# Romance Movies That Feature Actual Stalking **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 6, 2014, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932 "2014-08-06T09:48:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/1 "2014-08-06T09:48:52Z")
It’s become received wisdom that many movies, often romantic comedies, frequently feature behaviour towards an object of affection from an often male protagonist which is depicted as romantic and charming proof of devotion, but that would in real life count as stalking, and be, if not downright illegal, subject to pretty severe condemnation. That said, what are some actual examples from movies of stalking or other inappropriately obsessive behaviour that is depicted as romantic? In _Wall-E_, the titular garbage robot is infatuated with EVE, the female researcher who is aloof to the point of hostility. But when she goes into hibernation mode, he uses the opportunity of having her comatose and unresisting to dress her up and take her on a “date”. Yeah, try that in real life with an unconscious girl some time. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/2 "2014-08-06T10:01:31Z")
The first two things that happen in _Fifty Shades of Grey_: 1. Ana covers for her friend who is too ill to interview a CEO. 2. The CEO “coincidentally” shows up at Ana’s workplace while she’s at the counter and buys a DIY Kidnapping Kit. And it gets worse. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/3 "2014-08-06T12:23:24Z")
I’ve always thought that the song “On the Street Where You Live” from _My Fair Lady_ could have a stalkerish vibe to a modern audience. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/4 "2014-08-06T12:34:10Z")
Twilight. X-Men. I’ll Love You Forever (children’s book, but still…) ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/5 "2014-08-06T15:58:30Z")
Well, ALL the men in \*\*\*There’s Something About Mary \*\*\*engage in stalkerish behavior, just to be around Cameron Diaz. Meg Ryan is definitely stalking Tom Hanks in _ **Sleepless in Seattle** _… but because it’s Meg Ryan, we’re supposed to find that adorable rather than creepy. ---
**Author:** ![SaharaTea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SaharaTea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaharaTea)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/6 "2014-08-06T16:05:11Z")
**Bed of Roses** - Christian Slater becomes obsessed with a woman he’s never met; starts watching her through her window and sending her hundreds of bouquets of flowers from a “secret admirer.” **High Fidelity** - A jealous John Cusack stalks his ex-girlfriend and her new man by showing up outside their apartment and making countless phone calls. **Say Anything** - A lot of people consider John Cusack’s holding a boombox outside Ione Skye’s house to be romantic as hell, but technically it’s stalking. **Phantom of the Opera** - pretty self-explanatory. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/7 "2014-08-06T16:25:08Z")
> [@SaharaTea](#): > > **Say Anything** - A lot of people consider John Cusack’s holding a boombox outside Ione Skye’s house to be romantic as hell, but technically it’s stalking. That’s a pretty loose definition of stalking. Anyone who goes to someone else’s house once is stalking? He’s not peering in windows, not monitoring her whereabouts, not making unwelcome advances, and not repeating a pattern of harassment. I think the bar needs to be a bit higher before you can call it “technically” stalking. ---
**Author:** ![Evin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@Evin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evin)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/8 "2014-08-06T16:33:32Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Meg Ryan is definitely stalking Tom Hanks in _ **Sleepless in Seattle** _… but because it’s Meg Ryan, we’re supposed to find that adorable rather than creepy. Doesn’t Tom return the favor in _ **You’ve Got Mail** _? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/9 "2014-08-06T16:42:20Z")
The hero in Bedazzled (both versions). Uses multiple wishes from The Devil in order to ingratiate himself into his love’s life, rather than just, you know, talking to her. Aladdin. Uses multiple wishes to pass himself off as a prince so that he can get the girl. Beauty & The Beast. Kidnaps Belle’s father to force her to live with him. ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/10 "2014-08-06T16:47:07Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Meg Ryan is definitely stalking Tom Hanks in _ **Sleepless in Seattle** _… but because it’s Meg Ryan, we’re supposed to find that adorable rather than creepy. In **Addicted to Love** , she stalks her ex, who is dating the ex of Matthew Broderick, who is also stalking the couple. Naturally, the stalkers end up falling in love with each other. ---
**Author:** ![Emiliana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@Emiliana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emiliana)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/11 "2014-08-06T16:48:13Z")
Runaway Bunny. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/12 "2014-08-06T17:02:25Z")
_Big Fish_. Ewen McGregor’s character, Edward, seems his dream girl, Alison Lohman, at a circus. He works for the ringmaster, and only works for information about her. He eventually determines her name, and where she goes to college. He shows up at her door unannounced, introduces himself, and asks her out. She reveals that she’s engaged. He leaves, but says that he loves her and he _will_ marry her. He shows up outside her window one day, with hundreds of her favorite flowers, saying he called every florist in (I think) 3 counties to get them all. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/13 "2014-08-06T17:08:49Z")
Stakeout - Coupla cops have to observe a woman. Guess what… one falls in love with her! Another Stakeout ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/14 "2014-08-06T17:09:07Z")
Groundhog Day - but he didn’t have much choice. ---
**Author:** ![Push\_You\_Down](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/push_you_down/32/9095_2.png) [@Push\_You\_Down](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Push_You_Down)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/15 "2014-08-06T17:18:09Z")
> [@SaharaTea](#): > > **Say Anything** - A lot of people consider John Cusack’s holding a boombox outside Ione Skye’s house to be romantic as hell, but technically it’s stalking. The first time I saw this scene brought up in relation to “stalking” I thought “yep, that word has lost nearly all meaning.” Same thing is happening to “bullying.” ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/16 "2014-08-06T17:21:39Z")
LA Law: IIRC, Harry Hamlin pesters Susan Dey after she repeatedly turns him down, uses a professional meeting as a pretext to meet and size up her fiancé, and interrupts their wedding in a gorilla suit. Also IIRC, since it was the mid-80’s, even the gorilla suit had accentuated shoulder pads. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/17 "2014-08-06T17:41:04Z")
> [@SaharaTea](#): > > **Say Anything** - A lot of people consider John Cusack’s holding a boombox outside Ione Skye’s house to be romantic as hell, but technically it’s stalking. So is Romeo stalking Juliet? In the play Cyrano de Bergerac, is Christian stalking Roxane? ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/18 "2014-08-06T17:49:17Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Beauty & The Beast. Kidnaps Belle’s father to force her to live with him. I think that’s more in the realm of kidnap/rape rather than stalking. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/19 "2014-08-06T18:45:06Z")
[Stalking Is Love.](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/StalkingIsLove) ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2014, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932/20 "2014-08-06T19:01:01Z")
> [@MovieMogul](#): > > In **Addicted to Love** , she stalks her ex, who is dating the ex of Matthew Broderick, who is also stalking the couple. Naturally, the stalkers end up falling in love with each other. I thought about this as a nominee, but rejected it because the OP stated that the stalkerish behavior should be depicted as romantic. Niether Broderick’s nor Ryan’s character’s stalking of their exes is depicted as romantic … they are both depicted as obsessive losers who were ruining their lives with all the stalking. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/romance-movies-that-feature-actual-stalking/694932.md?page=2)