# Roosters; feathered assholes! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 8, 2014, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982 "2014-05-08T16:15:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/41 "2014-05-10T05:14:38Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > They give some people _trophies_ for being first. ☹ I think you mean _coming_ first. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/42 "2014-05-10T05:29:33Z")
[Sylvester] Hello, breakfast.[/Sylvester] ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/43 "2014-05-10T05:31:24Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Thirded. > > Stew the arrogant fuck and them shit him out. It’s a fucken _bantam_. About as much meat as a quail, and not worth the plucking IMHO. My first foray into chook-keeping (30 years ago) found us with 8 lovely Australorp hens, and a most handsome rooster of the same breed. Brian was a wonderful bloke, nice and tame and all, but he too had a propensity to crow on the rail outside our bedroom window…from app 4.00am onwards, regardless of the time of year. Next door lived a couple of elderly spinster sisters who had a flock of their own…reigned over by a bantam rooster, very pretty but as mean as all get-out. Make eye contact and he’d fly at you with spurs outstretched…nasty little fucker he was! And not content with the aggravated rape of all his own harem, he decided that Brian’s ladies were his for the fucking as well. Poor Brian (despite being double the size of his nemesis) was no match for this evil firebrand…and he ended up at the bottom of the garden, scratching out a living celibate and miserable. Roosters? Fuck 'em. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c57346/32.png) [@Little\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Pig)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/44 "2014-05-10T07:23:14Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Thirded. > > Stew the arrogant fuck and them shit him out. I believe the original dish for Coq au Vin., given the length of cooking, is for rooster, not hen. Let me check Julia… Anyone? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/45 "2014-05-10T12:43:26Z")
_Coq au Vin_ (Quick Recipe) 1. Kill and discard _le coq_. 2. Enjoy _du vin_. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/46 "2014-05-10T15:10:57Z")
_Zoot alors! Vinny le Peu avec le mot_ “coq”! _Tres ordinaire, mais non_? ---
**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2014, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/47 "2014-05-15T02:25:03Z")
I hate to GQ a fine pitting, but > [@MacTech](#): > > I just purchased my own set of five for tick control Woah. I have ticks dropping off trees all over my property and usually onto me. Tell me about the chickens controlling ticks. ---
**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2014, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/48 "2014-05-15T02:26:42Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > _Coq au Vin_ (Quick Recipe) > > 1. Kill and discard _le coq_. > > 2. Enjoy _du vin_. I recall a similar recipe for Bourbon Chicken. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2014, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/49 "2014-05-15T03:30:07Z")
There is no such thing as a bad rooster. Only a misunderstood rooster. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2014, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/50 "2014-05-15T03:57:08Z")
Way bad in the day when I lived on acreage, we had chickens. The coyotes would get a few every year, and we’d feed the ones who had fallen off laying to the dogs, so every spring we’d buy sex links at the local feed store. One year, whoever was supposed to make sure all the chicks were female made a mistake, which we discovered when he made his first juvenile, cracked, crow. We had to put up with it for a bit, as he was still too young to tell apart from the girls. I figured it out the day that he attacked me as I was feeding, and I punted him out of the pen for coyote snacks. Little bastard got back in somehow - he couldn’t fly so that wasn’t it. We had to listen to him crow for weeks, first because we couldn’t tell which one was him, then because we couldn’t catch the sonovabitch. Occasionally he’d attack and I’d be able to punt him out, but he always got back in; finally one day my foot got him in the head and stunned him enough that I could run out and grab him. Dog food at last! ---
**Author:** ![buckgully](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb9ed0/32.png) [@buckgully](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buckgully)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2014, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/51 "2014-05-16T02:37:21Z")
“Mrs Tweedey, the chickens are revolting!” “Finally we agree on something.” ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2014, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/52 "2014-05-16T04:03:08Z")
There was a story on the news tonight about a man who took a baseball bat to his neighbour’s rooster because the bird started crowing at 3:30 in the morning. So, MacTech, you aren’t by chance, posting from a jail cell are you? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/53 "2014-05-19T16:22:59Z")
Nope, but here’s the latest Poultry Update; We’re adopting six of my sister’s chickens to help with tick control, as my chickens aren’t old enough to live outside yet, they’ll be added to the existing flock when ready Unfortunately, one of the six is the Feathered Asshole, mainly to get him away from the kids visiting the barn. He will be on parole up here, the FIRST time he makes any agressive move towards any of us, it will be his last. He will become dinner and feathers for fishing flies… ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/54 "2014-05-19T17:31:08Z")
I seem to recall that a fully roostered rooster, as compared to a capon, made for rather poor eating. It has been a while, yes… ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/55 "2014-05-19T18:50:00Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > I seem to recall that a fully roostered rooster, as compared to a capon, made for rather poor eating. Not to a coyote. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/56 "2014-05-19T19:06:22Z")
Chickens. Dumbest birds in the world. When I was a teen, we had 6 hens and 2 roosters. We’d get 5 eggs every day. Then one of them flipped out and would screech, panic and flop around destroying eggs whenever someone walked in the coop. I got so freaking tired of it that, one day, I walked in with my .22. SREECHRAAWFLOPCRASH_ **BAM** _. We still got 5 eggs a day from the remaining 5 hens. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/57 "2014-05-19T20:25:04Z")
You’d think they’d catch on, don’t you? “Let’s see, now, Esther pecked at the Food Kid, and she’s gone. April pecked the Food Kid, and she’s gone. Henrietta, same thing. Starting to see a pattern here…oh, look! A bug!..” ---
**Author:** ![rsat3acr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a3d4f5/32.png) [@rsat3acr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rsat3acr)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/58 "2014-05-19T21:27:01Z")
ever thought of choking the chicken? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/59 "2014-05-19T21:30:51Z")
Not when I was five, no. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982/60 "2014-05-19T23:55:26Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > I seem to recall that a fully roostered rooster, as compared to a capon, made for rather poor eating. It has been a while, yes… I don’t know if it is just Barred Rocks, but none of them made good eating at all. Maybe if we had tried when they were young, but as adults they were pretty stringy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/roosters-feathered-assholes/687982.md?page=4)