# Remake City: Recast "The Magnificent Seven" from today's actors **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 20, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827 "2007-05-20T16:55:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/1 "2007-05-20T16:55:16Z")
In spite of the sequels and tack-ons that followed the huge success of the original 1960 blockbuster, it’s time to go for broke and redo the whole thing. Who would you select from the current slate of he-men and tough guys to replace the original cast? Yul Brynner Steve McQueen Charles Bronson James Coburn Robert Vaughn Brad Dexter Horst Buchholz and of course Eli Wallach ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/2 "2007-05-20T20:08:50Z")
My first response upon seeing this thread was “For the love of god, why?!?” But that doesn’t stop me from having an opinion or two, considering it’s probably only a matter of time anyways: Three names that sprang immediately to mind were… George Clooney Brad Pitt Russell Crowe Slightly more “obscure”, but I’d like to see… Johnny Depp Will Smith That leaves two more. Two names I definitely \*don’t \*want to see? Ben Affleck Matt Damon ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/3 "2007-05-20T20:23:43Z")
It’s really no big surprise to see the “Ocean’s some-number” gang involved, since they’re probably as close as we have to the Rat Pack types these days. Another source may be the LOTR crowd. It could also be a great opportunity for somebody to come up with the anti-magnificent seven including Adam Sandler, Pauly Shore, PeeWee Herman and the like. Or even an all-gal group. Just have fun with the idea and just maybe Hollywood will leave this classic alone. Right. ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/4 "2007-05-20T20:27:33Z")
Why does it have to be a male cast? I’d like to see a remake with a bunch of butt-kicking women. Peta Wilson, Jessica Alba, Kristanna Loken, and such. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/5 "2007-05-20T20:56:33Z")
I’ll bite: Yul Brynner - Samuel Jackson Steve McQueen - Daniel Craig Charles Bronson - Pierce Brosnan James Coburn - Sean Bean Robert Vaughn - Ewan McGregor Brad Dexter - Viggo Mortensen Horst Buchholz - Daniel Radcliffe and of course Eli Wallach - Alan Rickman ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/6 "2007-05-20T21:36:50Z")
Yummy. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2007, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/7 "2007-05-20T22:08:36Z")
[QUOTE=pinkfreud] Why does it have to be a male cast? [/QUOTE] Your wish is my command: Yul Brynner - Jodie Foster Steve McQueen - Helen Mirren Charles Bronson - Halle Berry James Coburn - Rosamund Pike Robert Vaughn - Michelle Yeoh Brad Dexter - Ziyi Zhang Horst Buchholz - Kiera Knightley and of course Eli Wallach - Tilda Swinton ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/8 "2007-05-21T01:19:06Z")
[QUOTE=Quartz] I’ll bite: Yul Brynner - Samuel Jackson Steve McQueen - Daniel Craig Charles Bronson - Pierce Brosnan James Coburn - Sean Bean Robert Vaughn - Ewan McGregor Brad Dexter - Viggo Mortensen Horst Buchholz - Daniel Radcliffe and of course Eli Wallach - Alan Rickman [/QUOTE] I love this line up except remove Pierce and replace him with Steve Buscemi. I was actually going to post Craig and Rickman. I like your other choices better than mine. Jim ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/9 "2007-05-21T12:32:11Z")
Did any of you ever see [Mystery Men (1999)](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0132347/)? I confess that I didn’t but I did see trailers and that made me remember that cast as a possible “7 whatever” in the anti-magnificent vein. One blurb from IMDB: “The city’s fate rests in the hands of seven loser superhero wannabes: the fork-flinging Blue Rajah, the shovel-wielding Shoveler, the posessed bowling ball-hurling Bowler, the flatulent Spleen, the only-when-nobody’s-looking Invisible Boy, the mysterious Sphinx, and the perpetually-angry Mr. Furious.” Just look at the cast for that one. Somewhere between those guys, _Boogie Nights_ and maybe the remake of _The Longest Yard_ lie the potential varmints who can make new examination of the “seven” concept sparkle again for the generation that missed the first go-round. Better yet: a cast of B actors who have yet to rise above sidekick or assistant gofer. Who in that crowd needs the career boost? BTW, on the all-gal issue, note above where I did say, “It could also be a great opportunity for somebody to come up with the anti-magnificent seven including Adam Sandler, Pauly Shore, PeeWee Herman and the like. Or even an all-gal group.” Just please stay away from anime and Hanna Barbera. Please. No Yoda, either. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/10 "2007-05-21T12:45:56Z")
