")
> [@TokyoPlayer](#): > > The answer to the OP is with both women. Mormons practice polygyny in heaven, so a man can be married to a woman, then if the wife dies or is divorced, then he can can get married again and will be with the second wife as well. Rinse and repeat. Will Emily and the new wife feel like they will have to battle for my affection? ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/51 "2010-10-17T18:10:01Z")
Do Mormon wedding vows lack the traditional expiration date? ---
**Author:** ![Fred\_Garvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c67d28/32.png) [@Fred\_Garvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fred_Garvin)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2010, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/52 "2010-10-17T19:03:57Z")
As Larry David pointed out to his wife: “Till Death Do Us Part” Once the Grim Reaper comes, you’re an unrestricted free agent ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/53 "2010-10-18T01:34:45Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > What if it’s the husband who dies? Let me guess: She isn’t expected to be remarried? Only the first husband counts? Somehow I can’t imagine Mormons accepting wives with multiple husbands in the afterlife. The woman can get remarried, but “for time only” which means for this life and not for the next life. Any children she has with the new husband will go with her to the previous husband. So, if a woman escapes a horrible marriage without kids, marries a terrific man and has kids with him, but doesn’t get a temple annulment and subsequent temple marriage, then the new husband is SOL in the next world, and gets to watch the jerk be with his kids. > [@copperwindow](#): > > Will Emily and the new wife feel like they will have to battle for my affection? Only if they have time while they aren’t being pregnant with the billions and billions of souls who will become their spirit children in the new world in which you and your wives will be god and goddesses of. Once the spirit babies are created, though, it’s not clear what the purpose of women are in heaven. Men seem to have all the real jobs. > [@spark240](#): > > Do Mormon wedding vows lack the traditional expiration date? Yes. It’s for time (see above) and all eternity. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/54 "2010-10-18T12:41:22Z")
> [@TokyoPlayer](#): > > So, if a woman escapes a horrible marriage without kids, marries a terrific man and has kids with him, but doesn’t get a temple annulment and subsequent temple marriage, then the new husband is SOL in the next world, and gets to watch the jerk be with his kids. Does this mean that in heaven I’m going to be sharing a domain with all my ancestors? In which case does that mean we’ll all be in the same domain because we all have Adam and Eve as our ancestors? ---
**Author:** ![Rhodes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhodes/32/273_2.png) [@Rhodes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhodes)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/55 "2010-10-18T14:37:45Z")
Yup, these descriptions of Mormon Heaven sound just about right. But apparently there will be no suffering to go along with the bearing of billions of “spirit children.” Resurrected Mormon women become godesses tasked with populating their own world, with the help of their husband and his other wives. Technically, in the big Revelation of Joseph Smith that describes eternal relationships, temple marriage is not the “new and everlasting covenant” - that’s polygamous marriage. But now that mainstream Mormons forbid polygamy, they pretend that Doctrine and Covenants section 132 is referring to temple marriages. Men who have received all their temple ordinances are in the highest heaven to become gods with all their wives. Mormon weddings for “eternity” do not contain the phrase such as “til death do us part” or “as long as you both shall live.” I assume that weddings for “time only” (for less worthy couples, or situations where the woman already has an eternal husband) contain one of these phrases, but I’ve only been to one of these and I don’t remember. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091/56 "2010-10-20T14:11:02Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Does this mean that in heaven I’m going to be sharing a domain with all my ancestors? In which case does that mean we’ll all be in the same domain because we all have Adam and Eve as our ancestors? Eventually men and their (plural) wives each get their own worlds to populate, but they talk about being with their families in heaven, so it may be that the being together is an intern step. They never developed the details and the Mormon church is really trying to downplay this doctrine now. The former president of the church and prophet of God, denied to Larry King that the church knows much about it, and wasn’t clear if it’s still being taught. A Mormon poster here has declared that she wouldn’t be surprised if this teaching wasn’t divine. > [@Rhodes](#): > > Technically, in the big Revelation of Joseph Smith that describes eternal relationships, temple marriage is not the “new and everlasting covenant” - that’s polygamous marriage. But now that mainstream Mormons forbid polygamy, they pretend that Doctrine and Covenants section 132 is referring to temple marriages. Men who have received all their temple ordinances are in the highest heaven to become gods with all their wives. The whole thing with the temple, including marriage, the funny underwear and the recently removed death penalties for breaching the secrecy of the temple is tied up with polygamy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/relationships-in-heaven/557091.md?page=2)