# Return to a liquor store because you can't stand the taste? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 23, 2013, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717 "2013-06-23T18:52:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/41 "2013-06-24T03:50:38Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > While it may or may not be strictly adheared to or enforced, t is illegal to return alcohol under federal law and most state laws. This includes unopened containers. > [@pkbites](#): > > Which, as I posted earlier, sounds reasonable to me. I wouldn’t hold your breath waiting for other states to follow, though. Would not a federal law apply in every state, including New York, Illinois, and Florida? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/42 "2013-06-24T04:36:28Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > No, the manufacturer is the real “Big Boy” in this case. I would sue them not only for the cost of the product but also another 100 grand or so for inconvenience and emotional distress caused by this whole ordeal. It is the American way. Making claims like this is a lot less impressive when nobody was saying it before you did. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/43 "2013-06-24T04:41:30Z")
Any opened bottle that’s returned is obviously just going into the garbage. Basically the store is going to make a decision balancing taking a loss of fifteen dollars against the possibility of losing future sales from you. I have to admit if I was a liquor store owner I wouldn’t do returns accept maybe to a handful of my best customers - and anyone who pushed it would not be on my best customer list. My advice to the OP is to suck it up, both metaphorically and literally. And in the future try new drinks in those little bottles they sell up by the counter. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/44 "2013-06-24T04:58:28Z")
> [@Alley\_Dweller](#): > > Would not a federal law apply in every state, including New York, Illinois, and Florida? I don’t know exactly what the federal law says. I thought I had a copy of it in some papers I got from the WI. Dept of Revenue when I went through alcohol compliance enforcement training but it wasn’t in there. ---
**Author:** ![ombre12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/d26b3c/32.png) [@ombre12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ombre12)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/45 "2013-06-24T10:01:20Z")
I tried mixing some of that coconut flavored vodka with a beer. Wasn’t half bad. Did make for a very strong beer with a somewhat malty flavor. But will definitely not go to waste. Problem solved. Will give the wife another $15 to buy something she likes in flavored vodkas. ---
**Author:** ![ombre12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/d26b3c/32.png) [@ombre12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ombre12)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/46 "2013-06-24T10:15:04Z")
> [@ombre12](#): > > I tried mixing some of that coconut flavored vodka with a beer. > > Wasn’t half bad. Did make for a very strong beer with a somewhat malty flavor. But will definitely not go to waste. > > Problem solved. Will give the wife another $15 to buy something she likes in flavored vodkas. > [@lieu](#): > > I’m pretty sure 1.75 liters of spit normally runs more than $15.00. What on Earth made you expect this was going to taste like anything other than medicinal swill? Actually I really liked something she bought a few months ago on sale for about $15 in flavored vodkas. It was a raspberry/chocolate flavored vodka mix. I thought she was absolutely insane for buying it and thought it would taste terrible. It turned out to be delicious alone and mixed well with most anything. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/47 "2013-06-24T14:33:32Z")
> [@ZenBeam](#): > > If you or your wife are trying something new, and don’t like it, suck it up and eat the cost yourself. Taking something back when there’s nothing wrong with it, just because you don’t like the taste, just reeks of entitlement to me, whether the store takes it back or not. Quote for truth. > [@ombre12](#): > > Her idea is to take it back to the liquor store and \*\*demand \*\*her money back. Does she actually \*\*demand \*\*her money back when she makes a bad decision and purchases something she doesn’t like? Because if she does, damn what an entitled bitch. ---
**Author:** ![ombre12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/d26b3c/32.png) [@ombre12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ombre12)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/48 "2013-06-24T16:49:06Z")
I would have talked her out of the “demanding” part. But I didn’t think it was doable in any way. From legal and other answers on this board I’m sure it isn’t really doable. I think I may grow to like coconut flavored vodka in my beer. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/49 "2013-06-24T17:12:13Z")
> [@ombre12](#): > > \ > Anyway she bought a 1.75 liter of coconut flavored vodka, because she read somewhere that coconut oil is good for you… Thank you for this bit of (unintentional?) hilarity. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/50 "2013-06-24T17:14:19Z")
It would never in a million years occur to me to “return” something to the liquor store. How odd. ---
