# Remedies for One Flatulently Enhanced **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 29, 2024, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302 "2024-12-29T15:41:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/21 "2024-12-30T05:43:11Z")
I find that the foods that affect the volume of gas and those that affect the odor are basically unrelated. I’m slightly lactose intolerant, and if i drink a lot of milk i get gas, but unless i also eat stinky foods, it doesn’t have much odor. There’s some sugar in apple juice that i don’t digest, and apples give me gas. I don’t have a lot of issues with beans, but many people do. If i eat a lot of onion and garlic i get a bit more odor. Fish increases the odor. Shellfish even more than finfish. Having a stomach bug sometimes makes my intestines smell terrible. In the letter case, i like to eat yogurt and drink kefir, both of which have probiotics that can help my gut flora get back to normal. Inulin is a fiber sometimes added to yogurt, though. It’s supposed to help the probiotics flourish. But you might want to check and see how you react to it. It increases the volume of gas for many people. ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/22 "2024-12-30T05:47:23Z")
Asparagus makes my pee distinctly stinky. I get that is not gas but not sure if the biology is somehow related. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/23 "2024-12-30T05:57:43Z")
> [@Eric1](#): > > There’s no associated pain but I would like to take care of my lower GI. If you are worried for your health, i don’t think you need to be. It _is_ possible for gas to damage your gut. My father literally burst his lower intestine from excess gas, and got sepsis. But my father had an extremely fragile gut (he was in rehab from major gut issues when it happened) and he had severe constipation and pain for two days before his gut burst. His problem was that the gas _wasn’t_ passing. If you are farting, the gas is passing through you. And if you don’t have any pain, it’s not putting a lot of pressure on your innards. Personally, i only worry about gas if I’m going to be trapped in tight, unventilated spaces with other people. Which is to say, i try not to drink a lot of milk or eat anything stinky before long flights, and otherwise don’t care. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/24 "2024-12-30T06:00:31Z")
> [@Eric1](#): > > I wondered what supplements you talk for excess winds. After beano, try probiotics, and to mask the smell- chlorophyll. > [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > I take it you’re not lactose intolerant? That was my problem, but regular probiotics have gotten it to the point where cheese is safe, and even some ice cream. But i shudder what would happen if i chugged a tall glass of whole milk. ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/25 "2024-12-30T06:06:24Z")
Weird thing is I have used Lactaid pills and they seem to do nothing for me. Which sucks because they are weirdly expensive. Needless to say I don’t buy them any more. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/26 "2024-12-30T06:07:51Z")
Lactaid will only help if you specifically have issues with lactose. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/27 "2024-12-30T06:10:41Z")
Oh, you should look into FODMAPS. > **[FODMAP](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/FODMAP)** > > FODMAPs or fermentable oligosaccharides, disaccharides, monosaccharides, and polyols are short-chain carbohydrates that are poorly absorbed in the small intestine and ferment in the colon. They include short-chain oligosaccharide polymers of fructose (fructans) and galactooligosaccharides (GOS, stachyose, raffinose), disaccharides (lactose), monosaccharides (fructose), and sugar alcohols (polyols), such as sorbitol, mannitol, xylitol, and maltitol. Most FODMAPs are naturally present in f FODMAPs ... Lots of people have issues digesting FODMAPS, and one symptom of that is gas. The way to find out is to experiment with your diet, but it helps to know what to keep track of. Most beans are high in FODMAPS, but so are lots of other foods. ---
**Author:** ![phs3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8491ac/32.png) [@phs3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phs3)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/28 "2024-12-30T07:21:24Z")
If all else fails, ask your doctor if Flagyl is right for you. Srsly. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/29 "2024-12-30T07:53:09Z")
I only know one person with this problem. And he learned that he reacted to onions. That doesn’t mean that he’s toot-free if he eats no onions. But onions take him to DEFCON 2. It’s an easy thing to check. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/30 "2024-12-30T08:24:59Z")
Apparently it does that to most people, but only some people can smell it. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/31 "2024-12-30T08:47:47Z")
The volume went up significantly as well. ---
**Author:** ![Eric1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3bc359/32.png) [@Eric1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eric1)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/32 "2024-12-30T13:48:05Z")
I’ve appreciated advice from each of you and am naturally taking notes. I made an appointment with a CN to plan a regimen and have previously spoken with my doctor about my diet as part of health. ---
