# Rich Little Ensuckens Dead Donkey Balls **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 22, 2007, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150 "2007-04-22T04:03:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![MN\_Maenad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e95f7d/32.png) [@MN\_Maenad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MN_Maenad)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/41 "2007-04-23T16:39:17Z")
[QUOTE=Terrifel] He should be probed by scientists. [/QUOTE] Heh heh. “Probed” OK, I’m done. While that was a soul-sucking intro, it reminds me of Gilbert Gottfried’s act at the roast for Hugh Hefner. (Wiki [link](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Aristocrats_(film)) if you don’t remember.) If a comedian can make people laugh within a week of 9/11, a good comedian should be able to do it after VT. Of course, that does nothing to associate Rich Little with the phrase “Good Comedian”, but if they would have had someone decent s/he could have worked with it. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/42 "2007-04-23T16:49:32Z")
According to [David Corn:](http://www.thenation.com/blogs/capitalgames?bid=3&pid=189161) > [@](#): > > This year the pre-event buzz was about Rich Little, the has-been (but still appearing 30 weeks a year in Vegas) comic impersonator. He had been selected as the evening’s funny-man–and widely perceived as a white-flag choice by the correspondents’ association. (Knowing a little about the internal process that led to the Little pick, I do not share that perception. Several edgier comics were approached first and said no.) Hmm. I wonder who? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/43 "2007-04-23T17:04:34Z")
[QUOTE=Kricket] How long ago did you see him? I saw him at a local club here six years ago or so and he was decently funny, but at the end actually snapped on someone for trying to get him to say dy-no-MITE! Started yelling about how rude she was to bring that up as he had grown up and was beyond that and she should respect that. Really sucked the fun out of the room. [/QUOTE] That proves how much he sucks. Dy-no-MITE must be thrown at him _every night_. You would think that in 20-30 years he would come up with at least one good comeback. _So the VA Tech shootings left Bush unable to bring teh funny, but all the soldiers dying in Iraq didn’t stop his “Gawrsh, where are those pesky WMDs?” act a few years ago. Gotcha._ One of those damned if you do damned if you don’t. If he tried to be funny as is traditional then there would be a pit thread about that. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/44 "2007-04-23T17:32:53Z")
> [@](#): > > I wonder who? Jimmy Walker for one. But negotiations broke down over the extra “dy-no-mite” fee. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/45 "2007-04-23T17:39:51Z")
[QUOTE=Loach] That proves how much he sucks. Dy-no-MITE must be thrown at him _every night_. You would think that in 20-30 years he would come up with at least one good comeback.\ [/QUOTE] I’m picturing him opening his jacket, with a whole bunch of explosives strapped to his chest. “I got your DY-NO-MITE right here, bitches!” and then cackling insanely. ETA: What about Jon Stewart? He could do his Dubya laugh - hehhehheh. That always slays me. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/46 "2007-04-23T17:44:30Z")
Oh, yeah, they’d hire Jon Stewart. Right about the same time Karl Rove staples his foreskin to his desk and pulls the desk out of his office. Would I pay to see either of those? Oh, hell, yes! ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/47 "2007-04-23T17:50:51Z")
I understand they started to go with a hip young black comic, but while Willie Tyler agreed to play nice, Lester wanted to make Katrina jokes. As for Little, I think you’re selling him short. Sure, in his safe little cocoon of a cable show Stephen Colbert is witty and hip, but think he could pull down a _Love Boat_ appearance and not lose ground to notorious scene stealer Lauren Tewes? Can Colbert pepper his repertoire with true and funny stories of sharing a dressing room with Wayland Flowers & Madame? Just how many “Truman Capote as Tiny Tim/Tricky Dick as Jacob Marley” hit Christmas Carol recordings has little Stevie made? And if you’ve ever heard Colbert sweat and mangle his way through a John Cameron Swayze Timex ad parody you’d appreciate just how not little Rich Little’s talents are. ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/48 "2007-04-23T17:54:29Z")
