# Requesting: tales of people being inappropriately dressed
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [July 17, 2014, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328 "2014-07-17T02:31:43Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 7
### Author:  [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/121 "2014-07-20T03:18:55Z")
> [@kayaker](#):
>
> Is it ever appropriate to stand up and point out the utter hypocrisy of the bride wearing white? đ
As was stated earlier, that started with Queen Victoria, and no virginal symbolism was intended. No one would have questioned her!
Iâve also heard it was a way to show you had money. Many brides just wore their best Sunday dresse for their weddings, but wearing a white gown shows you had enough money to buy a new, impractical gown for the day. Unlike a nice church-type dress, you werenât going to wear this one again.
---
### Author:  [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/122 "2014-07-20T06:32:08Z")
The scene: A stone tower by the shore in Narragansett, Rhode Island.
The players: The bride and groomâs family, all of WASP and Irish-Catholic extraction.
The atmosphere: About as âNew Englandâ as it gets.
The brideâs cousin wore a fancy sari and the cousinâs husband wore one of those tunic outfits that Indian men wear to formal occasions.
As maid of honor, my main duty turned out to be answering questions about these two.
âAre they Indian? They donât look Indian.â âTheyâre not.â
âHave they been to India recently or something.â âNope.â
âAre they, like, Hindu converts?â Nope.
âDo they have any connection at all to India or Indian things?â âNot that anyone knows of.â
âThen why the hell are they wearing that?â
That was 12 years ago, and it still remains a mystery.
The outfits were appropriate in terms of level of dressiness for the occasion, but inappropriate anyway. They looked like ridiculous attention seekers. If they were Indian, they would have been fine. Everyone would have just thought âhey, nice sari!â and thought no more about it.
> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> At the public liberry one sees some pretty interesting fashion choices. I fondly remember âboobs tucked into pants ladyâ. Wonder what ever happened to her?
[She went to Wal-Mart](http://www.angelfire.com/ak2/intelligencerreport/images/walmart58.jpg)
---
### Author:  [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/123 "2014-07-20T10:04:01Z")
> [@dropzone](#):
>
> My, you Catholics are prigs!
No, we just expect guests to dress as requested on the invitation. The guests in the cases I described werenât offending Catholicism; they were offending the bride and groom and their families. And good taste too, of course.
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/124 "2014-07-20T11:24:55Z")
I once wore a suit to a friendâs wedding - I had some business thing beforehand, and hadnât bothered to change. Boy, did everyone laugh. Said I was trying to upstage the groom.
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### Author:  [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/125 "2014-07-20T11:55:27Z")
My mother attended a funeral at her church. The daughter of one of the ministers had been murdered. She knew the parents well, they were devastated of course.
Thank goodness for funeral home assistants. Apparently some of the deceased friends showed up in ratty attire, although nothing could be done about it at that point. But the guys left their backwards facing ball caps on, and the director could lean over and whisper to âTake off your hats!â And they did.
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### Author:  [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/126 "2014-07-20T16:28:17Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> I once wore a suit to a friendâs wedding - I had some business thing beforehand, and hadnât bothered to change. Boy, did everyone laugh. Said I was trying to upstage the groom.
I have a friend who is a professional violinist. He plays in a quartet, as well as taking solo gigs. He has a full array of formal and semi-formal wear for day and evening. He once get an invitation to a wedding that said âformal attire,â on it. He decided against wearing white tie and tails, because he didnât think most people actually meant that when they said âformal,â because he didnât see guests dressed like that very often at occasion where he played, even when he was specifically asked to wear tails. So he wore a tux and black tie, with a striped vest for a little whimsy.
He got accosted by the bride when he got there, and accused also of essentially trying to upstage the groom. He didnât even bother to try to explain that a tux wasnât even the most formal of attire. He went back to his car, drove to the nearest store-- a Walmart, or something, bought a straight tie, and returned. Nothing more was said.
He told me it was one of those weddings where the groom was in black tie and vest, while the groomsmen were in colored ties and cummerbunds that matched the dresses of the bridesmaids they escorted-- whose dresses were identical, except for being different colors.