**Author:** ![Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Living_Well_Is_Best_Revenge)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/51 "2013-06-24T17:15:21Z")
> [@August\_West](#): > > Thank you for this bit of (unintentional?) hilarity. The wife sounds like a real piece of work. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/52 "2013-06-24T17:28:46Z")
I think people are piling on too much. Yeah, the idea was strange, but that’s why the OP posted his question. ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/53 "2013-06-24T17:31:02Z")
She could return it and say it was ‘off’ like a corked wine, and could she swap if for something different (no, not another bottle, the whole batch may be bad) and while she’s there she needs a case of beer for you. The store could say ‘Sorry about that, no’ or ‘Sorry about that, sure’. Or just enjoy your coconut beer. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/54 "2013-06-24T18:14:54Z")
Once it’s opened, it’s used liquor. There isn’t much of a market for that. You’ve already wasted more than $15 worth of time discussing it. Add it to your liquor collection, maybe you will have a guest one day that likes it. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/55 "2013-06-24T18:24:23Z")
You could make [brownies](http://www.yummly.com/recipe/Coconut-brownies-356759). ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/56 "2013-06-24T18:39:18Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > But why would they LAUGH at you?? Or is that just a figure of speech? I expect they wouldn’t laugh right in your face. But you would have them rolling in the floor once they get back to the breakroom and would figure prominently in the hilarious work story swap they have with their friends. ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/57 "2013-06-24T20:01:35Z")
The actual hypothetical of this really is a little offputting. She buys an item, uses it, verifies that it is exactly what it is and is free of defects, and wants a refund because she didn’t like it. Barring a listed “satisfaction guaranteed” policy for the product, I can’t imagine why she’d expect the store to issue a refund. I’m genuinely curious what the thinking is. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/58 "2013-06-24T20:12:26Z")
I once found a green tea + mint flavor of toothpaste. Sounded intriguing so I thought I’d try it. Bleargh! It was nasty. But I’d opened and used some of it, so I didn’t feel right taking it back to the store. Instead, I went on the manufacturer’s website and wrote them a little note asking them if they would replace the tube with another flavor because I thought I would like this green tea toothpaste but it turned out to be vile. Sure enough, about a month later, I got a coupon for a free tube of toothpaste in the mail, so I went and got another flavor I liked better. So I’d go on the vodka company’s website and ask them if they would replace the coconut vodka with another flavor she’d like better. Maybe they’ll do it. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/59 "2013-06-24T20:49:38Z")
> [@typoink](#): > > The actual hypothetical of this really is a little offputting. > > She buys an item, uses it, verifies that it is exactly what it is and is free of defects, and wants a refund because she didn’t like it. > > Barring a listed “satisfaction guaranteed” policy for the product, I can’t imagine why she’d expect the store to issue a refund. > > I’m genuinely curious what the thinking is. Trader Joe’s is really good about this. I bought some tomato spread stuff (maybe it was a bruschetta spread- I can’t remember), and I took one bite and didn’t like it. It was not falsely advertised, I had read the ingredients, no one deceived me, but I just didn’t like it. When I took it back, there wasn’t one second of hesitation- they took it back immediately, no questions asked. I appreciated it and it built good will in my mind/heart toward the store. A retail establishment usually has as one of its goals not just moving a product, but _customer satisfaction_ with the product. Since you can buy the same stuff lots of places, the thing that distinguishes one retailer from another is an increasingly rare attribute: _service_. And for small businesses (I realize Trader Joe’s is not a small business) service can definitely set them apart from a mega-store. There was a small hardware store in the small town where I lived for 20 years. I always bought my appliances from them, even paying slightly extra, because they delivered, picked up stuff to repair when it wasn’t working, knew me by name, and provided a level of personal service that the local Wal-Mart was not equipped to do. And yeah, that Wal-Mart eventually drove them out of business. Customer good will is priceless and it must be earned. That is, if you care about returning customers. ---
**Author:** ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717/60 "2013-06-24T21:26:15Z")
> [@ombre12](#): > > Coconut rum and pineapple juice and ice. Going to buy that and see if she likes the mix. Hope so. In Belize (specifically, Caye Caulker), that’s referred to as a “Panty Rippa”. It’s about my favorite drink. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/return-to-a-liquor-store-because-you-cant-stand-the-taste/661717.md?page=4)