I’ve had the theme to Match Game in my head ever since I opened this thread. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/49 "2007-04-23T18:03:10Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] Hmm. I wonder who? [/QUOTE] Hard to guess. The set of all comics edgier than Rich Little contains all comics who aren’t Rich Little. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/50 "2007-04-23T18:09:50Z")
[QUOTE=Vinyl Turnip] Hard to guess. The set of all comics edgier than Rich Little contains all comics who aren’t Rich Little. [/QUOTE] oh come on now, you exaggerate - some comics are dead, ya know. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/51 "2007-04-23T18:23:48Z")
Back in the day- maybe '86- I was working as a stagehand for one of the Atlantic City casinos. One weekend Rich Little was the headliner. I remembered watching his schtick growing up, on such entertainment powerhouses of the day as _The Captain and Tenille_, _Dinah Shore_, and _The Muppet Show_, and thought- hey! Rich Little. I remember this guy! Man, he was the most personality-free guy I’ve ever met, before or since. We had a few dress and tech rehearsals before the weekend, then 4 or 5 shows over the weekend, and most of the time he wasn’t on stage I was no more than six feet from him backstage. He was duller than dull- no pleasantries, no conversation, no chit chat- either with me or anyone else around him. I don’t think it was nerves either, or that he was a prick- I’ve been around plenty of performers before and after their shows and none of them acted like this guy. It was suddenly clear why his whole act was comprised of impersonations of other people- because he had no personality of his own. He was just bland. The “jokes” he told while in character weren’t even all that funny; the audience laughed more out of recognition than humor. Kind of sad, really. I guess the only way you can guarantee not to offend anyone at a Correspondents Dinner is to not have any material more topical than 1990, if that. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/52 "2007-04-23T20:17:55Z")
[QUOTE=wring] oh come on now, you exaggerate - some comics are dead, ya know. [/QUOTE] Yeah, and what’s edgier than _that_? ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/53 "2007-04-23T20:41:04Z")
[QUOTE=wring] oh come on now, you exaggerate - some comics are dead, ya know. [/QUOTE] “Now presenting – Richard Pryor as channeled by John Edward!” Honestly, I’m surprised somebody hasn’t actually tried it. Though now that I think about it, that might be a funny gimmick for an act. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/54 "2007-04-23T20:43:41Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] “Now presenting – Richard Pryor as channeled by John Edward!” Honestly, I’m surprised somebody hasn’t actually tried it. Though now that I think about it, that might be a funny gimmick for an act. [/QUOTE] AND NOW: Lenny Bruce (as channeled by Whoopie Goldberg’s character in _Ghost_) ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/55 "2007-04-23T20:44:31Z")
I love how Bush begins with his “now serious folks… let’s give each other love” smarminess about how it’s essential and great that in a free society we can actually make fun of our leaders. Then he introduces Rich Little. Because at last year’s free society make fun of a leader dinner the mean old guest hurt his feewin’s. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/56 "2007-04-23T21:03:04Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] I’m picturing him opening his jacket, with a whole bunch of explosives strapped to his chest. “I got your DY-NO-MITE right here, bitches!” and then cackling insanely. [/QUOTE] Don’t give him ideas. In the post 9/11 climate . . . well, at least it would get his name in the headlines for the first time since _Good Times_ . . . ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/57 "2007-04-23T21:04:55Z")
[QUOTE=wring] oh come on now, you exaggerate - some comics are dead, ya know. [/QUOTE] And Rich Little ensuckens their balls! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/58 "2007-04-23T21:31:36Z")
In fairness to Rich Little (I wonder why he never went with “Dick?”) ensuckening _live_ donkey balls can be extremely perilous, as anyone who’s tried will affirm. ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/59 "2007-04-23T21:37:21Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] Hmm. I wonder who? [/QUOTE] Rip Taylor? ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2007, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150/60 "2007-04-23T22:33:40Z")
[QUOTE=spoke-] Rip Taylor? [/QUOTE] Too dangerous. If he tried his “bucketful-of-confetti” bit there, he’d be tackled by a dozen secret service agents and shipped off to Gitmo. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rich-little-ensuckens-dead-donkey-balls/401150.md?page=4)