Half-serious now. I’d really love to see an all-African-American redo. Maybe even have it done in Africa so the villagers are all Black, too. I’m flexible on that part but the 7 should be pulled from this group of outstanding guys: Samuel L. Jackson Ving Rhames Don Cheadle Dennis Haysbert Forest Whitaker Denzel Washington Will Smith (Yes, I know some of these were mentioned earlier. That’s a good thing.) Unless somebody can name a better actor, I want Yaphet Kotto for the Eli Wallach role. Other candidates for the Seven: Andre Braugher Bill Duke Bill Nunn Laurence Fishburne Wesley Snipes Danny Glover Mykelti Williamson Cuba Gooding, Jr. Omar Epps (add to this list) Somebody might want to build an Asian group or a Latino group, too. That would work. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/11 "2007-05-21T13:16:07Z")
[QUOTE=Quartz] Your wish is my command: Yul Brynner - Jodie Foster Steve McQueen - Helen Mirren Charles Bronson - Halle Berry James Coburn - Rosamund Pike Robert Vaughn - Michelle Yeoh Brad Dexter - Ziyi Zhang Horst Buchholz - Kiera Knightley and of course Eli Wallach - Tilda Swinton [/QUOTE] I’d watch this! 😃 But surely either Michelle or Ziyi ought to play Coburn’s part, since they have the physical skills? ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/12 "2007-05-21T13:35:40Z")
[QUOTE=Zeldar] Half-serious now. I’d really love to see an all-African-American redo. Maybe even have it done in Africa so the villagers are all Black, too. I’m flexible on that part but the 7 should be pulled from this group of outstanding guys: Samuel L. Jackson Ving Rhames Don Cheadle Dennis Haysbert Forest Whitaker Denzel Washington Will Smith (Yes, I know some of these were mentioned earlier. That’s a good thing.) Unless somebody can name a better actor, I want Yaphet Kotto for the Eli Wallach role. [/QUOTE] It seems like this idea could be played out as US soldiers in Somalia going AWOL to protect a village against a local warlord. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/13 "2007-05-21T13:51:29Z")
[QUOTE=Hypno-Toad] It seems like this idea could be played out as US soldiers in Somalia going AWOL to protect a village against a local warlord. [/QUOTE] Not a bad idea. Another thought might be to modify the makeup of _The Unit_ to an all-black group and have them go rogue from whatever agency they are affiliated with. Haysbert is so right for his role in that show. The finale left it open as to how next season (which I think I saw will happen) will proceed. The team of Mamet and Ryan have done great things with the characters and situations and I foresee this show rising in respect next year. It’s been a favorite of mine from the get-go. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/14 "2007-05-21T14:48:07Z")
[QUOTE=glee] I’d watch this! 😃 But surely either Michelle or Ziyi ought to play Coburn’s part, since they have the physical skills? [/QUOTE] So does Pike. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/15 "2007-05-21T14:49:32Z")
[QUOTE=What Exit?] I love this line up except remove Pierce and replace him with Steve Buscemi. [/QUOTE] I considered him for Horst, but he’s too old. ---
**Author:** ![N9IWP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/n9iwp/32/3154_2.png) [@N9IWP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/N9IWP)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/16 "2007-05-21T14:50:20Z")
Wouldn’t an Asian group be a remake of “Seven Samurai”? Though I suppose it could be a non Japan movie. No Yoda? there goes my Muppet Magnificent Seven (Yoda, Kermit, Fozzie, Sam the Eagle, Gonzo, Rolf, and Animal) Brian ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/17 "2007-05-21T15:02:14Z")
[QUOTE=Quartz] I’ll bite: Yul Brynner - Samuel Jackson Steve McQueen - Daniel Craig Charles Bronson - Pierce Brosnan James Coburn - Sean Bean Robert Vaughn - Ewan McGregor Brad Dexter - Viggo Mortensen Horst Buchholz - Daniel Radcliffe and of course Eli Wallach - Alan Rickman [/QUOTE] I’d go. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/18 "2007-05-21T15:20:43Z")
[QUOTE=N9IWP] Wouldn’t an Asian group be a remake of “Seven Samurai”? Though I suppose it could be a non Japan movie. [/QUOTE] You do have a point! Why would Japanese film makers want to do a copy of a copy of a classic that began there? It would be like doing a remake of the American remake of _Godzilla_ or _Rodan_. (I remember it was cool in high school to yell out in the halls “Rodan’s in heat!” – but that was long ago). But if you go for a more international cast to include Chow Yun-Fat and Jackie Chan and maybe some of the Bollywood hunks, I suppose the Japanese could grin at that audacity? ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2007, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remake-city-recast-the-magnificent-seven-from-todays-actors/404827/19 "2007-05-21T18:47:30Z")
[QUOTE=Quartz] So does Pike. [/QUOTE] Aha! I realise she was in ‘Die another day’. Certainly she has the agility (and is a hottie 🙂 ).