# remembering people - techniques **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 8, 2012, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259 "2012-05-08T08:00:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/21 "2012-05-10T02:18:48Z")
> [@Keeve](#): > > I’ve heard this a idea a gazillion times, but in my experience, to say that “it’s not as easy as it seems” is a HUGE understatement. In your example, when I meet this guy the next time, I might notice his big nose, but what will remind me to think of the tack? That’s the part I could never figure out. I don’t use the technique. However, as I understand it, the point is that the silly image will impress the memory on your brain, and to do it well, practice is required. I do use a similar technique for shorter passwords I use frequently. I generate a random password, then make up a nonsense sentence where each alpha character begins a word in the sentence. Sometimes I’ll change a character to make a better sentence. And I handle special characters, well, specially. 😃 It really does help memorizing the password. ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/22 "2012-05-10T03:16:45Z")
The worst is when manners dictates that you introduce a third party to someone you might have known for years (neighbor, dog Parker, eg). What I do, as I do sometimes in similar cases when it is just me and the forgotten-name person: “what is your full name again?” Thus, with luck they’ll say Joe Smidlap, even though you don’t care about the Schmidlap. The real worst, I suppose, would be the case in _Seinfeld_ where you forget the name of the person you’re necking with. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/23 "2012-05-10T03:29:49Z")
I think it’s also important to remember that there’s absolutely no shame in admitting it. “Hi, nice to see you again! I’m Scarlett, and I’m so terrible at remembering names; please tell me yours again?” Just remember that everyone forgets names, and none of us mind when people forget our names, so why should someone get upset if you forgot? (And if they do get upset, well, then they’re a dick.) ---
**Author:** ![moejoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@moejoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moejoe)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/24 "2012-05-10T04:34:19Z")
> [@Scarlett67](#): > > I think it’s also important to remember that there’s absolutely no shame in admitting it. “Hi, nice to see you again! I’m Scarlett, and I’m so terrible at remembering names; please tell me yours again?” Just remember that everyone forgets names, and none of us mind when people forget our names, so why should someone get upset if you forgot? (And if they do get upset, well, then they’re a dick.) So true. My trick is I usually ask again at the end of the first meeting, as in - say, it’s been great meeting you, Bob was it? Ok Bob, have a safe flight home eh? I’m great at remembering people and names even years later after one quick meeting, but my real trick is creating a little relationship of some kind during that first meeting. My theory is that I don’t forget the names of people I know well, or my first cat or my grandmother, and that’s because _I know more about them than just their name and what they look like_. Trying to remember just names and faces would be a real challenge, but remembering Bob, who laughed at my cowboy joke when we met at that sales meeting last year, or Mary the weird lady who helped me pick out a picture frame in the Walgreens last Christmas is no problem. Hey Helen! long time no see! Did you ever find your jacket after the Murphy’s party? I can learn enough about a person in five minutes to remember them forever if I’m really paying attention to them when we meet. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/25 "2012-05-10T04:58:03Z")
> [@Keeve](#): > > I’ve heard this a idea a gazillion times, but in my experience, to say that “it’s not as easy as it seems” is a HUGE understatement. In your example, when I meet this guy the next time, I might notice his big nose, but what will remind me to think of the tack? That’s the part I could never figure out. Well, the idea is that your mnemonic is sufficiently ridiculous enough that seeing his big nose instantly reminds you of the tack. If the image is not strong enough, or your memory can’t otherwise hold on to the image, then it’s not going to work. For me, some things stick directly and instantly, while other things require a mnemonic device for dependable recall. But these general types of tricks work unbelievably well for me. I can’t do it now, but as a kid, I’d be able to memorize decks of cards and long strings of numbers using this type of “connect one silly image to another” type of memorization technique. But YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![lisiate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f05b48/32.png) [@lisiate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisiate)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/26 "2012-05-10T05:16:12Z")
A year’s a pretty tall order. I find that repeating the name back to them when first told it helps a lot. And then using it a few times in conversation thereafter really helsp to make it stick. Something like: Them: Hi, I’m Bob Me: Hi Bob, nice to meet you. …[later in conversation] Me: No Bob, I’m not interested in purchasing a timeshare. … Me: Bob, I prefer not to discuss religious matters during a business meeting. … Me: Well I guess I’lol be leaving now Bob, good luck with your upcoming missionary work in Saudi Arabia. ---
**Author:** ![Corcaigh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Corcaigh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corcaigh)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/27 "2012-05-10T12:49:19Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > No, no, no! You just never say their name! You say “Hi! How’s it going?” and you just never put yourself in that position. Oh around here people expect to be called by name, so you have to say _something_ I usually call women “Mary” since there’s a 50/50 chance I’ll be right LOL ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/28 "2012-05-10T13:00:52Z")
> [@Corcaigh](#): > > Oh around here people expect to be called by name, so you have to say _something_ > > I usually call women “Mary” since there’s a 50/50 chance I’ll be right LOL Not to advocate or anything, but you could check the recent thread on “Given Names” for an alternate that has a better chance of being wrong. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/29 "2012-05-10T13:40:35Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > [hijack] > > There’s an old joke that sort of ties in with the theme here. The third grade teacher was telling the kids at the beginning of the year about her unusual name. > > “Now, boys and girls, my name is Ms. Prussy. And I want you to think of your kitty cat and just put an R in there so it will be easy to remember.” > > Next morning Little Johnny (who else?) comes in all grinning and greets her, “Good morning, Ms. Crunt.” > > [/hijack] > [@](#): > > When I was teaching at Penn State, I had a colleague whose last name was Yeagley. He would tell his students, “My name is Yeagley; there’s a `y' on each end, and an `eagle’ in the middle.” > > One year, several weeks after the beginning of school, he overheard the following conversation between two students: > > First student: “I have this great physics teacher.” > > Second student: “Yeah? What’s his name?” > > First student: “Mr. Yowly.” [http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1993-05-17/features/9305170165\_1\_dear-abby-eating-first-student](http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1993-05-17/features/9305170165_1_dear-abby-eating-first-student) ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/30 "2012-05-10T13:50:04Z")
