# Ribbed for MY pleasure -- A Spider's tale **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 6, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574 "2002-11-06T16:24:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![CRorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/1 "2002-11-06T16:24:48Z")
Last night I foud a spider. A nasty disgusting spider, but being the kind-happy go lucky person that I am, I struck up a conversation with the spider. “Hello Mr. Spider,” I said. “Don’t make me eat you tubby,” replied the spider. Now normally, I’d insults like this go unnoticed, but I had tried to be civil. So I took some toilet paper and wadded it up. Working deftly, to avoid making the spider suspicious I quickly blinded him with the toilet paper then compressed him–compressed him like a black hole compresses Rossane Barr–into the size of a garden pea. Now left with this goey nasty wad of tissue I flushed it and the spider. Flash forward 4 hrs. I’m brushing my teath for bed and realize the water in the toilet is kinda low. So I flush it figuring whatever the problem is, that will fix it. _No I haven’t been getting any sleep_ Yes, the spider had the last laught. That FUCKER blocked up my toilet! Tha Ass-Nazi! I try a few things, then give up it’s now 1 am and I embark on my quest for a plunger. On my rather … URGENT quest. After much searching I finally find a plunger. It’s a two piece dealie. The rubber thingie that screws into the handle. And unlike other plungers I’ve seen this one has an acrylic plastic handle. I guess for easier clean up. Because, unlike most plungers this one is RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE! Now I’m sure you’ve heard about the ER tale, about the man who was pleasuring himself with a plunger he had stuck to the bottom of the bath tub but he slipped and punctured a lung? Well this plunger is ideally made for that purpose. acrylic plastic for easy clean up after… activities. And the first 1/3rd of the stick thingy is a series of knobs, which are either to increase stimulation or give me a better grip. Well after using the plunger, those knobs ain’t helping my grip. WHY THE FUCK CAN"T YOU PEOPLE JUST BUY SEX TOYS! We don’t need a market niche for pseudo-sex toys–normal objects that can also be used for personal pleasure. I just want a fucking plunger that works! Not some sort of rectum pounding ribbed plastic piece of shite! Get off your asses and buy your own Benwah beads! Use the plungers for what they are intended for! ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/2 "2002-11-06T16:31:58Z")
I’ve never been a fan of stream-of-consiousness writing. ---
**Author:** ![ouisey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9fc29f/32.png) [@ouisey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouisey)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/3 "2002-11-06T16:35:10Z")
They actually make toilet plungers that are meant to be inserted rectally? Or perhaps, CRorex, you’re reading too much into those knobby bits on the stick. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/4 "2002-11-06T17:14:13Z")
Somtimes a cigar is just a cigar; and suggesting otherwise says more about the person than the object in question. ---
**Author:** ![Deadly\_Nightlight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Deadly\_Nightlight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deadly_Nightlight)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/5 "2002-11-06T17:18:41Z")
LOL then I am in trouble because when I saw our “ribbed for your pleasure” plunger I cracked up. I mean it really does look like something I have in my bottom drawer 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/6 "2002-11-06T17:25:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Deadly Nightlight \* > \*\*LOL then I am in trouble because when I saw our > “ribbed for your pleasure” plunger I cracked up. I mean it really does look like something I have in my bottom drawer 😉 \*\* If you have a yard long acrylic toy with a suction cup base in your bottom drawer, then: 1) you have an incredibly large, um, dresser, and 2) color me intrigued. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/7 "2002-11-06T17:29:37Z")
Is there a place for batteries in that plunger? ---
**Author:** ![Profane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@Profane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profane)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/8 "2002-11-06T17:31:07Z")
CRorex, I have the same one! We call it **The Porno Plunger** [sup]TM[/sup]. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/9 "2002-11-06T17:47:22Z")
So this is what… like a reversable coat? Do people pumpvac their entrails before ramming a pogo stick up their ass nowadays? Goody, I get to go revel in my normalcy. As a kid, I had one of those little guns that shot a “plunger like” suction dart out. Had I seen the cat squatting over that shaft like some Denise Austin workout video, surely I would have been scarred for life. Me fucking ow! ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/10 "2002-11-06T18:05:48Z")
Say, is [this](http://www.comforthouse.com/comfort/plunger.html) the plunger you’re talking about? ---
**Author:** ![Profane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@Profane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profane)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/11 "2002-11-06T18:07:12Z")
Nope, it cane from target. If you guys are really that curious, I can take a picture of it. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/12 "2002-11-06T18:07:59Z")
> [@](#): > > Me fucking ow! That’s what the spider said! ---
**Author:** ![Deadly\_Nightlight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Deadly\_Nightlight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deadly_Nightlight)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/13 "2002-11-06T18:33:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Waverly \* > \*\*If you have a yard long acrylic toy with a suction cup base in your bottom drawer, then: 1) you have an incredibly large, um, dresser, and 2) color me intrigued. \*\* Ok ok ok just the handle part:D ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2002, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/14 "2002-11-06T18:34:45Z")
Strap-ons are sooooo passee. ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/15 "2002-11-07T00:42:54Z")
It’s what you get for buying a plunger at “Sex Mart” ---
**Author:** ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/16 "2002-11-07T01:01:33Z")
See, I thought this was about you wearing your condoms inside out. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/17 "2002-11-07T01:06:18Z")
> [@](#): > > I just want a fucking plunger that works! Well, technically, that’s what you got, right? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/18 "2002-11-07T04:43:51Z")
How can we be this far into the thread without anyone making any obvious “plunger” jokes?!? I’ve come to expect more from you people, you know. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/19 "2002-11-07T14:33:59Z")
Allright, **featherlou**. Plunger? Why, I _roto rootered_ her. She got to know my pipe-snake real well if you now what I’m saying. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574/20 "2002-11-07T15:03:40Z")
SAY NO MORE! Ay! AYYYY! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ribbed-for-my-pleasure-a-spiders-tale/135574.md?page=2)