# Remember Bored Of The Rings? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 28, 2002, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374 "2002-12-28T16:45:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c67d28/32.png) [@Weird\_AL\_Einstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weird_AL_Einstein)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/21 "2002-12-29T03:50:31Z")
See my sig. ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/22 "2002-12-29T04:24:37Z")
_Grundig Blaupunkt luger frug Watusi snarf wazoo! Nixon Dirksen nasahist Rebozo boogaloo!_ ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/23 "2002-12-29T04:39:31Z")
I sit on the floor and pick my nose and dream of fiendish things of devious dwarves who suck their toes and elves who drub their dings * * * I may have it slightly wrong, haven’t read that book since high school, 20 yrs ago. But I may just go out and buy it again, thanks for the memories. ---
**Author:** ![Bullwinkle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8491ac/32.png) [@Bullwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/24 "2002-12-29T05:09:48Z")
I lost my copy of ‘Bored’ in a basement flood years ago, an original too! I refused to buy the new edition because the cover was so bad. I have trouble whenever I read ‘LOTR’ because I always picture Aragorn in a Lone Ranger suit. Some favorite quotes: Spam, answering the door at the inn in Bree, “That had better be food, because I’m going to eat it.” (I always say this when the pizza guy comes and none of my friends ever gets the reference. I have lame friends.) Gimlet, after a long ride on a laxative-laden Merino, “That damned four-legged pot roast busted my coccyx for sure!” Doug Kinney had a way with words. Too bad he fell off a cliff. Also, Gondor was called ‘Gonad’. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/25 "2002-12-29T05:52:25Z")
It’s a pity I’ve run out of bullets. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/26 "2002-12-29T05:55:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AskNott \* > **The depiction of Hobbits showed them as gluttonous dimwits, for comic effect.** As opposed to their depiction in Tolkien, who showed them as … gluttonous dimwits. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/27 "2002-12-29T14:05:44Z")
I’m with **Tblue** - never made it through Bored - found it way too boring and unfunny. ---
**Author:** ![Archergal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Archergal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archergal)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2002, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/28 "2002-12-29T18:40:05Z")
I always remember “Deus ex Machina Airlines.” ---
**Author:** ![partly\_warmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@partly\_warmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/partly_warmer)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/29 "2003-01-03T14:20:50Z")
“Sure can dance!” “Sure gonna die!” “The old coot must be losing it: that’s a whole paragraph without a punchline!” “Gotta go now, the rush is coming.” (Tim Benzadrine) “It has a certain hole-like quality.” “Round,” agreed Frito. “Deep.” BOTR, rumor has it, has quite a reputation in publishing circles, since it’s one of the few parodies that’s been in print for decades. As for Beard saying it was a piece of shit . . . well, I’ve never read anything else of his I liked as much. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/30 "2003-01-03T14:30:03Z")
I actually just bought “Bored of the Rings”, after hearing about it from some friends. So far it’s good. I like how evil the Hobbits seem. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/31 "2003-01-03T14:44:18Z")
**Bored of the Rings** is still in print – I just saw it at the bookstore. I still have my two old copies, with the original cover. The cover art, both front and back, is a parody of the original Houghton Mifflin/Ballantine paperback covers. I especially like the green box on the back cover, with its request that readers not purchase this edition if they;'re looking for LOTR. In the original Ballantine editions, there was a green box at the back with a message from Tolkien asking readers to purchase only that edition, because another company (Ace books, unbelievably) had previously published a paperback edition of LOTR without his permission ! The Harvard Lampoon has done a number of parodies over the years in just this style. Before Bored of the Rings, they did a spot-on parody of James Bond entitled **Alligator**. Like BOTR, it is a hoot, and the cover parodies the original Signet edition covers of Fleming’s books. But Alligator had very poor distribution (I was finally lucky enough to find a copy a decade ago), while BOTR was picked up by a major publisher (Signet, oddly enough) and received excellent distribution. I saw rows upon rows of them in a drugstore bookrack back in the early seventies. So people are likelier to be familiar with BOTR than with Alligator, or the Playboy parody, or the other Lampoon efforts. **Doon** , mentioned above, is pretty good (although not as good as BOTR), but was published by National Lampoon, not Harvard Lampoon. Beard and Kenney, of course, were among the founders of NL. Interesting sidelight: Both BOTR and the “book” of Animal House talked about ingenious systems for piping beer to the party/frat rooms. Doug Kenny was associated with both. Coincidence? Or did Kenney have an interest in piping beer through the Lampoon Castle? ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/32 "2003-01-03T15:22:43Z")
A bunch of mean and nasty men who all think Sohed’s Numba Ten! A fine bit of writing, in ten more years it will be as understandable as Shakespere. (Teacher, what is a “Rebozo?”) My copy fell apart, I bought a scanner and sucked each page into my Hard Drive of Doom. I still read it from time to time. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Mapp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miss_mapp/32/369_2.png) [@Miss\_Mapp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Mapp)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/33 "2003-01-03T15:29:33Z")
I hunted down and bought a new copy of BOTR last year when I couldn’t find the old one (I suspect a sibling has it). I hadn’t read it in years before that, but some lines remain in my head, and emerge every time I read LOTR or watched one of the recent movies. Gandalf can’t speak of Bilbo’s encounter with Gollum, “Pity stayed his hand,” without my following it up with “It’s a pity I’ve run out of bullets.” And “It takes a heap o’ vittles to gag a boggie” comes back to me every time I read/watch the birthday party scene. ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/34 "2003-01-03T16:26:20Z")
I think this is the perfect birthday gift for my uncle (and a copy for myself, perhaps.) I loved “Doon.” ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/35 "2003-01-03T16:34:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by partly\_warmer \* > **As for Beard saying it was a piece of shit . . . well, I’ve never read anything else of his I liked as much.** Personally, I think Henry Beard’s _ **Latin for All Occasions** _ was a classic. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/36 "2003-01-03T17:18:53Z")
Chorus: We are the chorus, and we agree. We agree, we agree, we agree. Now that’s the stuff of legend. ---
**Author:** ![as\_u\_wish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@as\_u\_wish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/as_u_wish)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/37 "2003-01-03T17:45:05Z")
I never quite saw Tom Bombadil the same way after reading about Tim Benzedrine with his eyes like baseballs of raw bacon. I have the old version with the pig cover, rather tattered. And I must agree, it’s best in small doses–read a little until you get a belly laugh. Then pause. ---
**Author:** ![Fretburner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@Fretburner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretburner)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/38 "2003-01-03T19:36:07Z")
Don’t forget the two towers: Minas Troney and Chiken Noodl. I haven’t read the book in years, but that always stuck with me. ---
**Author:** ![Aleq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@Aleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aleq)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2003, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/39 "2003-01-03T20:42:05Z")
Oh my gawd–I love this board so much! When my SO and I went to see LOTR:FOTR and we got to the part where the Balrog was about to appear, we leaned in toward each other and whispered–in unison, mind you–“dribble, fake, dribble, dribble SHOOT!” and cracked up… All hail NatLamp in any of its incarnations… ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2003, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374/40 "2003-01-04T00:26:41Z")
It’s a Thesaurus…with a pronounced Gazeteer! Goodgulf: I have been changed…transformed! At which point two aces fall out of his sleeve and one of the boogies (IIRC) says “Wanna bet?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remember-bored-of-the-rings/145374.md?page=3)