# Returning the boy to Cuba...anyone's thoughts on this **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [January 6, 2000, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244 "2000-01-06T21:12:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Christabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Christabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Christabel)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/1 "2000-01-06T21:12:00Z")
Forgive me if this doesn’t belong here. I’m new at this, and wasn’t sure if it shoud be here or in general questions. There is alot of contraversy going on with the decision to return the 6 year old boy back to Cuba. I’ve seen some of it on t.v. and read an article on it on MSNBC. I haven’t really followed the story like maybe I should have since it is apparently big news right now. So I was wondering what anyone’s opinion is on the subject if you have been following the story. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/2 "2000-01-06T21:17:00Z")
Well, politics aside…they knew full well who the father was…they really had no other choice. * * * If you can’t convince them, confuse them. Harry S. Truman ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/3 "2000-01-06T21:22:00Z")
I think he should go back. The mother wanted to leave Cuba; not the boy. Reports I’ve heard on NPR indicate the boy and the father love each other. Actually, this would be a non-issue were it not for the American Cuban community (IMO). It seems to me they’re still pissed of about what happened 40 years ago. Come on; there’s such a thing as carrying a grudge too far. If we REALLY wanted to get rid of Castro, we’d open up trade between the U.S. and Cuba. Have we ever gone to war with a country that has a McDonalds? Seriously, look at East Germany or the Soviet Union. A little freedom goes a long way. Right now Fidel has an enemy. If we become friends, he loses his Great Adversary and there is no reason to keep him in power. ---
**Author:** ![TubaDiva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tubadiva/32/507_2.png) [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/4 "2000-01-06T21:51:00Z")
Bottom line here: if we want other nations to respect our custody agreements, we have to respect theirs. The father was the custodial parent and the mother kidnapped the child out of the country. Yeah, it would be nice if everybody could come live here, but that child’s place is with his father. your humble TubaDiva ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/5 "2000-01-06T21:52:00Z")
This miserable saga is the consequence of a shameless pissing contest among chest-pounding politicians. If the boy’s father is peaceful and honest, then any decisions with respect to the boy ought to be his. The right decision was made by INS, not from principle, but because of sureptitious deals made by men behind the curtain. Whenever nation states interfere with the affairs of families, it is often the children who suffer. I’m reminded of a couple of things: (1) Phil’s statement about battles over piddly shit, (2) a blind pig finding the trough, and (3) political expedience drives the machine. * * * “It is lucky for rulers that men do not think.” — Adolf Hitler ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/6 "2000-01-06T21:54:00Z")
I tend to agree, after thinking it through. Just a sly observation…if _any_ thread deserved to be hijacked…! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/7 "2000-01-06T21:55:00Z")
It does seem to be a no-brainer for me, both as a parent and as an attorney. With the mother dead, the father is entitled to custody of the child unless he is proven to be unfit, which nobody asserts. The father wants to remain in Cuba, apparently, and wants his boy with him. Send the kid home! -Melin ---
**Author:** ![RonaldBarnhardt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bc79bd/32.png) [@RonaldBarnhardt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RonaldBarnhardt)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/8 "2000-01-06T22:04:00Z")
There are some who will say that the boy belongs with his loving father. Somehow, they believe that parental rights take priority over everything else. Then are are those waving their Cuban flags through the streets of Miami USA, that say that the father is a puppet of Castro, and is under the great despot’s command. Maybe if some the proud Cuban American flag wavers had the testicular fortitude to go fight for their own country with the same vigor that they display in the streets of Miami, both problems would be taken care of. ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/9 "2000-01-06T22:05:00Z")
If I hear one more goddamned Cuban American on the news acting as if he or she has any standing to even open his or her mouth on the topic (blood relatives and relatives by marriage notwith), I’m going to fly to Florida and smack them myself. I’m not sure why they think the decision is theirs to make; don’t they have something to do besides hang around Miami making nuisances of themselves? * * * “It’s my considered opinion you’re all a bunch of sissies!”–Paul’s Grandfather ---
**Author:** ![APB9999](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e8cbc/32.png) [@APB9999](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/APB9999)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/10 "2000-01-06T22:10:00Z")
What strikes me about all this is that I am yet to hear anyone mention how the kid feels. Does **he** want to return to his father? Has he said so? I suspect he has been asked. I would also suspect that he has said he wants to return to his father; is it not VERY suggestive of an agenda on the part of the media that no one has reported on this? Whichever way the boy’s feelings go, it is a central bit of news in this story. Either way, though, this is a tragedy. The boy may well never have a positive relationship with his father. Consider: His mother _died_ trying to get him to the U.S.; his father brought him back to Cuba. That may not mean much to a six year old, but it surely will as he grows up - in a poverty-wracked, totalitarian, isolated society which he will probably NEVER have the opportunity to leave again unless very drastic changes are in the offing. Right now I’m sure he feels the grief of his mother’s loss; as he grows up, he will struggle to give shape to his mother’s _sacrifice_. How would you feel? What would you tell yourself it was for? Even if he turns out a loyal Castro fan, he’s got to wonder what other paths he was denied. And his father will be at the center of it. On the other hand, the only alternative seems to be NO relationship with his father. There seems to be no good answer. ---
