# Roland Deschain - 167 posts in 11 days - What the Fuck ? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 26, 2004, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069 "2004-04-26T11:02:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/41 "2004-04-26T19:17:48Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > This guy having 15ppd isn’t really that bad if you think about it. I think handy held fast at around 12ppd for several years. I believe Guin and a few other posters are up around 16 or more if I’m not mistaken. Yes, but none of those veteran posters have/had a tpd (threads per day) ratio like RolandDeschain does. I expect “why is the sky blue” and “where do babies come from” to be the next subjects to arise. ---
**Author:** ![tremorviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47774/32.png) [@tremorviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tremorviolet)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/42 "2004-04-26T19:19:36Z")
> [@astro](#): > > I could be 180 degrees wrong, but my BSometer has started clanging with some of his posts re the [chemical castration bit and that his alienated wife won’t let him whack off](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=252738), and the [picture of a big guy with hand to hand combat training, somehow feeling the need to cart around a concealed weapon while shopping wth his wife at Walmart](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=252843) and everywhere else. > > I don’t what the end game is here. He asks some interesting questions, but I get the strong vibe that there’s something goofy going on with the near manic level of posts and the oddball personal items, that at times I think (for whatever reason) that we’re being played by him > . It’s amusing that his wife won’t have sex with him and then he posts that he has no clue that women don’t orgasm from penetration alone :rolleyes: No-freaking-wonder his wife won’t let him touch her. I wouldn’t either. The level of unsophistication of some of his quesitons make me wonder if he’s actually a bored and frustrated high school kid. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/43 "2004-04-26T19:42:07Z")
Hmmm, I haven’t even seen this guy once. ---
**Author:** ![UselessGit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/74df32/32.png) [@UselessGit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UselessGit)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/44 "2004-04-26T19:45:09Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > Well, as he notes in the chemical castration thread, he’s not getting any at home. So maybe he’s just sublimating. Doesn’t that make your palms go hairy? ---
**Author:** ![Opus1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/858c86/32.png) [@Opus1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opus1)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/45 "2004-04-26T20:04:47Z")
Geez, 40 posts in this thread and I’m the first one to notice the similarities between this guy and Wildest Bill? Has WB been forgotten so quickly? Both are generally conservative, but with some bizarre ideas well outside the conservative mainstream. Both have a handful of esoteric, obsessive topics they post on over and over again, and both post GQ’s with very long titles, often complete sentences. In addition, both seem to post off the top of their heads anything which strikes their fancy at the moment, including lots of things that could easily be answered with a simple Google search, and things which are fundamentally unanswerable. A comparison of obsessions: Roland Deschain: 1. Living on the high seas/ int’l waters questions: My wife and I want to become CRNA’s and move to Hawaii, and then live in a boat… What kind of boat would you get IF you wanted to explore the high seas? One last question tonight. If I had a “partyboat” in INTERNATIONAL waters just… Why if Napster illegal, but libraries legal? (includes discussion of hosting Napster in some bizarre, jurisdiction free place) 2. Sex questions: Do most women have O’s from penetration alone? Will the Doctor chemically castrate me to reduce/eliminate my sex drive? IF someone were to open a sperm bank where the “nurses” PARTICIPATED… Sex and my Theatre 100 class… 3. Bizarre attempts to avoid laws through technicalities Above party boat/ sperm bank threads How does requiring child support not violate the 13th Amendment’s prohibition against Where I live you can’t buy beer on Sunday…But what if I walked into the grocery… IF you were Kenneth Stilling or Kobe Bryant and wanted to escape prosecution… What if I didn’t stop when those Wall Mart anti-theft buzzers go off? What would happen if someone with diplomatic immunity did something really bad? IF I invented a “hovercraft” would I need a license to “hover” on the road? 4. Weightloss (already mentioned in this thread) Compare to WB: 1. Mosquitos Can you Really Blow Up A Mosquitoe by Pumping Your Arm? Do Mosquitoes Bite Fat People More Than Thin People? Would Are Eco Sytem be Ok If We Extincted Mosquitos? 