# Rose thorn rant (somewhat pathetic) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 23, 2007, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880 "2007-07-23T19:57:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ticker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@ticker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ticker)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/1 "2007-07-23T19:57:46Z")
Ok rose, I know you want thorns for personal protection, but does a thorn in my thumb have to hurt _quite that much?_ It’s not big, it’s not clever, and I chopped you down and burned you up just the same - ha ha ha 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/2 "2007-07-23T20:20:05Z")
[QUOTE=ticker] Ok rose, I know you want thorns for personal protection, but does a thorn in my thumb have to hurt _quite that much?_ It’s not big, it’s not clever, and I chopped you down and burned you up just the same - ha ha ha 😛 [/QUOTE] _Turn and run! Nothing can stop them, Around every river and canal their power is growing. Stamp them out! We must destroy them, They infiltrate each city with their thick dark warning odour._ Oh wait, I was thinking of [something else.](http://www.health.state.ny.us/environmental/outdoors/hogweed/giant_hogweed.htm) ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/3 "2007-07-23T20:26:22Z")
“A rose by any other name would still make your thumb hurt like a motherfuck.” -Shakespeare ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/4 "2007-07-23T20:28:09Z")
Every rose has its thorn. And every night has its dawn. And every cowboy sings a sad sad song. Stupid fucking cowboys. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/5 "2007-07-23T20:28:46Z")
[QUOTE=ticker] Ok rose, I know you want thorns for personal protection .. [/QUOTE] Did you know that you are 22 times more likely to prick the person who waters and prunes you than you are to prick a grazing animal? ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/6 "2007-07-23T21:28:31Z")
It’s not big, it’s not clever, but it seems to have outwitted you. Thorns: slightly smarter than ticker. ---
**Author:** ![kurilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ea5d25/32.png) [@kurilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kurilla)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/7 "2007-07-23T22:04:39Z")
And here I opened this thread hoping for a Golden Age/Silver Age [comic heroine](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rose_and_Thorn) pitting. ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2007, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/8 "2007-07-23T22:07:25Z")
Years ago I lived in Mexico for two months. Every morning there was this rooster that woke me up at 3. In the end, I ate him for dinner. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/9 "2007-07-24T16:08:20Z")
I would have thought breakfast. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2007, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/10 "2007-07-24T16:39:20Z")
[QUOTE=ticker] Ok rose, I know you want thorns for personal protection, but does a thorn in my thumb have to hurt _quite that much?_ It’s not big, it’s not clever, and I chopped you down and burned you up just the same - ha ha ha 😛 [/QUOTE] Eh…sounds like the rose was only trying to defend itself. Seems like you did more damage to it than it did to you. Sailboat ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2007, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/11 "2007-07-24T16:59:01Z")
Would that my prick had such sting. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2007, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/12 "2007-07-24T17:00:13Z")
[QUOTE=ticker] … I chopped you down and burned you up … [/QUOTE] That’ll learn it. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2007, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/13 "2007-07-24T17:13:32Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] Would that my prick had such sting. [/QUOTE] Sufficient to cause women joy in chopping it off and burning it? ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/14 "2007-07-25T15:12:38Z")
[QUOTE=Waverly] It’s not big, it’s not clever, but it seems to have outwitted you. Thorns: slightly smarter than ticker. [/QUOTE] That’s the thing that gets me. I water and prune the roses to make them happy, but they still prick me. It’s like an abusive relationship. Maybe we should form a support group. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/15 "2007-07-25T16:08:10Z")
[QUOTE=SiXSwordS] Did you know that you are 22 times more likely to prick the person who waters and prunes you than you are to prick a grazing animal? [/QUOTE] I don’t know what you’re driving at, but a rose has a god-given right to keep and bear thorns for personal protection. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/16 "2007-07-25T16:31:13Z")
Flowers are weak creatures. They are naïve. They reassure themselves as best they can. They believe that their thorns are terrible weapons. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/17 "2007-07-25T16:34:52Z")
But the rose’s (Mendelian) right has to be balanced with **ticker** ’s right to bare arms. At the very least, roses should be compelled to use child safety corks and be subject to a seed check. ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/18 "2007-07-25T16:54:22Z")
[QUOTE=SiXSwordS] But the rose’s (Mendelian) right has to be balanced with **ticker** ’s right to bare arms. At the very least, roses should be compelled to use child safety corks and be subject to a seed check. [/QUOTE] That’s fine for the pansies that live in their well-tended gardens, and never consider anyone else’s experience. But a rose that lives way at the back of the lawn, where the woods encroach, is going to have a different opinion. ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2007, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rose-thorn-rant-somewhat-pathetic/412880/19 "2007-07-25T17:51:19Z")
I think the general tone of this thread is best suited for MPSIMS.