**Author:** ![Pardel-Lux](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pardel-lux/32/20182_2.png) [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/33 "2024-12-30T14:24:49Z")
There is always the possibility of making a virtue out of necessity: if you can’t stop it, turn it into a job. Here are two famous examples: > **[Roland the Farter](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roland_the_Farter)** > > Roland the Farter (known in contemporary records as Roland le Fartere, Roulandus le Fartere, Rollandus le Pettus or Roland le Petour) was a medieval flatulist who lived in twelfth-century England. He was given Hemingstone manor in Suffolk and 30 acres (12 hectares) of land in return for his services as a jester for King Henry II. Each year, he was obliged to perform "saltum, siffletum, pettum" (a jump, a whistle, \[and\] a fart that were all done at once) for the king's court at Christmas.\[3 Rolan... Perhaps the White House needs a serious jester soon? Guaranteed to break the ice at international receptions! And for our modern times, with TikTok and other social media, this gentleman may be an example to follow: > **[Le Pétomane](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Le_P%C3%A9tomane)** > > Joseph Pujol (June 1, 1857 – August 8, 1945), better known by his stage name Le Pétomane (/ləˈpɛtəmeɪn/, .mw-parser-output .IPA-label-small{font-size:85%}.mw-parser-output .references .IPA-label-small,.mw-parser-output .infobox .IPA-label-small,.mw-parser-output .navbox .IPA-label-small{font-size:100%}French pronunciation: \[ləpetɔman\]), was a French flatulist (professional fartist) and entertainer. He was famous for his remarkable control of the abdominal muscles, which enabled him to seemingl It... Perhaps with a detour via America’s Got Talent or a similar show. Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/34 "2024-12-30T21:08:41Z")
Now that we’ve gotten to humor… a cousin once sent Mrs. Cretin a pack of undershort filters for dealing with _my_ alleged emanations. Despite my indignation I went ahead and tried one. Cut it into two halves, rolled each half into a small cylinder, had Lovey stick one into each nostril. THEY WORKED!! ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2024, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/35 "2024-12-30T21:34:04Z")
Cabbage, broccoli, apple juice are my biggest culprits. Beans only give minor gas. Cabbage is the worst. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2024, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/36 "2024-12-31T05:09:39Z")
For the last maybe 5 years, I’ve had lower gut pain every day, which lasts for about 4 hours. This pain ranges from about a 4 to a 7 in intensity, with a 10 being your arm ripped off by a chainsaw. Weirdly, there’s no pain before it starts, and when it’s finally run it’s course for the day, I feel fine. But those hours are pretty miserable. I tried probiotics, I tried excluding dairy, I tried glutin-free. I went in for my regular colonoscopy (small polyp, nothing to worry about), then made an appt for the pain. Of course, I saw a nurse practitioner, not the doc. I had a CT scan, and an ultrasound. I tried a couple meds they tried. They never got to the bottom of my pain, and I’m sort of resigned to having about 1/4 of my waking time in real pain. Honestly, it’s sort of miserable. I like to volunteer to do dog rescue transports, but only do the early ones, because I’m never sure when the pain is going to start, and it’s bad enough that driving is difficult. StG ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2024, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/37 "2024-12-31T05:20:53Z")
Did you have pain the day you fasted prior to the colonoscopy? How about the day of the colonoscopy? ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2024, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/38 "2024-12-31T05:36:20Z")
If I recall correctly, I had minimal pain the day of my last colonoscopy. I don’t remember the pain level for the day before. I’d say about 5% of days I have minimal pain. but that doesn’t seem to correlate to times I’ve eaten. Defecation will usually bring on pain about 15 minutes after, if I haven’t started my pain yet. It usually starts at least 3 hours after I get up in the morning. But sometimes (today, for example), instead of starting at 10 am, it didn’t start until 4:00 pm. Generally it feels better to be up and moving than to be reclining. I’ll often use that time to feed horses, or move bales of hay or bags of feed. StG ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2024, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/39 "2024-12-31T12:40:28Z")
I wonder if you could have some abdominal adhesions that cause pain at some point as food passes through your system. > **[What Are Abdominal Adhesions?](https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/15254-abdominal-adhesions)** > > Fragments of scar tissue that cause tissue to stick together in your abdomen are called “adhesions.” Here’s why they form and when you need to worry about them. Do you have a history of intestinal surgery or infections that might have caused scar tissue to form? Anyway, it sounds worth seeing another doctor, in case someone else can diagnose it, whatever it is. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2024, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302/40 "2024-12-31T13:41:58Z")
IANA medical anything, but my late wife had many intestinal adhesions. So I’ve got some vicarious experience with them. Intestinal adhesions increase the odds of intestinal blockages. Which are life threatening events albeit over the course of days, not hours. You might try switching to a diet of all soft food for a few days to see if that changes anything. By “soft” I mean applesauce, oatmeal, pudding, pureed soups, wet mashed potatoes, etc. Stuff eaten with a spoon where chewing is 100% optional. But chew it anyway and take plenty of liquids with it. Since it takes a couple days for stuff to make a complete trip through you, and longer if there’s a bottleneck in there, you’ll need to keep this up for probably 5 days before you’ll see a change in the pain if there is to be one. It’s not a very fun diet, but it is a diagnostic one. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remedies-for-one-flatulently-enhanced/1012302.md?page=3)