# Request to all international soccer fans: STOP THAT FUCKING BUZZING! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 12, 2010, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942 "2010-06-12T18:49:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/201 "2010-06-14T17:55:47Z")
I think I understand the American aversion to soccer along the concept of: it’s boring because the scores are so low. I blame basketball, a sport where a “goal” is worth from 1 to 3 points, and yet games routinely reach triple digits, and they still tie. Here’s what I propose for this goofy sport: spot each team 100 points and let them play for about 3 minutes of game time … that seems to be the only thing that makes a fucking difference in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![5-HT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/f19dbf/32.png) [@5-HT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5-HT)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/202 "2010-06-14T18:55:35Z")
I’ve never understood why so many of my fellow americans get so angry about the fact that for 1 month every 4 years we soccer fans get to actually see high quality football on ESPN. its even on in the morning and early afternoon, surely if you don’t like it its not that hard to avoid. those horns though, yeah, they’re fucking awful. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/203 "2010-06-14T18:55:40Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > Being bored when you don’t know strategy is true of every single sport there is. I don’t like baseball. You know why? Because I don’t get the strategy. To me it’s two people playing catch with occasional ass-scratching and half-assed running. You probably think soccer is that Simpsons parody. The difference is that soccer fans aren’t calling you simple-minded fuckwits for a different preference. The strategy for me is only half the deal; I largely ignored soccer until the last couple years. So in order to spark my interest, I picked my team, followed them and their progress (Man U!). After a while I came to understand that it’s a more complicated than I realized, and made my peace, but I still ended up hating the game. The idea that a game can be played without a clear victor makes the game by itself pointless to me. Baseball is boring, for sure, that’s why we drink, but at any moment the pitcher can throw the ball and the batter can hit it, and that ball can fly out of the park or into the stands. The game can change in innumerable ways with every at bat. Soccer? Not so much, and in baseball, nobody leaves until somebody _wins the game._ In general I understand the appeal, but on a smaller scale, that the game could and often does end in a draw? :o \ **Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/204 "2010-06-14T19:00:16Z") > [@buttonjockey308](#): > > In general I understand the appeal, but on a smaller scale, that the game could and often does end in a draw? :o \ **Author:** ![yendis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ed8c4c/32.png) [@yendis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yendis)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/205 "2010-06-14T19:06:41Z") > [@Guinastasia](#): > > I flipped the WC on to see how bad it was – fortunately the commentator was louder, but damn, that’s annoying. South Africa wasn’t even PLAYING. (It was Cameroon vs. Japan). Hell, they showed highlights from the Netherlands playing Denmark and those damned things were STILL buzzing. WTF!!! Tourists are buying vuvuzelas by the armload, also [makarapa](http://www.makarapa.co.za/)in their own colours, and are having a blast joining in with the rest of the crowd. And as I said somewhere previously in this thread, there will be South Africans and vuvuzelas at every single match. VUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVUVU!!! ---
**Author:** ![5-HT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/f19dbf/32.png) [@5-HT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5-HT)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/206 "2010-06-14T19:20:01Z")
> [@buttonjockey308](#): > > The strategy for me is only half the deal; > > I largely ignored soccer until the last couple years. So in order to spark my interest, I picked my team, followed them and their progress (Man U!). After a while I came to understand that it’s a more complicated than I realized, and made my peace, but I still ended up hating the game. The idea that a game can be played without a clear victor makes the game by itself pointless to me. > > Baseball is boring, for sure, that’s why we drink, but at any moment the pitcher can throw the ball and the batter can hit it, and that ball can fly out of the park or into the stands. The game can change in innumerable ways with every at bat. Soccer? Not so much, and in baseball, nobody leaves until somebody _wins the game._ In general I understand the appeal, but on a smaller scale, that the game could and often does end in a draw? :o \ **Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/207 "2010-06-14T19:57:08Z") > [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > I think I understand the American aversion to soccer along the concept of: it’s boring because the scores are so low. I blame basketball, a sport where a “goal” is worth from 1 to 3 points, and yet games routinely reach triple digits, and they still tie. But if that were the case, the NHL wouldn’t exist here in the States, yet it does. A Canadian team (Montreal) hasn’t won the Cup since 1993. Since then it’s been won by American teams. You should have seen it here in Pittsburgh the last few months! Mind you, I’m not knocking soccer per se. I’m not a fan, but then I don’t like baseball or basketball either. (I prefer football and hockey) **yendis** – I wasn’t aware of that. But the rest of what I said, stands. If you insist on using the damned things, wait until your team scores a fucking goal. (Question – in VERY simple terms, if it goes to a tie, why not over-time?) ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/208 "2010-06-14T20:07:48Z")
Because the aim is to amass points over a series of 90 minute games.( zero points for a defeat, 1 pt for a draw, and 3 pts for a win.) If it were a knock-out stage, there would be extra-time, and then penalties if it still hadn’t been decided. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/209 "2010-06-14T20:27:25Z")
