# Ridiculous misinterpretations you've made **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2016, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746 "2016-12-28T00:28:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/41 "2016-12-29T08:24:08Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > When I was little I thought people lived in televisions and radios and that sex was illegal, so I’m actually kind of impressed by the maturity of your childhood delusions. Lol thanks…speaking of sex, I also thought that all it really took for a woman to become pregnant was for her and a man to sleep together in the same bed. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/42 "2016-12-29T08:26:49Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > It is and was done somewhat like that for a time, in other nations especially. > > My misinterpretation- I thought “coffee cake” was made with coffee and since I hated coffee during my early years I wouldn’t touch it. In my defense, there\* were \*some coffee cakes made during that time that did have coffee in them, perhaps i ate some when I was young and so… I didn’t know, until I just read this comment of yours, that coffee cake isn’t coffee-flavored. Ignorance fought! ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/43 "2016-12-29T15:53:51Z")
There’s a sign on my street about 10 feet before my house that says “hump ahead”. Indeed 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/44 "2016-12-29T16:00:57Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#): > > There’s a sign on my street about 10 feet before my house that says “hump ahead”. > > Indeed 😉 Or “Dip in Road”. Mmmm… Dip. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/45 "2016-12-29T18:06:37Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > Here’s another doubly relevant example. > > My sister made coffee cake that called for a cup of coffee; > > …so she opened the coffee can up, scooped out a cup and added it to her cake. :eek: > > Perfectly reasonable conclusion. :eek::eek::eek: Eccch! But it would keep you awake!:D:eek: ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/46 "2016-12-29T18:08:37Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Or “Dip in Road”. > > Mmmm… Dip. Or this meaning of “dip”. > **[D is for Dip](http://bsbackyard.blogspot.com/2010/10/d-is-for-dip.html)** > > "Dip" is a term of self deprecating affection in my family. I use the term in referring to myself when I commit some form of stupid error in... ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/47 "2016-12-29T18:09:54Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > I didn’t know, until I just read this comment of yours, that coffee cake isn’t coffee-flavored. > > Ignorance fought! You have made me feel sooooo much better!😃 ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/48 "2016-12-29T18:28:30Z")
At Christmas Eve dinner, my cousin, talking about another (not present) cousin: “Whatever you do, don’t ask him about his boxers.” \ "…I mean his DOGS! He was a couple of boxer dogs that he never shuts up about!’ ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/49 "2016-12-29T18:51:25Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > Lol thanks…speaking of sex, I also thought that all it really took for a woman to become pregnant was for her and a man to sleep together in the same bed. I grew up in a VERY Catholic household - my dad was in a Jesuit seminary for a bit until he decided he wasn’t meant to be a priest, and he left and joined the Marines… but I digress. When it came time for Mom to have _The Talk_ with me, it was primarily about how to deal with periods and how I shouldn’t be thinking about dating or boys till high school. Absolutely zero information on sex, and only being told that “babies are a gift from God.” Needless to say, I was very confused when I heard about unmarried girls getting pregnant. Why would God give a baby to someone who wasn’t married??? 😕 I was embarrassingly too old when I found out how it really works. But my daughter had the facts when she needed them, without the dancing around that my mom used with me. My daughter is now a middle school science teacher, and her last 2 weeks every school year are for 7th grade sex education. She’s a brave young woman. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/50 "2016-12-29T19:20:37Z")
“Beware of Balls”, located outside of either a driving range or a tennis court, I forget which, at Tama Hills in Japan. I figured it out after a moment, but on first glance I parsed it pretty much how anyone who knows me would expect me to. ---
**Author:** ![Carryon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc29f/32.png) [@Carryon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carryon)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/51 "2016-12-29T19:30:07Z")
> [@Patx2](#): > > So the other day I was skimming the news and I read, “man shoots guy with knife.” My first thought was how did he shoot someone with a knife? It took me a few minutes to realize, I am so tired he used a gun to shoot the guy with the knife. 🤔 I would say you were correct on that one, that sentence is horribly constructed. ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/52 "2016-12-29T19:39:49Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > a pile of them found here…quite funny > [http://www.alta.asn.au/events/altss\_w2003\_proc/altss/courses/somers/headlines.htm](http://www.alta.asn.au/events/altss_w2003_proc/altss/courses/somers/headlines.htm) These appear to be fairly old, but some are hysterical. My favorite might be “British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands”. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/53 "2016-12-29T19:39:57Z")
From another MPSIMS thread title: “How do Sihs wind their turbans?” This says more about me than the title, certainly, but I parsed it as “How do Sith wind their turbines?” So not only was it not what was actually written, but it didn’t even make any grammatical sense, which is why I re-read it. In my defense, the title seems to have a typo. ---
**Author:** ![purplehearingaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@purplehearingaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehearingaid)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/54 "2016-12-29T19:55:51Z")
When I was a little girl I heard a joke and told it to my dad ,he would dies laughing each time . " What did Popeye do when he burnt his thumb? He put it in Olive Oyl ! " I got the joke when I was older. LOL! The funny thing is that I am hard of hearing so I guess I must had read the person lips and they didn’t realize I was able to do this . ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/55 "2016-12-29T21:13:30Z")
[quote=“Carryon, post:51, topic:775746”] I would say you were correct on that one, that sentence is horribly constructed.[/QUOTE Yes, I agree. I find that happpens frequently with a headline. I saw something not too long ago that started off with, “the Queen’s death…” I thought Elizabeth II had died. The article was just about the taking over of the throne after the fact not the fact that she had indeed died. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/56 "2016-12-29T21:18:52Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > The signs on the side of the road that say, “Slow children at play” used to made me think they were warning drivers to be on the lookout for retarded kids. They have those signs all down the road where we go to the lake every summer. I always make the joke “If they’re ‘slow’, they really should have someone watching them, not just letting them run around in the street” Doesn’t help that the pictogram of a running child on the sign is wearing a winter hat and shorts. Slow indeed to dress that way. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/57 "2016-12-29T21:31:23Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > We had a similar one in the neighborhood where I grew up: “Slow Deaf Child”. Aww, poor kid. There was one in my grandparents old neighborhood, but it was less misinterpretable, more like a simple “DEAF CHILD IN AREA”. If that kid’s still around he/she must be in his 40’s by now. > [@Patx2](#): > > So the other day I was skimming the news and I read, “man shoots guy with knife.” My first thought was how did he shoot someone with a knife? Never heard of a ballistic knife? Ah, the things you learn reading Punisher comics! ---
**Author:** ![Haunted\_Pasta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/94ad74/32.png) [@Haunted\_Pasta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Haunted_Pasta)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/58 "2016-12-29T21:51:14Z")
On a recent trip to the grocery store I made a purchase, the packaging of which I momentarily mis-read and will now and forevermore deliberately misinterpret for the humor value: 8 WHITE HOT DOG BUNS Careful! Don’t touch them! ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/59 "2016-12-29T22:57:43Z")
Thread titled “The Ultimate Fate of Conic Sections”; every time I read it as “Comic Sections”. Of course I don’t know what Conic Sections are so my mind is just trying to make it make sense to me. But I want to be seated in the Comic Section. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2016, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746/60 "2016-12-29T23:05:16Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > When I was little I thought people lived in televisions and radios and that sex was illegal, so I’m actually kind of impressed by the maturity of your childhood delusions. Sex actually is a misdemeanor. De more I miss, de meaner I get. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ridiculous-misinterpretations-youve-made/775746.md?page=4)