# Religious Dopers: When Do You Let Your Kids Opt Out **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 25, 2019, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624 "2019-07-25T17:44:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/81 "2019-08-02T03:04:52Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > For day to day stuff I imagine they’re all the same. There’s decent people who don’t wear their religion on their sleeve because they’re secure enough spiritually, and there are atheists who don’t talk about religion because it genuinely never occurs to them to talk about something they don’t believe is real…and then there are the proselytizers on both sides. Nobody likes _them_ very much, and it has only to do with their belief that they have a right to tell someone else what to think. The last time I had much of a discussion with an atheist was while I was in the hotel bar while at a convention. He felt the need to promote his atheism and was surprised when I seemed interested and knew much about it. Of course he was on his 3rd drink of the night and had been really dropping big money in the bar every night. What is it about atheists that makes them want to drink so much? Anyways when he didnt get the reaction he wanted he dropped the subject. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/82 "2019-08-02T03:07:20Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > Whereas I refrain from commenting because I have better things to do than get into fights with these people. When I hang out with people, I’m trying to enjoy myself! > > There are a number of specific reasons that christianity gets all the love and attention around here, and not all of it is just exposure. But _that_ is a subject for a different thread. Well just when atheists have done away with Christians, another religion will come along. How are you all handling new agers, wiccans, and satanists? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/83 "2019-08-02T03:58:16Z")
> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#): > > “Suzanne” and “One Toke Over the Line” were among our favorites. “Suzanne” by what artist? I once heard “One Toke…” on Muzak. 😛 And then there’s this. [![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/t8tdmaEhMHE/hqdefault.jpg "One Toke Over The Line - Lawrence Welk - WTF! (1971)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8tdmaEhMHE&t=78s) ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/84 "2019-08-02T04:41:36Z")
> [@kopek](#): > > Helped raise a couple cousins so no kids and besides my answer is actually “other” which is how I voted. When they can explain in some sense why they would rather skip it I am cool with them doing so. Beyond the basic “I want to sleep in” of course. Articulate you thought process and I can support it. This was Dad’s basic methodology for anything, including allowing me out of Catechesis because “we’re doing the same material at school, only in school it’s 3h/wk with an actual grade and here it’s 1h/wk for nothing but missing the Saturday afternoon movie :p”. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/85 "2019-08-02T05:15:22Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > Religious activity for _me_ equals a massive amount of time flushed down a very stinky toilet - tempered for the nontrivial stretches of time I spent utterly dead to the (stinky) world around me due to being enclosed in a book orders of magnitude better than anything going on around me. Yeeah… this seems far more about you projecting your religious experiences as opposed to any future kids of mine attending a very progressive congregation, in a progressive denomination, which promotes questioning and discussion. > [@](#): > > You haven’t tried this with religion. Religion is different. People invest their _lives_ in their religion. Attacks on the religion are attacks on _them_. And people aren’t stupid - even the simplest, most innocuous of probing questions are interpreted as attacks and met with instant defensiveness and hostility. Hi. I’m a faithful Lutheran who has atheist friends. We have debated religion. Generally the folks that want to be assholes about it (well if so they may not remain friends for too long) end up exasperated when I enthusiastically agree with them that my faith is indeed completely irrational - like they expected me to get angry with them (another strike of being assholish). > [@](#): > > If I ever wanted to _destroy_ a friendship with somebody, I’d dismantle their religion in front of them. Yes, because you choose to be an asshole to them. If I ever wanted to destroy a friendship with somebody, I’d dismantle their political beliefs in front of them or Hell, even their favorite show. Attempting to dismantling anything anyone holds dear shows a complete lack of respect for them as a person, so yeah, you’d lose that friendship. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/86 "2019-08-02T09:10:19Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > IMHO, the reason for this is that some Christian parents/grandparents cannot recognize the difference between being Christian on the outside and Christian on the inside. They think that if you enforce the outward symptoms (reading the Bible, going to church, praying, abiding by certain behaviors or expectations,) that the inward change will happen accordingly. When in fact the exact opposite often happens as a backlash. And then, when the children do rebel against Christianity, these parents/grandparents think, “This child is rebelling _ **in spite of h** _ow hard we have dragged him/her to church,” never thinking, “this child is rebelling \*\*_because of_ \*\*how hard we dragged him/her to church.” > > It’s like forcing someone to sit down and watch three hours of baseball every week whether they want to or not. Sure, it might convert them into a baseball fan, but then it might also make them utterly hate the sport. > > I grew up in a home where exhibiting the outward signs of Christianity was basically non-optional. It didn’t make me leave the faith, but it certainly did not help. My mother’s rebellion against her parents took the form of becoming more-churchy-than-thou: Grandpa would have been a card-carrying church-burner if such an activity came with cards, Grandma liked to celebrate St Lucy but otherwise only set foot in a church if food was involved (and no, hosts don’t count). I’m expecting that The Oldest Nephew and The Niece will eventually become atheistic punks, based on how square their parents are raising them. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/87 "2019-08-02T11:41:41Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > “Suzanne” by what artist? > > I once heard “One Toke…” on Muzak. 😛 And then there’s this. > > [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8tdmaEhMHE&t=78s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8tdmaEhMHE&t=78s) Leonard Cohen, I’ve been listening to him for so long I forget some folks haven’t. It’s a great song that mixes religious and hippie sex imagery. ETA — OMG, that link is hysterical. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/88 "2019-08-02T12:24:55Z")