I asked what the other men were wearing, and he said mostly business suits, except for a couple of clods in dockers and sports coats, and the groomâs father, who was in a military dress uniform. He learned something about what some people consider âformal.â
Me, I once got lectured for wearing regular work clothes on âcasual Friday.â All the jeans I owned (and this is still true), are the loose-fitting type with cargo pockets, and at the time were all pretty worn. Also, the dress code in this place wasnât very strict, so everyday work clothes could be dockers and a Polo shirt, or a broomstick skirt and a very casual sweater. It wasnât called âdenim Fridayâ; it was called âcasual Friday.â But, I went out and bought a pair of nice Levis, that werenât loose-fit, carpenter, or cargo. Wore them to work every goddam Friday. Never any other time. They werenât as comfortable as most of my other work clothes.
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### Author:  [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/127 "2014-07-20T16:57:48Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#):
>
> He told me it was one of those weddings where the groom was in black tie and vest, while the groomsmen were in colored ties and cummerbunds that matched the dresses of the bridesmaids they escorted-- whose dresses were identical, except for being different colors.
Iâm far from dapper, but even I know that ainât formal wear; thatâs a high school prom. :smack: đ
---
### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/128 "2014-07-20T17:06:52Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#):
>
> I have a friend who is a professional violinist. He plays in a quartet, as well as taking solo gigs. He has a full array of formal and semi-formal wear for day and evening. He once get an invitation to a wedding that said âformal attire,â on it. He decided against wearing white tie and tails, because he didnât think most people actually meant that when they said âformal,â because he didnât see guests dressed like that very often at occasion where he played, even when he was specifically asked to wear tails. So he wore a tux and black tie, with a striped vest for a little whimsy.
>
> He got accosted by the bride when he got there, and accused also of essentially trying to upstage the groom. He didnât even bother to try to explain that a tux wasnât even the most formal of attire. He went back to his car, drove to the nearest store-- a Walmart, or something, bought a straight tie, and returned. Nothing more was said.
>
> He told me it was one of those weddings where the groom was in black tie and vest, while the groomsmen were in colored ties and cummerbunds that matched the dresses of the bridesmaids they escorted-- whose dresses were identical, except for being different colors.
>
> I asked what the other men were wearing, and he said mostly business suits, except for a couple of clods in dockers and sports coats, and the groomâs father, who was in a military dress uniform. He learned something about what some people consider âformal.â
>
> Me, I once got lectured for wearing regular work clothes on âcasual Friday.â All the jeans I owned (and this is still true), are the loose-fitting type with cargo pockets, and at the time were all pretty worn. Also, the dress code in this place wasnât very strict, so everyday work clothes could be dockers and a Polo shirt, or a broomstick skirt and a very casual sweater. It wasnât called âdenim Fridayâ; it was called âcasual Friday.â But, I went out and bought a pair of nice Levis, that werenât loose-fit, carpenter, or cargo. Wore them to work every goddam Friday. Never any other time. They werenât as comfortable as most of my other work clothes.
To be fair, it wasnât so much criticism as âDude, whatâs with the suit? Youâre already married!â
Israeli weddings are very informal. I wore a suit at mine, but at my sisterâs wedding, the only people in jacket and ties were guests from abroad. Showing up in jeans and a nice shirt isnât considered disrespectful or low-class - it just means that youâve come to have fun.
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### Author:  [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/129 "2014-07-20T17:15:23Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> To be fair, it wasnât so much criticism as âDude, whatâs with the suit? Youâre already married!â
No, it was criticism. From the way he told it, the bride was mad. She considered a tux some kind of wedding uniform (probably would have had the groom wear one even if theyâd gotten married at 11am), and he was sort of an audience member who showed up in the costume of one of the actors. âThis is a serious show, not _The Rocky Horror Picture_, dude!â was what it came down to, I think.
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/130 "2014-07-20T18:08:25Z")
I was talking about my story, not yours.
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### Author:  [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)
#### Post date: [July 20, 2014, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/131 "2014-07-20T18:44:51Z")
> [@Alessan](#):
>
> I was talking about my story, not yours.
Forgive me for thinking you were; the comment came after you quoted my post.