**Author:** ![Rabbi\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecc23a/32.png) [@Rabbi\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabbi_Sam)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/11 "2000-01-06T22:30:00Z")
As much as we would all like to see this small boy grow up in the free environs of America, he does have a living father, that by all reports loves him and is not in anyway abusive to him. Since the man has a wife it is obvious that the boy’s mother and father were divorced. By all legal rights in this country and in Cuba, the boy must be returned to his surviving parent, since that parent, by investigation, has not proven himself to be detrimental to the boy. There is no doubt that the anti-Castro Miami-Cuban connection and Castro himself are using this small boy and his father as a political banner. That is a sad fact of life in this case. It has been done before and will no doubt be done again. But political agenda’s aside; from a strictly humanitarian point of view, the boy should be returned to his awaiting father. Better still, the father should be allowed to come to America, with his wife and choose to either stay here with his son or return to Cuba. That to me would be the ultimate humanitarian effort. * * * shema yisrael adonai eloheynu adonai echad ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/12 "2000-01-06T22:33:00Z")
With respect to the last post, the wishes of the boy are irrelevant. If this was a nine-year-old American boy whose mother died taking him from New York to California, he would be returned to his father without much question. No one would bother to ask him, and if they did, it wouldn’t be very relevant to the legal issue (parental rights). Absent clear evidence the father is unfit, or that some other legal reason bars the return of the child, this isn’t even a debateable case. ---
**Author:** ![Crystalguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dbc845/32.png) [@Crystalguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crystalguy)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/13 "2000-01-06T22:36:00Z")
The child should have been returned as soon as he was dried off, given fresh clothing and allowed to recuperate from his ordeal. I think the “Cuban-American” community will seize any opportunity to engineer a confrontation with Castro. As if the regime prior to Castro’s had so much to recommend it. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/14 "2000-01-06T22:38:00Z")
Provided there’s no evidence of abuse, then of course the child should be returned to his father. And on a side note, the media should have the decency to leave this poor child ALONE!! ---
**Author:** ![Keeves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f05b48/32.png) [@Keeves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keeves)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/15 "2000-01-06T23:21:00Z")
I have been wondering all along if **perhaps** (a) the Cuban legal system had given sole custody to the mother, and (b) the media had chosen to avoid publicizing that fact. It would be the only reason I could think of for keeping hin the USA. But TubaDiva writes > [@](#): > > The father was the custodial parent and the mother kidnapped the child out of the country. Thank you for that info. Just wondering where you got it… ---
**Author:** ![JoeyBlades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a87d85/32.png) [@JoeyBlades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeyBlades)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/16 "2000-01-06T23:26:00Z")
It should not be the policy of the U.S. government to participate in the kidnapping of children from their parents. If the father were abusive or otherwise unfit, then maybe it would be a different matter. ---
**Author:** ![APB9999](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e8cbc/32.png) [@APB9999](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/APB9999)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/17 "2000-01-06T23:39:00Z")
DSYE, read my post again. I’m not suggesting the decision of whether he is returned or not be based solely on what the child wants. He is far too young to understand all the ramifications of either decision. But I want to KNOW how he feels about all this. I have no legal say in this matter; I’m merely deciding _how I feel about it_. And to claim that the boy’s feelings are irrelevant is incredibly callous. It may fly as a legal argument, but I am not making a legal argument. And I _do_ consider the boy’s feelings relevant, even if you do not. As it stands, I still think there is no good way out of this. Legally, the boy should very clearly be returned to his father. Far, far more importantly, I think that morally the boy should be returned his father as well. But it is short sighted to think that there’s an end to it, and every thing will therefore turn out swell; it will be surprising if this event doesn’t continue to cause emotional hardships for the child for many years to come. ---
**Author:** ![Krispy\_Original](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ec9cab/32.png) [@Krispy\_Original](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krispy_Original)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/18 "2000-01-07T00:02:00Z")
Geesh…all the kid has to do is become a decent pitcher and in about 12 years or so he can defect to the US the good old fashioned way… * * * Krispy Original – voted SDMB’s 19th most popular poster (1999) ---
**Author:** ![RobRoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7ba0ec/32.png) [@RobRoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobRoy)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/19 "2000-01-07T01:22:00Z")
Can you say P\_A\_W\_N ?? Actually the kid said a few days after he washed ashore - and his mother died, that he wanted a power-rangers suit and action figure, etc… Weird and depressing. No doubt his mom pumped him all up with news of lots o loot in miami to be had. Granted it sucks in Cuba now, and the kid is traumatized. I’m sure the family has totally poisoned him - at least it is a paternal relative and not the wife’s in Miami, otherwise it would be a global projection of a bad divorce. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244/20 "2000-01-07T09:50:00Z")
This topic has been fully discussed on talk radio througout the country. What parent would want to give up his child forever at a young tender age to the US. There is no question that we have freedom vis a vis Cuba but what guaranty is there that if the child remained here, he would benefits from all the positive things we have to offer. Cubans may not be as well off as we are and may have a screwed up political system, but I’ve met many a Cuban who was happy there. Comparing Cuba to Nazi Germany is like comparing Apple and hand grenades. The kid belongs to his father and not to the whims of others. Back to Cuba. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/returning-the-boy-to-cuba-anyones-thoughts-on-this/17244.md?page=2)