[Here](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=20288675&postcount=218) is something I posted a couple of years ago that might give you an idea of the effect forced church-going had on me. > [@](#): > > This is a dumb one, but I guess this is the only place I can vent where someone might “get it”. > > My mom wants me to go to church with the family on my grandmother’s 90th birthday. > > Y’all may not know this, but I have a **Der-Trihs** -sized problem with religion. A couple of years ago, after attending a service under similar duress, I left boiling with anger and vowed to never go to church again. I understand that these are not bad people, and it’s all my own issue, but it is real. My mother would feel the same if I asked her to attend a Hilary Clinton rally. It is _The Thing I Cannot Do_. > > If I don’t go, I’ll be deemed petty and selfish and branded as the family asshole forever (or until someone else takes the title). > > If I do go, I will be filled with rage, because that is the effect church services have on me. Not to mention breaking the promise I made to myself for no good reason. > > Grandma will not know if I’m there or not, she is not that tuned in to reality anymore. She’d be just as happy if I told her I was there, but sat in the back. > > I think I have to do this. I’m trying to make myself do this. I’m considering ear plugs, or bringing a Kindle, or taking drugs. > > How do you deal with irrational anger? ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/89 "2019-08-02T13:01:00Z")
I’d consider myself devoutly religious, but it’s been years since I’ve belonged to a church. So there isn’t anything for the Firebug to opt out of. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/90 "2019-08-02T13:21:02Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > What is it about atheists that makes them want to drink so much? Do you know about confirmation bias? I’m an atheist and I sure do love to drink. The thing is, the other drinkers/alcoholics who I talk to overwhelmingly are religious. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/91 "2019-08-02T14:05:41Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > This again sounds like forcing something down kids’ throats, wishfully hoping for the best, and then washing one’s hands of the responsibility when they dislike it. I’m their father - forcing things down their throat and hoping for the best is in the job description. That’s hyperbole, in case anyone was wondering. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/92 "2019-08-02T15:12:04Z")
Well throw this back on the atheists. Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/93 "2019-08-02T15:30:22Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well throw this back on the atheists. > > Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) > Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. > > How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? I’d be fine with it. BTW, Christians are not what I hate most in the world. (That would be Trump voters.) ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/94 "2019-08-02T15:36:53Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well throw this back on the atheists. > > Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) > Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. > > How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? Well it’d probably be more of what if their 12 year old kid was best friends with my kid and wanted to come to our church. Though it reminds me of an interesting story. The current President of our Church Council is very liberal lady. Progressive on a bevy of issues from government assistance for the poor, to gay rights, to abortion, etc. Her positions are basically Elizabeth Warren (which, btw, would be normal for our church). Her son decided to rebel by becoming a religious conservative. He joined the military and a very conservative church that prohibits women pastors or leaders (which I saw a real slap the face). They still love their kid and believe that he can make whatever choices he wants, but it remains a fascinating rebellion to me. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/95 "2019-08-02T15:37:36Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well throw this back on the atheists. > > Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) > Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. > > How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? It would probably depend on the atheist. I would not recommend reacting like [Madlyn Murray O’Hair](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_J._Murray). Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2019, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/96 "2019-08-02T18:38:04Z")
> [@ISiddiqui](#): > > Yeeah… this seems far more about you projecting your religious experiences as opposed to any future kids of mine attending a very progressive congregation, in a progressive denomination, which promotes questioning and discussion. Er, this whole discussion between us was in response to my question: > [@begbert2](#): > > What if they openly scorned it? Made it perfectly clear that they thought every part of the religion and service were stupid? So the issue is not me projecting, it’s you fighting the hypothetical. > [@ISiddiqui](#): > > Hi. I’m a faithful Lutheran who has atheist friends. We have debated religion. Generally the folks that want to be assholes about it (well if so they may not remain friends for too long) end up exasperated when I enthusiastically agree with them that my faith is indeed completely irrational - like they expected me to get angry with them (another strike of being assholish). Oh, telling you your religion is irrational is the least of it. A _proper_ dismantling starts by proving that you’re a demon worshiper and moves on from there. Assuming one wants to bother with such a thing. As noted, it’s not really that fun a thing to do, particularly with somebody you halfway like. > [@ISiddiqui](#): > > Yes, because you choose to be an asshole to them. If I ever wanted to destroy a friendship with somebody, I’d dismantle their political beliefs in front of them or Hell, even their favorite