> [@Corcaigh](#): > > [Quote=Zsofia] > > No, no, no! You just never say their name! You say “Hi! How’s it going?” and you just never put yourself in that position. Oh around here people expect to be called by name, so you have to say something I usually call women “Mary” since there’s a 50/50 chance I’ll be right LOL [/quote] > [@Zeldar](#): > > Not to advocate or anything, but you could check the recent thread on “Given Names” for an alternate that has a better chance of being wrong. 😃 And I see that you already know about (and contributed to) that thread. 🙂 > [@Enderw24](#): > > [http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1993-05-17/features/9305170165\_1\_dear-abby-eating-first-student](http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1993-05-17/features/9305170165_1_dear-abby-eating-first-student) Thanks for helping with the joke, and that’s a cool link. Maybe another Names spinoff thread brewing? ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/31 "2012-05-10T16:08:22Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Well, the idea is that your mnemonic is sufficiently ridiculous enough that seeing his big nose instantly reminds you of the tack. If the image is not strong enough, or your memory can’t otherwise hold on to the image, then it’s not going to work. For me, some things stick directly and instantly, while other things require a mnemonic device for dependable recall. But these general types of tricks work unbelievably well for me. I can’t do it now, but as a kid, I’d be able to memorize decks of cards and long strings of numbers using this type of “connect one silly image to another” type of memorization technique. But YMMV. The fairly recent book “Moonwalking with Einstein” is an autobiography of a memory whiz with lots of this kind of trick. ---
**Author:** ![abel29a](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@abel29a](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abel29a)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/32 "2012-05-10T19:37:48Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > There’s a book (maybe even a CD or DVD – can’t remember 😉 ) by a memory expert stage performer who used to be on Johnny Carson, that goes into memory tricks of all sorts. > > Best I can recall (I only skimmed the book in a bookstore and didn’t buy it) the names thing was a matter of associating facial (or bodily) features with some weirded up version of the name as a linking device. > > This performer had as his feature bit, calling off the names of the entire audience, one by one, row by row, after only learning their names as they entered the theater. I wish I could remember his name… > > Something Robbins, maybe? Could you be thinking of Derren Brown? He has a book called [Tricks of the mind](http://www.amazon.co.uk/Tricks-The-Mind-Derren-Brown/dp/1905026269), which has lots of memory related tricks. I have the same problem as the OP btw, and have realized I’m face blind to an extent as well. I also can’t describe faces, or picture them in my mind - not sure if that is outside the norm tough 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/33 "2012-05-10T20:11:29Z")
> [@abel29a](#): > > Could you be thinking of Derren Brown? He has a book called [Tricks of the mind](http://www.amazon.co.uk/Tricks-The-Mind-Derren-Brown/dp/1905026269), which has lots of memory related tricks. I’m pretty sure now that it had to have been [Jerry Lucas](http://putnam.limaohio.com/articles/lucas-20173-memory-techniques.html) after doing a Yahoo! search on > [@](#): > > “johnny carson” memory expert audience names Your guy looks like a good read on the thread topic, though. ---
**Author:** ![ExcitedIdiot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ea5d25/32.png) [@ExcitedIdiot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExcitedIdiot)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/34 "2012-05-11T11:11:22Z")
> **[Prosopagnosia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prosopagnosia)** > > Prosopagnosia, also known as face blindness, is a cognitive disorder of face perception in which the ability to recognize familiar faces, including one's own face (self-recognition), is impaired, while other aspects of visual processing (e.g., object discrimination) and intellectual functioning (e.g., decision-making) remain intact. The term originally referred to a condition following acute brain damage (acquired prosopagnosia), but a congenital or developmental form of the disorder also e Pr... > [@](#): > > Prosopagnosia is a neurological disorder characterized by the inability to recognize faces. There is no treatment, but some tricks can help a person deal with it. Most techniques involve finding other things that you can remember, like speech, hair color, gait, body shapes, etc. Oliver Sacks suffers from Prosopagnosia, and writes about it in The man who mistook his wife for a hat. ---
**Author:** ![Keeve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f07891/32.png) [@Keeve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keeve)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/35 "2012-05-11T12:15:24Z")
> [@ExcitedIdiot](#): > > Oliver Sacks suffers from Prosopagnosia, and writes about it in The man who mistook his wife for a hat. That link, to Amazon, lets me read most of the first chapter. Absolutely fascinating! ---
**Author:** ![Corcaigh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Corcaigh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corcaigh)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/36 "2012-05-11T20:31:35Z")
> [@Zeldar](#): > > Not to advocate or anything, but you could check the recent thread on “Given Names” for an alternate that has a better chance of being wrong. 😃 Ah but here in Ireland, Mary is fierce popular! It’s a bit like that prank where you phone a place of business and ask for Dave - there’s nearly always a Dave working there. If you were to shout “Mary!” in the street at least two women would turn to look! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2012, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259/37 "2012-05-11T20:38:15Z")
> [@Corcaigh](#): > > Ah but here in Ireland, Mary is fierce popular! > > It’s a bit like that prank where you phone a place of business and ask for Dave - there’s nearly always a Dave working there. If you were to shout “Mary!” in the street at least two women would turn to look! > > 😃 This sounds a whole lot like the wedding reception in _Goodfellas_ with Dave replaced by Peter and Paul. Mary still dominated the women. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/remembering-people-techniques/621259.md?page=1)