2. Farts Is there a Way to Make Your Beans Fartless? If you Hold in a Fart, What Happens to IT? 3. Bizarre legal questions (which, like RD’s, seem to come a bit too much from personal experience/ desire) Can a Concrete Company Put a Lien on My Building if the Contractor Didn’t Pay Them? Can What You Say on Message Board be Held Against in Court? Is It Illegal To Sleep in Your Car? Could the Government Take Our Gun Rights Away? Would My Wife Get in Trouble for Doing This When I Die? 4. Unconventional weightloss schemes, just like RD: Washboard Stomach, A Six Pack…How can I get One FAST? Hey, What Do Ya’ll Know About DNP as a Fat Burner? Ok Is What I’m Taking Considered a Mexican Fat Burner? I’m not accusing RD of puppeting WB, just noting some bizarre similarities. Separated at birth, perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![Berkut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@Berkut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Berkut)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/46 "2004-04-26T20:49:26Z")
> [@UselessGit](#): > > Doesn’t that make your palms go hairy? Maybe he uses Nair for lube. ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/47 "2004-04-26T22:14:15Z")
> [@](#): > > he has a thread in ATMB (that started in GQ, natch) where Lynn “suggested” he post less and read more for a while. Well, to be perfectly fair, that was in the specific context of “making suggestions about improving the SDMB”… > **[Couldn't this improve "site speed" of Straight Dope exponentially?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=252642)** > > I propose a two tiered system. For an extra amount of money (say five dollars or so per year on top of your basic rate) you would get access to new “high speed” servers AND the right to edit your posts. The edit function could be stipped for abuse... …which he did a LOT of, when he first got here. But I notice that he’s knocked it off as per request. Ya know, I really dislike Pitting newbies for high post counts. Some folks just find exactly what they’re looking for here and they plunge in. So what? I haven’t noticed that any of his threads are particularly “inane”–I’ve **seen** “inane”. “Inane” is what makes you want to grab the poster’s scrawny neck and squeeeeeze. RD’s threads don’t seem to affect me that way. But YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/48 "2004-04-26T22:22:50Z")
> [@Opus1](#): > > Geez, 40 posts in this thread and I’m the first one to notice the similarities between this guy and Wildest Bill? Has WB been forgotten so quickly? Both are generally conservative, but with some bizarre ideas well outside the conservative mainstream. Both have a handful of esoteric, obsessive topics they post on over and over again, and both post GQ’s with very long titles, often complete sentences. In addition, both seem to post off the top of their heads anything which strikes their fancy at the moment, including lots of things that could easily be answered with a simple Google search, and things which are fundamentally unanswerable. > > A comparison of obsessions: > > Roland Deschain: > > 1. Living on the high seas/ int’l waters questions: > My wife and I want to become CRNA’s and move to Hawaii, and then live in a boat… > What kind of boat would you get IF you wanted to explore the high seas? > One last question tonight. If I had a “partyboat” in INTERNATIONAL waters just… > Why if Napster illegal, but libraries legal? (includes discussion of hosting Napster in some bizarre, jurisdiction free place) > > 2. Sex questions: > Do most women have O’s from penetration alone? > Will the Doctor chemically castrate me to reduce/eliminate my sex drive? > IF someone were to open a sperm bank where the “nurses” PARTICIPATED… > Sex and my Theatre 100 class… > > 3. Bizarre attempts to avoid laws through technicalities > Above party boat/ sperm bank threads > How does requiring child support not violate the 13th Amendment’s prohibition against > Where I live you can’t buy beer on Sunday…But what if I walked into the grocery… > IF you were Kenneth Stilling or Kobe Bryant and wanted to escape prosecution… > What if I didn’t stop when those Wall Mart anti-theft buzzers go off? > What would happen if someone with diplomatic immunity did something really bad? > IF I invented a “hovercraft” would I need a license to “hover” on the road? > > 4. Weightloss (already mentioned in this thread) > > Compare to WB: > > 1. Mosquitos > Can you Really Blow Up A Mosquitoe by Pumping Your Arm? > Do Mosquitoes Bite Fat People More Than Thin People? > Would Are Eco Sytem be Ok If We Extincted Mosquitos? > > 