show. Attempting to dismantling anything anyone holds dear shows a complete lack of respect for them as a person, so yeah, you’d lose that friendship. I ain’t disagreeing - I’m just saying that this is the _easiest_ assholery I’m aware of. Talk at somebody for half an hour and you’re done. > [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well just when atheists have done away with Christians, another religion will come along. How are you all handling new agers, wiccans, and satanists? I’ll just note that I never said or implied or even _hinted_ that a mass slaughter was anywhere in the plans. > [@kayaker](#): > > Do you know about confirmation bias? I’m an atheist and I sure do love to drink. The thing is, the other drinkers/alcoholics who I talk to overwhelmingly are religious. And I’m an atheist who’s never touched a drop in my life! > [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well throw this back on the atheists. > > Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) > Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. > > How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? Well, I’d be surprised and disappointed. And I’d politely but firmly inform them that in my household we don’t do prayers or other somesuch. Don’t pray out loud, and _certainly_ don’t try to lead the group in a prayer. Praying silently to yourself is fine, I suppose. Don’t expect anybody else to wait for you to finish, though. If they came in wearing crosses or religious paraphernalia, I would respond depending on how ostentatious the display was. If it was just a little cross on a necklace, I’d probably react about the same way a conservative 50’s parent would respond to a mohawk; grimacing and rolling my eyes until I got tired of doing so. If they were decked out to such a degree I thought they were deliberately trying to provoke me, I’d tell them to cut that out, and either take it off and leave until they can come back dressed decently. Just as I’d expect my mom to do if I showed up wearing a “Fuck You” shirt. And of course if they tried to proselytize at me or convert me (which, face it, is a near-certainty), then I’d either tell them not to bother or take it as an invitation to rip their beliefs to shreds, depending on how annoying they were being at the time. (For context on the prayer thing, in my personal experience all vocal prayers tend to automatically include all listeners as well. That bothered me, and I expressed the desire not to be in the room at the time. My mom responded by _refusing to let me leave the room when a prayer happened_. Her intent was to force me to pray by proxy, whether I wanted to or not. In response I stopped going to her house or any similar function until she relented, which took her about eight months if I recall correctly. I am now allowed to leave a room before the occupants of said room are led in prayer.) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2019, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/97 "2019-08-03T02:20:31Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Well throw this back on the atheists. > > Say you have kids and you’ve spent your life insulting and making fun of Christians as bible thumpers and basically making fun of anyone who was stupid enough to believe in somebody in the sky with a long beard and all. Oh, and you raise your kids to do the same and you praise them for seeing the light and for being such good little atheists. You even send them to [atheist summer camp.](https://abcnews.go.com/US/atheist-summer-camp-heaven-earth-nonbelievers/story?id=17067039) > Well you see where this is going. They come home from college and seem… different. They seem quiet about it at first but after awhile, you find out they have become the very thing you hate the most in the world - Christians. > > How do you handle it? You cant say how your open minded to the beliefs of others can you? Don’t forget about home-schooling the kids so they won’t be exposed to religious people, and Christians in particular? I know of two families who did exactly this, one atheist and the other pagan. I have no idea how this worked out in the end. My guess is that the kids would, in some cases, get reeeeally curious about this God that their parents claim to hate so much, even though they don’t believe It (in whatever form) exists, so they start reading various holy books, etc. to see what the big deal is all about. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2019, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/98 "2019-08-03T02:23:18Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > It would probably depend on the atheist. > > I would not recommend reacting like [Madlyn Murray O’Hair](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_J._Murray). > > Regards, > Shodan She was a train wreck from day one. Anyway, William Murray has said on the record that the prayer he was forced to recite at school really was unconstitutional. More than once, I’ve had people say to me, both IRL and online, “I believe that kids should pray in school, because children should start their day with prayer.” I reply, “Then you should pray with your kids at breakfast.” I once heard a Congressman say the same thing about this subject. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2019, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/99 "2019-08-03T03:16:50Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > The last time I had much of a discussion with an atheist was while I was in the hotel bar while at a convention. He felt the need to promote his atheism and was surprised when I seemed interested and knew much about it. Of course he was on his 3rd drink of the night and had been really dropping big money in the bar every night. What is it about atheists that makes them want to drink so much? . I’m tempted to say ‘Religious people, of course!’ But actually I suspect that most of those of us who are sober don’t usually mention our atheism to strangers. So you don’t usually find out about the rest of the sample. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2019, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624/100 "2019-08-03T03:17:02Z")
Some denominations make a big thing about Confirmation, which includes a Profession of Faith. A kid is supposed to be able to make that of their own free will. This usually takes place somewhere around age 12-14. All three of my kids went through their Confirmation and promptly quit going to church. One of them actually said, “Hey, I’m an adult in the church. I get to choose whether I go or not.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/religious-dopers-when-do-you-let-your-kids-opt-out/837624.md?page=6)