# Restroom Kobayashi Maru - Spontaneous Diarrhea & Vomit
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [November 30, 2006, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288 "2006-11-30T04:32:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/1 "2006-11-30T04:32:52Z")
Let’s say you had a sudden urge to vomit and diarrhea spontaneously. You rush to the restroom, drop your trousers, look at the toilet, then what?
Let’s say the restroom is a half-bath (i.e., no bathtub or shower).
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### Author:  [@St\_Ides](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/St_Ides)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/2 "2006-11-30T04:37:18Z")
Trust me… Sit on the toilet.
Cleaning up vomit is much better than cleaning up liquid feces. It just clogs the mop, then you have to keep wringing it and wringing it, then it breaks and you have to do it by hand… Um… Er… Theoretically…
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### Author:  [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/3 "2006-11-30T04:45:43Z")
McCoy should have given Saavik some Ipecac & Tijuana tap water.
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### Author:  [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/4 "2006-11-30T04:46:09Z")
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan. The reverse doesn’t work.
Or, hack the program to eliminate the urge to vomit.
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### Author:  [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/5 "2006-11-30T04:55:33Z")
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan. The reverse doesn’t work.
Or, hack the program to eliminate the urge to vomit.
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### Author:  [@Slypork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slypork)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/6 "2006-11-30T05:13:51Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Excellent]
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan. The reverse doesn’t work.
Or, hack the program to eliminate the urge to vomit.
[/QUOTE]
Only solution that works. Had to do that after getting a bad bleu cheese burger.
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### Author:  [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/7 "2006-11-30T05:34:41Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Excellent]
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan. The reverse doesn’t work.
Or, hack the program to eliminate the urge to vomit.
[/QUOTE]
There is no hack that will stop a core dump in progress.
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### Author:  [@Ace309](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ace309)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/8 "2006-11-30T05:34:54Z")
I was lucky enough in my childhood home to have a toilet that directly faced a small sink. God bless America.
I did have to wash a sink that contained a partially-digested philly cheese steak (mmm, food poisoning - the onions were the most disgusting part), but I’m perfectly happy to have flushed the other.
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### Author:  [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/9 "2006-11-30T11:38:29Z")
I’m so glad I’m not the only one thinking of these things.
When you’re taking a crap and you have to throw up, which one takes precedence? I’ve always assume that you would rather throw up in the bathtub than have to wash out the sink.
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### Author:  [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/10 "2006-11-30T12:44:18Z")
I’ve done that, also food poisoning. I also had the luxury of a bathtub next to the john, so I could do both simultaneously. Doing both at literally the same time was a weird sensation that was only topped by having an abdominal surgical drain pulled.
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### Author:  [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/11 "2006-11-30T15:32:28Z")
Sit down on the toilet and vomit between your legs. It’s still easier to clean up than anything else… I would guess, theoritically.
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### Author:  [@Lobelia\_Overhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobelia_Overhill)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/12 "2006-11-30T15:46:37Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Excellent]
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan. The reverse doesn’t work.
[/QUOTE]
Where were you when that happened to me two years ago??
:eek: ☹
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### Author:  [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/13 "2006-11-30T16:17:16Z")
Memo to self: replace carpet in bathrooms with tile ASAP.
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### Author:  [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/14 "2006-11-30T16:27:33Z")
Could you take the tank lid off and then let loose from both ends: fore- into the toilet tank, aft- into the bowl?
Seems to me that it might be the option with the least mess to clean up.
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### Author:  [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/15 "2006-11-30T16:32:52Z")
[QUOTE=bump]
Could you take the tank lid off and then let loose from both ends: fore- into the toilet tank, aft- into the bowl?
Seems to me that it might be the option with the least mess to clean up.
[/QUOTE]
Now THATS creative thinking!
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### Author:  [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/16 "2006-11-30T16:49:34Z")
Carpet in the bathroom? I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen that. That’s exactly the place you want to be able to mop, even more than the kitchen maybe.
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### Author:  [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/17 "2006-11-30T17:28:39Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Excellent]
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan.
[/QUOTE]
I had to do this once. In a restaurant. In the women’s washroom (I’m male).
Excuse while I deal with residual embarrassment leftover from 1997.
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### Author:  [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/18 "2006-11-30T18:27:50Z")
[QUOTE=Cardinal]
Carpet in the bathroom? I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen that. That’s exactly the place you want to be able to mop, even more than the kitchen maybe.
[/QUOTE]
Tell me about it; I’ve got rugs on the carpet, because I’ve got little nephews…
Seems to be a condo thing. I was gobsmacked when I moved in and realized I hadn’t noticed it. My parents told me it wasn’t something to worry about. They just bought a condo… with carpeted bathrooms. _snicker_
Anyway, _not_ something to accomodate people leaking at both ends!
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### Author:  [@Wheeljack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheeljack)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/19 "2006-11-30T18:38:23Z")
Sit on toilet, lean into bathtub if one is handy. The most useful thing I ever learned from drinking.
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### Author:  [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2006, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/restroom-kobayashi-maru-spontaneous-diarrhea-vomit/382288/20 "2006-11-30T20:48:11Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Excellent]
Sit on the toilet, grab the trashcan, vomit in the trashcan.
[/QUOTE]
Note to self: replace open-weave wicker trashcan in bathroom with a sturdy plastic one.
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