# Remakes... FROM HELL!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 29, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023 "2006-12-29T20:10:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/1 "2006-12-29T20:10:05Z")
Since Hollywood seems to have decided to re-make any and all movies/TV shows/musicals/etc. that ever have surfaced on this planet, I got around to thinking which remakes one REALLY doesn’t need to see. One that would drive me wild, for instance, would be [Pink Floyd: The Wall](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084503/) , with Shakira’s interpretation of the music and (who else?) Pink as Pink. Any other bright ideas you WOULDN’T want to see realized? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/2 "2006-12-29T20:12:39Z")
F-Troop. I can’t conceive of how this could be remade in today’s society. ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/3 "2006-12-29T20:13:13Z")
“Blue Velvet.” With Smurfs. ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/4 "2006-12-29T20:19:19Z")
[Brazil](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088846/), starring Carrot Top and, I don’t know… Rosie O’Donnell. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/5 "2006-12-29T20:19:24Z")
“Hogan’s Heroes”. Hell, I don’t know how it got approved the \*first \* time. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/6 "2006-12-29T20:28:21Z")
[QUOTE=Eutychus] “Blue Velvet.” With Smurfs. [/QUOTE] Hey, I’d pay five dollars to see that! ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/7 "2006-12-29T20:29:28Z")
[QUOTE=Ethilrist] F-Troop. I can’t conceive of how this could be remade in today’s society. [/QUOTE] Oh come on. I can see this. In fact, I’ll bet it’s in production. Troops: Capt Parmentar: Will Ferrell Sgt O’Rourke: Benicio Del Toro Cpl Agarn: Steve Carrell Pvt Dobbs: Chris Rock Others: Chief ???:An Indian who can do comedy (Edward Everett Horton): Another Indian who can do comedy Jane: Renee Zellwegger Bad Guys: Gen. Ulysses Parmentar: Ed Asner (temporarily) Col. Arnaud-Amaury: Alan Rickman Dewey C. Undhow of the Great Western Railroad Co.: William H Macy It writes itself ---
**Author:** ![Gukumatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/74df32/32.png) [@Gukumatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gukumatz)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/8 "2006-12-29T20:48:00Z")
Apropos of nothing at all, and particularly not this thread, the image of _Good Night, And Good Luck_ starring **Stephen Colbert** as Edward Murrow, just came unbidden to my mind . . . ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/9 "2006-12-29T21:08:06Z")
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest with Jim Carey and Rosie O’Donnell ---
**Author:** ![JSexton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/96bed5/32.png) [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/10 "2006-12-29T21:22:46Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest with Jim Carey and Rosie O’Donnell [/QUOTE] Hearing the Nurse Ratchet speech delivered from Jim Carrey’s butt would make it a new classic. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/11 "2006-12-29T21:29:36Z")
_The African Queen_, starring RuPaul. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/12 "2006-12-29T21:38:48Z")
Any Bond movie : “Arnold Schwarzenegger IS James Bond !” ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/13 "2006-12-29T21:41:37Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest with Jim Carey and Rosie O’Donnell [/QUOTE] Just imagining this has cracked me up completely - I can barely breath! I’m just picturing Carey doing his take of insane and seeing it as a combination of something from Dumb and Dumber and Liar Liar. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/14 "2006-12-29T21:43:20Z")
[QUOTE=Der Trihs] Any Bond movie : “Arnold Schwarzenegger IS James Bond !” [/QUOTE] Even worse: Brad Pitt IS James Bond. Gentlemen, come for the death, explosions and fast car chases. Ladies, come for the nude scene. (or should that be cum for the nude scene…) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/15 "2006-12-29T22:00:12Z")
A _Casablanca_ remake with some cheesy 70’s TV actor like David Soul. ---
**Author:** ![Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f0a364/32.png) [@Rube\_E.Tewesday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rube_E.Tewesday)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/16 "2006-12-29T22:01:05Z")
Rosie O’Donnell in _Deep Throat_. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/17 "2006-12-29T22:08:03Z")
[QUOTE=Eve] [QUOTE=Eutychus] “Blue Velvet.” With Smurfs. [/QUOTE] Hey, I’d pay five dollars to see that! [/QUOTE] Smurfing A!! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/18 "2006-12-29T22:37:21Z")
[QUOTE=Ethilrist] F-Troop. I can’t conceive of how this could be remade in today’s society. [/QUOTE] [Guess what?](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F_Troop#Feature_film) ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/19 "2006-12-29T22:44:57Z")
_The Wicker Man_, starring, oh I don’t know, Nicholas Cage. Maybe directed by Neil LaBute. Now THAT would suck. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2006, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023/20 "2006-12-29T23:34:45Z")
[QUOTE=Little Nemo] A _Casablanca_ remake with some cheesy 70’s TV actor like David Soul. [/QUOTE] Would a remake with a [90s](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115624/) star do ? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remakes-from-hell/386023.md?page=2)