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### Author:  [@Timetrvlr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Timetrvlr)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/132 "2014-07-21T03:39:23Z")
Most embarrassing for me was wearing a 3-piece business suit to an out-of-town job interview. Both the regional sales manager and the branch manager that interviewed me were dressed in cowboy boots, jeans and work shirts. I was hired but they insisted I wear blue jeans to work.
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### Author:  [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/133 "2014-07-21T11:40:54Z")
> [@Diceman](#):
>
> Maybe a year ago, a man & woman showed up for sunday mass at my church. Mohawk haircuts (dyed blue & pink, respectively), leather clothes (including leather pants), and multiple piercings. The girl had a chain that connected her ear to her nose. Very much not the sort who you expect to see at a catholic church in the suburbs. As far as I know, there wasnât any kind of punk rock festival going on, nor were they shooting a new Mad Max movie. Iâm an usher at my church; I did my best not to cringe as I greeted them, but I donât think I succeeded.
Yep, if thereâs a group of people that definitely should not be in church itâs the prostitutes, the tax collectors, and the punk rockers. Jesus surely did not preach to those people, he told us that the only people who needed saving were the ones who dressed up on Sundays. đ
Anyway, I have a couple of inappropriately dresses stories, the first was the summer where I worked at my friendâs dadâs billboard business off and on. The one fulltime guy there had a court appearance in the morning for his divorcee proceedings and bragged in the afternoon that he wore some kind of inappropriate T-shirt and his green army pants and was lippy to the judge. He was one of those crazy âLibertarianâ types who said that he wanted the government to stay out of his trailer, but mostly he just didnât want the cops raiding his crops.
The second was when I got out of college and was looking to get my first job. I was looking to do PR and I had an interview with this small Northshore firm. I had a suit but my thoughts were that I wanted to save that suit for a second interview should that occur. So I had brown slacks and a jacket that matched it and a green tie. I thought it looked really good and I went into the interview, talked to the owner of the firm who was dressed casually but had the makeup caked on and the bright red lipstick. The only other person in the office was a high school kid who was wearing a T-shirt and jeans so when I did the interview and I thought I did well. She then had me write a couple of press releases and I thought that I did well there also â I consider myself a good writer (even though it doesnât always show here) and crafting press releases was something I liked to do. This whole process took a big chunk of my afternoon and then she called me back into her office for feedback and critiqued my writing. I remember that I made one mistake, possibly writing the date or something, and she pointed that out and I tired to make a joke out of it but that seemed to fly right over her head. Everything seemed OK to me until the tone of the conversation shifted when she said âYou donât want to work here.â
Huh-what?
âYou donât want to work here,â she repeated (she said this several times, in fact). âJust look at the way youâre dressed. Donât ever wear khakis to an interview.â
She went on and on about the khakis and yeah, I guess she had a point there, but she kept talking about them and then finally said âI donât think I can pay what youâre looking for anyway. You should interview at a firm downtown.â
Ah OK, itâs a one woman show and sheâs cheap. I got it. I did explain that I just got out of school and Iâm looking to get my foot in the door anywhere I could but that didnât fly. Obviously, if she didnât want me working there then I wouldnât want to be there but it really was an odd situation.
I did have one takeaway though and I wore my suit to interviews after that.
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### Author:  [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/134 "2014-07-21T12:20:48Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> I remember once being at my wifeâs (then girlfriendâs) house, and her roommate was getting ready to go see a movie with this cute guy in her class. She was a landscape architect student, in a very get-your-hands-dirty program, so she was looking forward to the date and spent an hour or so getting all dolled up: hair done, tasteful makeup, lovely dress, jewelry, everything.
>
> At last the guy shows up. Heâs in a t-shirt, jeans, and baseball cap, and clearly flummoxed as soon as he sees her. I donât know which of them was dressed inappropriately, but we never heard anything more about this guy.
This seems to be SOP in this college town. Any Saturday night you can sit downtown and watch the girls teeter by in their high heels and skimpy dresses, accompanied by their boyfriends in T-shirts and cargo shorts.
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### Author:  [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/135 "2014-07-21T14:03:34Z")
I hate that I even know this, but apparently Jaden Smith (son of actor Will Smith) attended the wedding of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West [dressed in a white Batman suit.](http://www.vibe.com/sites/vibe.com/files/styles/main_image/public/article_images/Jaden-Smith-Kimye-Wedding.png) Talk about attention-whoring.
