# Republican Ketchup **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 7, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974 "2004-07-07T18:22:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cmason32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmason32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmason32)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/1 "2004-07-07T18:22:20Z")
Are you tired of using that pansy, liberal ketchup? Do you want a more conservative ketchup that screams “bring it on!” to any wrong-doers? Well, do I have a product for you. No longer will you have to use ketchup that supports abortion and homo-sexual marriage. This is a man’s ketchup - the kind that makes you proud to be an American. Because if you use that other brand, you’re probably a gay liberal who hates America. [http://www.wketchup.com/](http://www.wketchup.com/) ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/2 "2004-07-07T18:25:37Z")
Ahhh, let 'em eat Hunt’s. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/3 "2004-07-07T18:28:39Z")
A true liberal uses mustard. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/4 "2004-07-07T18:31:01Z")
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**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/5 "2004-07-07T18:32:03Z")
Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon? ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/6 "2004-07-07T18:56:46Z")
I’m a true libertarian…I use steak sauce. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/7 "2004-07-07T19:09:23Z")
I’m Canadian… I use maple syrup. 🙂 What? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/8 "2004-07-07T19:19:45Z")
I dunk my fries in the blood of the oppressed before I use it to grease the machinery of capitalism. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/9 "2004-07-07T20:06:31Z")
I find this tragic, on many, many levels. First of all, I was an usher at John Heinz’s funeral. He was a good and decent man, and a great American. And, he was a good Republican to boot. Now, all of his money is being used to put a Democrat into office. Ant to top it all off, some wag has come up with so-called “Republican” ketchup. The Heinz company has nothing to do with John Kerry’s campaign. I may be a Republican, but I’m a native 'yinzer first. And in Pittsburgh, there may as well be only one brand of ketchup. Hell, I have family still working at the pickle plant. Screw political ketchup. I’ll dip my “Dirty O” or Potato Patch fries in Heinz ketchup, like God intended. ---
**Author:** ![cmason32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmason32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmason32)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/10 "2004-07-07T20:24:12Z")
> [@Mr. Moto](#): > > Now, all of his money is being used to put a Democrat into office. All of his money? I thought Kerry couldn’t use his wife’s money to run for office. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/11 "2004-07-07T20:31:07Z")
Do you think he could have afforded the house he mortgaged, to finance his run at the beginning, on a Senate salary? It may have been partially in his name, but she’s the one who actually bought the place, with old Heinz money. ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/12 "2004-07-07T20:32:46Z")
Don’t forget to pick up some [Star Spangled Ice Cream](http://www.starspangledicecream.com/) too - the Ice Cream with a Conservative Flavor. ---
**Author:** ![cmason32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmason32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmason32)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/13 "2004-07-07T20:41:07Z")
> [@Mr. Moto](#): > > Do you think he could have afforded the house he mortgaged, to finance his run at the beginning, on a Senate salary? > > It may have been partially in his name, but she’s the one who actually bought the place, with old Heinz money. So because they have a house together _all of his money_ is going to help elect a candidate? ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/14 "2004-07-07T20:42:47Z")
mmmmmmmm… vanilla & sanctimony. ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/15 "2004-07-07T20:48:30Z")
That site is sick. I mean look at the following quote from this [page:](http://www.wketchup.com/comments/) > [@](#): > > Great item and I love your pitch. I ordered a case and will slug it with some USA Prime Beef down upon arrival! God Bless America. > — S.S., New York City Ketchup on USA Prime Beef? Sheesh, what a communist! ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/16 "2004-07-07T21:45:04Z")
> [@Mr. Moto](#): > > Now, all of his money is being used to put a Democrat into office. His money? If i’m not greatly mistaken, he’s dead. Teresa inherited the money, which means that it is now hers, does it not. After all, i was under the impression that conservatives, in their opposition to measures like the inheritance (or “death”) tax, firmly believe that money handed down from parents to children belongs to the inheritor alone, and that it’s no-one else’s business what gets done with it. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/17 "2004-07-07T21:46:16Z")
> [@Amp](#): > > Ketchup on USA Prime Beef? Sheesh, what a communist! Putting ketchup on hot dogs ought to be a high crime as well, while we’re at it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/18 "2004-07-07T22:26:33Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > I’m Canadian… I use maple syrup. 🙂 > > What? I thought you guys used Mayo. At least that’s the idea I got from Candian Bacon. “Think of your children pledging allegiance to the maple leaf. Mayonnaise on everything. Winter 11 months of the year. Anne Murray - all day, every day.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/19 "2004-07-07T23:18:02Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > His money? > > If i’m not greatly mistaken, he’s dead. > > Teresa inherited the money, which means that it is now hers, does it not. > > After all, i was under the impression that conservatives, in their opposition to measures like the inheritance (or “death”) tax, firmly believe that money handed down from parents to children belongs to the inheritor alone, and that it’s no-one else’s business what gets done with it. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzziiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggg!!! Direct hit in the pomposity aorta! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2004, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974/20 "2004-07-07T23:42:31Z")
> [@Mr. Moto](#): > > I’ll dip my “Dirty O” … in Heinz ketchup, like God intended. Dude. Don’t squat in the condiments. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/republican-ketchup/253974.md?page=2)