2. Farts > Is there a Way to Make Your Beans Fartless? > If you Hold in a Fart, What Happens to IT? > > 3. Bizarre legal questions (which, like RD’s, seem to come a bit too much from personal experience/ desire) > Can a Concrete Company Put a Lien on My Building if the Contractor Didn’t Pay Them? > Can What You Say on Message Board be Held Against in Court? > Is It Illegal To Sleep in Your Car? > Could the Government Take Our Gun Rights Away? > Would My Wife Get in Trouble for Doing This When I Die? > > 4. Unconventional weightloss schemes, just like RD: > Washboard Stomach, A Six Pack…How can I get One FAST? > Hey, What Do Ya’ll Know About DNP as a Fat Burner? > Ok Is What I’m Taking Considered a Mexican Fat Burner? > > I’m not accusing RD of puppeting WB, just noting some bizarre similarities. Separated at birth, perhaps? Does he say somthing similar to “gotcha ya”? ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/49 "2004-04-26T22:36:39Z")
> [@Achilles](#): > > I get the feeling that there’s either a revelation or a disappearance _just_ around the corner. I had that exact same feeling. Lots of newbie posts is to be expected, and forgiven. His however, stand out. His title usually start out with “what if”, they’re long as hell, he types replies in the title bar, and he’ll reply to several of his own threads in a row, thus putting them right next to each other which magnifies the percieved post tally. I think really, that these little things do much more to make him seem annoying than his actual ppd ratio or post count. I was wondering when this situation would make it into the Pit, it sure didn’t take long. ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/50 "2004-04-26T22:57:10Z")
I just want to know where he got that COOL user name. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/51 "2004-04-27T01:00:38Z")
> [@rolandgunslinger](#): > > I just want to know where he got that COOL user name. 😃 Tsk, tsk. You should know by now that the coolest user names go with the dorkiest people, while the dorkiest user names go with the coolest people. Why, I am a prime example of that very principle! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/52 "2004-04-27T01:13:48Z")
> [@Qadgop the Mercotan](#): > > Tsk, tsk. You should know by now that the coolest user names go with the dorkiest people, while the dorkiest user names go with the coolest people. Why, I am a prime example of that very principle! Which side of that would you happen to reside on? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/53 "2004-04-27T01:30:32Z")
> [@Garfield226](#): > > Which side of that would you happen to reside on? 😛 Really! No need for me to belabor the obvious now, is there? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Measure\_for\_Measure](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/measure_for_measure/32/557_2.png) [@Measure\_for\_Measure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Measure_for_Measure)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/54 "2004-04-27T01:56:17Z")
To answer the OP: Roland posted 2 separate topics in [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=252723). When this was pointed out, he apologized, " Sorry, I meant for these to be seperate posts,…these are questions that I’ve pondered in some cases for years in private with no outlet for discussion and sometimes I get a little excited." I’m willing to forgive the fellow, but I might respectfully ask that he limit himself to starting one thread every 2 days. Greater focus would vanquish ignorance more effectively. (OBTW: Does Roland Deschain know about this pit-thread?) ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/55 "2004-04-27T01:59:13Z")
> [@Qadgop the Mercotan](#): > > Tsk, tsk. You should know by now that the coolest user names go with the dorkiest people, while the dorkiest user names go with the coolest people. Why, I am a prime example of that very principle! > > 😃 So…your saying I’m **COOL** Or…I’m a **DORK** Now I’m just confused. Damn You Roland Deschain! ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/56 "2004-04-27T02:25:38Z")
It’s Zen. You know what Roland thinks of Zen. Besides, Roland is of the line of the Eld. That’s Arthur Eld, descended from Eldarion of the House of Telcontar, and of the line of Luthien. ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/57 "2004-04-27T03:22:33Z")
> [@Qadgop the Mercotan](#): > > It’s Zen. You know what Roland thinks of Zen. > > Besides, Roland is of the line of the Eld. That’s Arthur Eld, descended from Eldarion of the House of Telcontar, and of the line of Luthien. Just leave my family outta this…MISTER! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Achilles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dc4da7/32.png) [@Achilles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achilles)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/58 "2004-04-27T07:54:52Z")