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### Author:  [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/136 "2014-07-21T14:27:40Z")
Brand new one at church, just this past Sunday. A lady came in wearing pink stretchy pants. Stretchy pants are not unusual these days, even in church. However, this lady was, ahem, of considerable circumfrence around the hips, and she apparently got some of those LuluLemon pants that were recalled because they become see-through when worn. You could easily see her underwear showing through the pants. It was black (or some dark color, at least), and it appeared to be bikini cut. I hope she was blissfully unaware of her status as a walking wardrobe malfunction, because the alternative is that she just didnât care that strangers could describe her panties in exacting detail.
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### Author:  [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)
#### Post date: [July 21, 2014, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/137 "2014-07-21T15:46:25Z")
Iâve worn stuff at various times in my life I would at least think twice about now. For most of college I wore a SS tunic/uniform coat every day and never thought twice about it. It was the 70s at a state university and the look was more like an escapee from Clockwork Orange than racist. I never wore it at the YMHA or any place like that; I wasnât totally insensative. But it fit great, looked kick ass cool on the bike, and was comfortable year round.
Donât know if I would wear it today (luckily its way too small for me today so its a moot point) - and Iâm not so sure Iâm happy about that. But that gets into more a GD than an opinion.
(I do wear my current colors to and from worship. But I iincluded a patch saying âThese ARE my church clothesâ so I figure congregations can consider themselves warned.)
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### Author:  [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)
#### Post date: [July 22, 2014, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/138 "2014-07-22T03:36:16Z")
My old boss used to be part of the interview committees for various high-level positions at our institution. I would always ask what kind of shoes the women wore because that says a lot about someone; he would always say heâs a guy and didnât notice such a thing. Come to find out one of the female applicants for a CFO-level position wore four-inch red stilettos. In the winter. In New Hampshire. I donât know that thatâs why she didnât get the job, but snow boots would have been more forgivable than that.
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### Author:  [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)
#### Post date: [July 22, 2014, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/139 "2014-07-22T05:34:10Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#):
>
> At the courthouse I work at, there is no particular dress code for people who are not court personnel (accused, witnesses, public, etc.)
>
> Still, it always startles me when someone who is plainly not indigent wears _completely_ casual clothing, particularly when theyâre the accused. Iâd have thought they would dress up at _least_ to the extent of a collared shirt and clean pants. If I were to be accused of a crime, Iâd want to come across as taking the whole matter as seriously as possible.
**Matt** , you would be very disappointed in some of the people I represent at court. Heck, sometimes, I am.
I occasionally act as âduty counsel,â or in other words, the lawyer of the day for anybody who wants one. Simply put, I am hired by Legal Aid to represent those criminally-accused who show up to court without a lawyer. And some of my clients dress ⌠interestingly, shall we say. Ripped jeans, T-shirts with various inappropriate slogans (yep, the F-word has appeared a few times), women wearing sweat pants with things like âJuicyâ embroidered on the butt. Regardless of what they are wearing, however, I do my best to represent them all.
Still, I had to give props to one client, whom I spotted arriving from the courthouse lobby. He arrived at court on his bike, in a plain T-shirt, bike shorts, and sandals. He also had a backpack. He parked and locked his bike, and his first stop inside the courthouse was the menâs room. He emerged in grey trousers, white collared dress shirt and tie, and shoes and socks. After his matter was dealt with (and I could tell that the judge and the Crown looked favourably upon himâI like to think it was because of because of my arguments, but I have to realize that it was also because of the effort he made to look good for court), he went back into the menâs room, changed back into his biking gear, and went on his way. A lesson for other accuseds, perhaps.
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### Author:  [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)
#### Post date: [July 22, 2014, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/requesting-tales-of-people-being-inappropriately-dressed/693328/140 "2014-07-22T06:13:10Z")
> [@kayaker](#):
>
> Is it ever appropriate to stand up and point out the utter hypocrisy of the bride wearing white? đ
Never. If I recall my Bosworth correctly, one is to stay seated, while shouting âWhore of Babylon!â
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