# rephrase a humorous statement to make it more accurate **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 12, 2005, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206 "2005-12-12T03:02:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2005, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/41 "2005-12-13T16:25:21Z")
There have been quite a few corpulent songstresses. Many of them have been known to offer their talents toward the end of festivities of varying sorts. It has been observed by some whose interpretation of this phenomenon is that one causes the other that the festivities cannot be concluded until the singing has been done by one of these hefty ladies. This is not true but it does make for amusing variations, the most famous being that the ceremonies are not finished until they have been finished. This is known in logic circles as a tautology. There are others. ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2005, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/42 "2005-12-15T13:48:42Z")
So, did the fat lady sing on this thread? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/43 "2006-02-01T17:21:13Z")
A barrel of monkeys is actually not all that fun, and really, kind of horrifying. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/44 "2006-02-01T17:33:45Z")
A bird in the hand is worth watching your cat freak. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/45 "2006-02-01T17:51:21Z")
If x = “Winning” and y = “Everything” then x \<\> y. In fact, ~d equals the null set. The enormity of the task requires some time, much as the capital of Italy required a fair bit of time, more than one day, to complete it’s construction. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/46 "2006-02-01T18:20:13Z")
This collection of message board posts bears resemblance to necromantically-reanimated corpses, akin to those that purportedly reanimate and take over the world in many motion pictures produced with low budgets. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/47 "2006-02-01T18:27:39Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > If x = “Winning” and y = “Everything” then x \<\> y. In fact, ~d equals the null set. If x = “Winning” and y = “Everything” then x \<\> y. In fact, ~ **x** equals the null set. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/48 "2006-02-01T18:48:59Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > This collection of message board posts bears resemblance to necromantically-reanimated corpses, akin to those that purportedly reanimate and take over the world in many motion pictures produced with low budgets. A post of remarkable prescience, in spite of the delay in the large person’s aria. Mayhap the reference to the creatures will forestall the falling of the axe upon this venture. Who’s to say that the timeliness of this quest has boundaries? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/49 "2006-02-01T19:12:32Z")
While all guns are not necessarily always loaded, in order to prevent a potentally fatal accidental (or, to describe it more accurately, negligent) discharge, it is safer to handle all guns as if they are, in fact, loaded. ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2006, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206/50 "2006-02-01T21:20:42Z")
Any comparison of life with female dogs fails because the latter is merely an infinitessimal subset of the former with no other points of similarity. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rephrase-a-humorous-statement-to-make-it-more-accurate/335206.md?page=2)