> [@Measure for Measure](#): > > (OBTW: Does Roland Deschain know about this pit-thread?) I’m pretty sure that if he knew about it he’d be in here posting 'til his wheels came off. So, I’n guessing that, no he doesn’t. [weird thought] There should be some sort of “slap-in-the-head” smiley, that you sould IM to another poster. It would reach from the monitor and bitch-slap them, saying “Oi, there’s a pit-thread about you going on, right now ! Git in there and defend yourself boy !” OTOH, it would most likely be abused. 🙂 [/weird thought] ---
**Author:** ![Kymodoce](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8797f3/32.png) [@Kymodoce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kymodoce)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/59 "2004-04-27T09:52:44Z")
Am I the only person who thinks Mr Deschain is actually a creation of a college sociology or psychology class? I can see them all sitting round saying “OK, let’s make him say THIS now, and see what the masses reply!” My favourite was the concealed weapon in WalMart… until I remembered a friend works there… ---
**Author:** ![Roland\_Deschain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@Roland\_Deschain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Deschain)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069/60 "2004-04-27T10:06:16Z")
A few points in reply: 1. I only post things that I sincerely find to be interesting. It’s almost ironic to me that a similar situation (people questioning my sincerity) caused me to post personal infomation years ago at www.nationalmortgagenews (during a debate on credit scoring and other related topics). My marriage still hasn’t recovered from the damage from that incident. The darn thing is that people in school since my earliest years have accused me of the same thing in real life (Roland why do you ask so many stupid questions?, ect. ect. blah, blah). I find it interesting that people always question my sincerity, rather than my sanity. Personally, I think that I am normal and everyone else is nuts (then again lots of crazy people probably think the same thing). 2. I’ve never heard about this posting in the “title line” being an issue until I came to this forum. I have participated at [www.allnurses.com](http://www.allnurses.com) for the last several years as Roland. My wife asked me to not participate there so much because she considers it only a matter of time until I say something to get us both kicked out of the nursing profession (actually she would prefer I not waste my time on these boards at all. Then again she says she is leaving my butt no matter what in 15 years so I’m not real inclined to give up one of the few things in this world that brings me some small degree of satisfaction). In any case, I will cease doing this since it seems to be a serious issue for some. Usually, in real life I make it a point to ignore social mores that I find not to be logical (damm the consequences as Shakespeare’s Hamlet said “to thine own self be true”). The wife is convinced that I suffer from something called Asperger’s syndrome frankly I don’t know much about the condition except that it seems to involve behavior she believes that I exhibit. 3. I generally study from around 11:00 PM Eastern Standard time until around 6:00 AM when I finally go to bed (the wife gets up around 6:15 AM). Generally, I take a break every twenty minutes or so to post, or read posts that I find fascinating. As I indicated above these posts are subjects that I have ruminated about in many cases for years (and posed to my wife and anyone else who will listen many times). 4. Since I have been participating in these types of boards (maybe five years or so) I have only posted on about five boards. In fact, although I have read Cecil’s books since highschool (at least I think I did, did he have books way back in 1987 it’s been so long I can’t be certain) and visited the straightdope website for about two years (but those few times I attempted to access the message boards, I was not able to do so). However, my point is during that entire time, I have never personally denigrated anyone. The worst thing that I have said about someone was that their **ideas** were intellectually bankrupt on a specific subject, or that they were engaging in ad hominem attacks (or violating Kant’s conversational implicature). Honestly, I think it represents a streak of real viciousness in society that this sort of personal denigration seems to be commonplace not just here but in many venues. However, with that said I would willingly give up my life to secure your right to engage in such behavior. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roland-deschain-167-posts-in-11-days-what-the-fuck/242069.md?page=4)