"Rise of the Planet of the Apes" kicks ass (boxed spoilers)

Cafe Society
82

Since it is out on Pay-Per View and DVD, I will forgo the spoilers.

Ahem…

Have the producers, director, writers ever heard of science??? It goes into sci-fi stereotype BS right away.

Science guy’s father has terrible disease. Science guy works tirelessly to cure that disease.

Science guy gets remarkable results with ONE test subject and declares victory and wants to start with human trials.

That ONE test subject freaks out and based on that ONE example, the higher ups shelve the project.

Nobody watched that ONE test subject closely enough to notice that is was pregnant, and had in fact just given birth to live young. I guess checking the subject’s vital signs regulary during a drug trial was too much trouble.

Science guy gives experimental drug to father, who has remarkable results. He tells no one for 5 years, untl after ‘cure’ has started to fail. This causes him panic, as if alzheimer’s sufferers and their families wouldn’t give every dime they could beg, borrow or inheret for 5 more good years.

Later, they have another remarkable advance with ONE subject and want to make this the focus of all their efforts. ONE GODDAAMNED SUBJECT.

Ceasar is wearing pants throughout most of the film. Even after he in custody and placed in an animal shelter with other chimps. He is still wearing pants.
OK, I can go along with him being ‘house-broken’, but he is an animal in a single pair of pants for months on end in a room with no ‘toilet’ long after an intelligent creature would have realized that wearing pants was not nessasary.

Why did science guy not get concerned that chimp handler is sneezing blood after being exposed to experimental drug???

83

Also, 5 years pass and nobody has gained any weight or changed their hairstyle.

84

Loved the movie. This movie kept me thoroughly entertained from start to finish.

Also, this is the only movie I can think of, where I’m watching the ending credits and thought to myself: “Oh, shit!”

Nice touch I thought.

85

All your comments were spot-on except for this one.

I’ve had the same hairstyle for more than 5 years.

86

I saw this recently too and also thought it was dreadful. My complaints weren’t the plot-holes, pseudo-science or Davil Oyelowo’s accent (which is pretty much the same as mine, me being an Oxonian too), all of which fall under ‘suspension of disbelief’, but rather the shoddy script, bad acting and one-dimensional characterization.

I also saw it on a small screen and in many scenes the CGI was glaringly bad. Wonder if it’s a big screen/small screen thing?

87

This was a great flick - not a film. Keep in mind that, on paper, this franchise was so played out that it’s a miracle that this movie was not as shitty as a direct-to-DVD Tremors sequel. Instead, this was easily good enough to support an entirely new chapter in the franchise.

88

I bought this movie based on good reviews here and from people I know, and I have to say: what an utter load of crap.

Terrible writing, worse acting (James Franco has got to be the worst actor of his generation that is somehow making a living; I’d rather watch Keanu Reeves), and some of the most godawful plot holes I’ve seen in years.

A waste of 105 minutes if there ever was one.

Oh, and the “great CGI” I had heard about? Totally off base. Everything that was CGI looked like it was CGI, especially the baby Caesar.

Conquest of the Planet of the Apes looked better, had fewer plot holes, had much better acting, and had an actual reason for the apes to revolt.

The only thing that could have made this movie worse would have been for Tim Burton to have been the director.

89

But are you the same weight? If so, my hat is off to you Sir!

90

Just saw this on cable.

Meh…:rolleyes:
Awards for the ever present suspension of disbelief.

Spent Hour and a Half waiting for the movie to start doing something interesting.

When it does, the movie is over.

The CGI was good enough for maybe a video game or something.
The budgets for that stuff and time to get it right, makes it real noticeable when it falls short of spectacular.
They did get some emotion out of the apes to be more ape like, rather than looking too human.

The movie seemed like an extended trailer to what we really came to see.
Like an actual movie with a start and finish.

It was worth the 4 bucks I suppose.

91

Like the man said: “You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll kiss three bucks goodbye.”*

Only without the laughing or the crying. And it costs a buck more because of inflation.

*Bonus points if you know what that’s a quote from without googling!

92

Speaking as a New Zealander, it’s nice to see the Chocolate Chippie get some international exposure.

I enjoyed the film. It’s no more fictional in its portrayal of science than any other movie that has men in white coats or companies with “Gen” or “Dynamics” in their name. Most of the CG was excellent (in fact, every ape except for Caesar was outstandingly realised, especially the Orangutan) and I found the story compelling and easy to follow.

7 star-shaped windows out of 10.

93

Only got around to seeing this last night, but enjoyed it more than I thought I would (as I can still smell the stink of the Tim Burton one). Not sure I want a whole new trilogy though. Does a decent movie always have to be automatically followed by two sequels now?

Charlton Heston’s character might have been an astronaut, but he wasn’t exactly a rocket scientist. He didn’t notice it was Earth until seeing the Statue of Liberty, despite the Apes talking to him in English the entire movie.