# rephrase a humorous statement to make it more accurate **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 12, 2005, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206 "2005-12-12T03:02:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/21 "2005-12-12T16:45:58Z")
If you retire with canines you are prone to commence the next day laden with wingless blood-sucking insects of the order Siphonaptera. While sugary confections provide supereminence, it must be admitted that fermented grain provides greater celerity. Pulchritude does not extend beyond the profundity of the epidermis. Habitual or customary performance of what you advise in your homilies is itself advisable. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/22 "2005-12-12T17:26:39Z")
It is quite possible to coax a thoroughbred or a quarterhorse or even an Arabian to approach a water source but it may not be appropriate to the level of thirst the animal has at that time, or perhaps the water is brackish, or maybe it’s frozen, or maybe the animal’s mouth has been stapled or wired shut. In any case, don’t be overly concerned if the animal doesn’t drink any of the water. ---
**Author:** ![Mbossa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/73ab20/32.png) [@Mbossa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mbossa)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/23 "2005-12-12T21:17:48Z")
What goes up, but not so far up that it is no longer affected by Earth’s gravity, must come down, assuming there are no other forces acting upon it that could prevent it from coming down. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/24 "2005-12-12T21:28:00Z")
Finding yourself in a particular geographical location is the result of movement. The vector of travel is unimportant. ---
**Author:** ![Borborygmi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/borborygmi/32/217_2.png) [@Borborygmi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Borborygmi)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2005, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/25 "2005-12-12T21:59:32Z")
This thread is accumulating a buttload of replies, assuming that _buttload_, an ill-defined quantifier at best, conveys a large number or amount. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/26 "2005-12-13T02:01:41Z")
Oftentimes, the written word can do far more damage than a length of sharpened steel ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/27 "2005-12-13T02:18:00Z")
That is not indicative of our forming a closed curve, interlocking phalanges and producing a song in Gullah meaning _be present in this place_. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/28 "2005-12-13T02:27:10Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > That is not indicative of our forming a closed curve, interlocking phalanges and producing a song in Gullah meaning _be present in this place_. WTF??? ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/29 "2005-12-13T03:19:04Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > That is not indicative of our forming a closed curve, interlocking phalanges and producing a song in Gullah meaning _be present in this place_. Something about singing Kumbayah around a campfire? ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/30 "2005-12-13T03:20:08Z")
It is actually both the heat and the humidity, the latter exacerbating the former. ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/31 "2005-12-13T03:39:50Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > Men seldom make passes / At girls with big asses. Fat asses to squeeze at / Ain’t nothing to sneeze at. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/32 "2005-12-13T03:48:21Z")
Only those with a mediocre and unexciting/non-stimulating demeanor, intellect and personality can generally be said to not qualitiatively [vary](http://www.musicthoughts.com/t/314) with any noticeability. To the vast majority of the world, humans were created by a Divine Power. They have in turnabout envisioned this power [anthropomorphically](http://www.quotationspage.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=840&start=0&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=&sid=a95ff0805f0f20b6fd2a74561adae969). ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/33 "2005-12-13T05:00:45Z")
Timely intervention in both recognizing and repairing an obvious degeneration of a given object’s structural integrity largely prevents the onset of accelerated deterioriation that would ultimately require extraordinary emergency measures to halt further destruction and to achieve stabilization; conservative estimates have calculated that delayed aid usually correlates between “an eightfold to tenfold increase” as being “not atypical.” ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/34 "2005-12-13T05:05:20Z")
Mission not quite yet accomplished. ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/35 "2005-12-13T05:08:51Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > That is not indicative of our forming a closed curve, interlocking phalanges and producing a song in Gullah meaning _be present in this place_. I do not fully comprehend the nature of the more colloquial phrase that this lengthy description corresponds with, though I am of a beleif that it is somehow related to sitting in a circle, singing Kum bay ah, though I am a little bit uncertain as how to spell Kum Bay Ah. ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/36 "2005-12-13T05:10:12Z")
Profitting from people’s ignorance since 1973. ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/37 "2005-12-13T05:11:01Z")
> [@Taber](#): > > I do not fully comprehend the nature of the more colloquial phrase that this lengthy description corresponds with, though I am of a beleif that it is somehow related to sitting in a circle, singing Kum bay ah, though I am a little bit uncertain as how to spell Kum Bay Ah. in addition to sitting in a cricle and singing Kum Bay Ah, there may also be an element of hand holding which I had neglected to mention on my first post on the topic of closed curve, phlange interlocking Gullah songs ---
**Author:** ![nivlac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3bc359/32.png) [@nivlac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nivlac)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/38 "2005-12-13T05:27:34Z")
People of an agreeable nature will fail to win any contest in which they are competing. ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/39 "2005-12-13T05:34:30Z")
All the news that’s fit to print, as permitted by the increasingly restrictive nature of profit oriented and consumer fear driven conglomerate-media entities. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/40 "2005-12-13T05:46:19Z")
> [@Askia](#): > > All the news that’s fit to print, as permitted by the increasingly restrictive nature of profit oriented and consumer fear driven conglomerate-media entities. …and with varying degrees of reliability regarding content and authority as evidenced by [recent](http://www.slate.com/id/2082741/) [scandals](http://www.poynter.org/content/content_view.asp?id=35531). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206.md?page=3)