# Replcement for "Pot calling the kettle black" **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 22, 2004, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383 "2004-07-22T18:18:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![lynxie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e99b99/32.png) [@lynxie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lynxie)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/41 "2004-07-24T07:25:40Z")
The perfect generic insult… It takes one to know one. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/42 "2004-07-24T10:53:23Z")
> [@calm kiwi](#): > > Kiwis (this may offend the more classy Kiwi) are big on minimalist speech (ok not as much as Aussies maybe). Common phrases here include “sweet as”, “good as”, “bad as”, “black as”. You get the picture. > Try it. You might like it 😃 Th pu np, kl. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Dog80](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@Dog80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dog80)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/43 "2004-07-24T12:48:07Z")
In Greece we say “The donkey called the rooster big-headed” ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/44 "2004-07-24T15:13:09Z")
Where I’m from, we say, “Shut the hell up, moron, before I whack you up side your side with a two by four with a nail sticking out of it!” Seems to work most times. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/45 "2004-07-24T15:19:05Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > “Shut the hell up, moron, before I whack you up side your HEAD with a two by four with a nail sticking out of it!” :smack: Notice how much better it works with the right words in place? C-O-F-F-E-E… ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/46 "2004-07-24T21:13:18Z")
“That’s like (political commentator) calling (political commentator) a liar!” I took the names out, because I’m running a bit rich on venom these days. I gotta watch myself. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wonko_The_Sane)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2004, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/47 "2004-07-25T13:37:23Z")
Hi, I’m Mr. Kettle- You must me Mr Pot… ---
**Author:** ![calm\_kiwi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc348/32.png) [@calm\_kiwi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/calm_kiwi)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2004, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/48 "2004-07-25T13:54:51Z")
> [@Go You Big Red Fire Engine](#): > > Th pu np, kl. 😉 Friggin Ockers 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2004, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383/49 "2004-07-25T18:33:25Z")
> [@PussyCow](#): > > I say use it. We’re supposed to fight ignorance, right? > If you can see someone gets offended, gently tell them the definition. Enlighten them! Maybe you can think up an example of a word that sounds nasty but isn’t as an example (I can’t right now). Maybe that’s a good idea in La La Land, or wherever the hell it is that you reside, but around here…not such a good idea. (Oy, I can just imagine it. There I am, making my transfer at Newark Penn Station, when some crackwhore asks me for money. “Well, dear lady, I hope you don’t think I’m being niggardly…” Yeah, I’m sure she’ll wait to start beating me to a bloody pulp so that I can “gently tell her the definition,” “enlighten her,” and “think up an example of another word that sounds nasty but isn’t.” My dying utterance will be “A faggot is a bunch of sticks! A bunch of sticks!”) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/replcement-for-pot-calling-the-kettle-black/256383.md?page=2)