# Return of The Princess Bride Jedi??

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [January 6, 2001, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698 "2001-01-06T05:25:43Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 15\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\
**Post date:** [February 27, 2003, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/81 "2003-02-27T19:50:23Z")

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Hello. My name is Luke Skywalker. You are my father. Prepare to die!

Darth Vader: Stop Saying That!!!  
I acually did ‘bwwahahahahah’ out loud at this thread!🙂

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**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\
**Post date:** [February 27, 2003, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/82 "2003-02-27T20:32:01Z")

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I don’t know exactly why this thread got resurrected, but I really needed the laugh. I’d forgotten how damn FUNNY this one is!

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**Author:** ![AngusYoung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@AngusYoung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AngusYoung)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/83 "2003-07-15T19:41:30Z")

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I haven’t read this in a while so I thought I would come back to it and I just can’t help but post again…

Buttercup: “…I’ll be killing myself once we reach the honeymoon suite.”  
Han Solo: “Good, I hate long waits.”

* * *

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**Author:** ![Alpha\_Hannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Alpha\_Hannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Hannah)\
**Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/84 "2004-05-14T07:37:40Z")

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> [@screech-owl](#):
>
> This is now a bumpersticker for my car.

_I_ want that bumper sticker! That’s classic…this entire thread has me laughing so much I’m glad I’m not drinking like half the other people.

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**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\
**Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/85 "2004-05-14T14:04:09Z")

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You know, originally it was called _Revenge_ of the Princess Bride Jedi and if you have one of those teaser posters, they are worth a gazillion dollars!

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**Author:** ![luluBahrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e5b9ba/32.png) [@luluBahrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/luluBahrain)\
**Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/86 "2004-05-14T21:36:49Z")

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> [@Alpha\_Hannah](#):
>
> _I_ want that bumper sticker! That’s classic…this entire thread has me laughing so much I’m glad I’m not drinking like half the other people.

Well, they _have_ been done drinking now for the past several years.

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**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\
**Post date:** [May 14, 2004, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/87 "2004-05-14T21:45:39Z")

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Well, even though I’d read this thread at least twice, when I read it earlier I made the still-current mistake of trying to drink a soda while reading. I had to give up and finish the thread first. 🙂

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**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\
**Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/88 "2004-05-19T17:55:48Z")

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“True love is the greatest thing in the world, except for a nice  
JLT- Jawa, lettuce and tomato sandwich, when the Jawa is nice and lean. . .”

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**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\
**Post date:** [May 19, 2004, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/89 "2004-05-19T18:35:13Z")

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Ben: “Did you feel that disturbance in the force? That was the disturbance of ultimate suffering…”

Han “No, this one goes here, that one goes there”  
Chewie “Raaaaawwwwwwwr” (Subtitle: Yeah yeah, you’re very smart, shut up)

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**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\
**Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/90 "2004-05-20T03:14:51Z")

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> [@PaulGGa2](#):
>
> I do not have a copy of The Princess Bride or the Starwars trilogy on hand, and would appreciate it if someone would make a post involving the device that makes Westly nearly dead.

_3 years later, wish granted:_

Vader: Are you coming down to the cellblock? I’m starting the princess on **The Machine** tonight.

Tarkin: Darth, you know how much I love watching you work. But I’ve got the Empire’s 25th anniversary to plan, two 'droids to find, Alderaan to destroy, and the Rebellion to blame for it. I’m swamped.

Vader: Get some rest–if you haven’t got your health, you haven’t got anything.

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**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\
**Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/91 "2004-05-20T05:55:22Z")

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**Jaba the Hut** to **Princess Leia** : There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.

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**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\
**Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/92 "2004-05-20T07:10:33Z")

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Vader (to Boba Fett): And no disintegrations!  
Boba Fett: How about mostly disintegrated?

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [May 20, 2004, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/93 "2004-05-20T11:49:49Z")

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This thread is almost indescribably brilliant.

“You rush a Jedi, you get rotten miracles.”

“I can’t compete with you physically, and you’re no match for my brains.”  
“You’re that smart?”  
“Let me put it this way. Have you ever heard of Windu, Kenobi, Yoda?”  
“Yes.”  
“Morons.”

"Do you hear that, Fezzik? That is the sound of millions of voices crying out in terror and being suddenly silenced. My heart made that sound when the six-fingered man killed my father. The Force makes it now. "

“That’s no moon. It’s the Brute Squad.”

“And you… friendless, helpless, hopeless, brainless. Do you want me to send you back where I found you? Unemployed? On Tattooine?”

“Marraige is-a whassa bringin’ us hea’ today-sa. Marriage, dat-a blessed arrange-a-ment-sa…”

“Get some rest. If you haven’t got your Wookie, you haven’t got anything.”

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**Author:** ![Hello\_Lady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df788c/32.png) [@Hello\_Lady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Lady)\
**Post date:** [May 21, 2004, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/94 "2004-05-21T04:45:26Z")

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Oh man, I have to say thank you for resurrecting this thread. I haven’t laughed so hard in ages! 😃

I wish I could think of something to add. Maybe another time…

Cheers!

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**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\
**Post date:** [May 21, 2004, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-of-the-princess-bride-jedi/48698/95 "2004-05-21T13:52:27Z")

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Whenever I see Darth Vader, I hear the music of Jethro Tull’s “Aqualung.”

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