> [@Speak\_to\_me\_Maddie](#): > > It is the World Cup being hosted in South Africa. It belongs to the world. The world is competing, the world is watching, and it is a world event. South Africa is merely the host. A matter of interpretation perhaps. Yes, it’s a world event, but it’s South Africa’s world event. For me, what that basically means is that the sensibilities of people who are _there_ are more important than those of people who are just watching television coverage. > [@Guinastasia](#): > > “South Africa’s Cup” my ass. That’s like saying that the this year’s Winter Olympics were “Canada’s Olympics” because they were held in Vancouver. :rolleyes: I’m glad somebody made this analogy. That is _precisely_ how the recent Olympics were described–over and over again–in the coverage I read and watched (from the States). The Olympics, even more than the World Cup, have an explicit tradition of each iteration being a presentation by and of the host country. > [@Speak\_to\_me\_Maddie](#): > > If South Africans want to play their horns at South African matches then so be it, but they have no business showing up to the Italy/Paraguay match blowing on their fucking kazoos for two hours with no intention whatsoever in actually watching the sport. What makes you think they’re not watching? For that matter, what makes you think the kazoos are all being blown by South Africans? Despite the widespread complaints by viewers at home, non-Africans who are _there_ seem to be picking up the practice as often as hating on it. > [@Speak\_to\_me\_Maddie](#): > > South Africans have no concept of what it means to be a good host. The goal of hosting (whether it be a dinner party or a world event) is to make your guests comfortable and provide them with a good time. Hosting is not about the host, it is about the guests. If the host has a good time at the expense of the guests then the host has failed miserably. True in some respects… though a guest who expects his every custom and preference from back home to be catered to has no concept of what it means to be a good guest, or a good traveler. ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/210 "2010-06-14T20:28:54Z")
The weird things is, whenever the camera pans over the crowd I can never see anyone actually “playing” one. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/211 "2010-06-14T20:32:02Z")
I was reading this thread for amusement, since you couldn’t pay me to watch soccer. Then I made the mistake of hitting the local Chinese buffet for lunch today. Guess what was on every TV in the place? There need to be riots where people are pummeled for playing those things. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/212 "2010-06-14T20:34:40Z")
> [@amanset](#): > > The weird things is, whenever the camera pans over the crowd I can never see anyone actually “playing” one. I know; I’ve noticed that too. Are we sure it’s not just a couple of people with amplified vuvuzelas? ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/213 "2010-06-14T20:36:10Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > There need to be riots where people are pummeled… I think the organizers went to some lengths to keep the English from bringing _their_ football traditions to the show this time. ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/214 "2010-06-14T20:38:08Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > I know; I’ve noticed that too. > > Are we sure it’s not just a couple of people with amplified vuvuzelas? My theory is that is just the proles in the cheap seats. ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/215 "2010-06-14T20:38:29Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > The main common bond here, of course, is that both groups are a lot more masculine than British men. Tell that to [this lot](http://www.lightstalkers.org/images/show/616517), if you dare. Of course the idea that British women don’t like football is utter bollocks. SanVito. British. Female. Aston Villa fan. Ing-er-laand Ing-er-laand Ing-er-laand ---
**Author:** ![amanset](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8dc957/32.png) [@amanset](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amanset)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/216 "2010-06-14T20:39:13Z")
> [@spark240](#): > > I think the organizers went to some lengths to keep the English from bringing _their_ football traditions to the show this time. What, losing on penalties to the Germans? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/217 "2010-06-14T20:44:27Z")
I had an amplified vuvuzela once. Shot of penicillin cleared it right up. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/218 "2010-06-14T21:00:16Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > I think I understand the American aversion to soccer along the concept of: it’s boring because the scores are so low. I blame basketball, a sport where a “goal” is worth from 1 to 3 points, and yet games routinely reach triple digits, and they still tie. There are no ties in basketball. If there’s a tie after a regulation game, they play overtime periods until someone wins. The problem for soccer is not just that it’s low scoring, and it’s not even ties - there are ties in football, but you only see one or two of them per season. It’s the lack of scoring chances. There are not many compared to football, baseball, or basketball, or even hockey (which is much less popular than the other three). The field is huge and sometimes there are long gaps between the times the teams even have a chance to score. That’s the problem. That and the perception that soccer is a game played by uncoordinated kids who just huddle around the ball until the whistle blows. ---
**Author:** ![BwanaBob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bwanabob/32/2985_2.png) [@BwanaBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BwanaBob)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/219 "2010-06-14T21:06:05Z")
> [@Babale](#): > > I don’t LIKE the buzzing sound (I loved the chanting and singing other countries had) but I also respect it. It’s South African culture, and they have generously agreed to host the cup. As long as the games are on their turf, I can take it. > > If this spreads to other countries, though… I think if people realized they’d have to put up with that buzzing, South Africa wouldn’t have been chosen as host. Easiest way to stop this is to complain to sponsors. They will either put pressure on FIFA to get rid of those things, or they’ll find it harder to get sponsors next time around. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942/220 "2010-06-14T21:17:22Z")
[Apparently, the inventor was a big admirer of Saddam Hussein](http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2009/dec/22/vuvuzela-ownership-row). > [@](#): > > “I’m a man who loves a challenge. That’s why they call me Saddam. I love Saddam Hussein because he died protecting his country. I’m also protecting my country.” Says it all really, the torturing bastard! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/request-to-all-international-soccer-fans-stop-that-fucking-buzzing/542942.md?page=12)