# Royal Flush
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630
**Category:** Factual Questions
**Created:** [August 25, 2012, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630 "2012-08-25T18:49:45Z")
**Posts on this page:** 17
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/21 "2012-08-26T01:24:30Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> OK, now I don’t even want to know what Teddy Roosevelt used.
A big stick.
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/22 "2012-08-26T16:08:29Z")
I should have anticipated that one…
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### Author:  [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/23 "2012-08-26T16:22:31Z")
I was going to say a log.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/24 "2012-08-26T16:32:42Z")
> [@davidm](#):
>
> I was going to say a log.
That would be Lincoln.
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### Author:  [@D18](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D18)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/25 "2012-08-26T16:33:44Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> OK, now I don’t even want to know what Teddy Roosevelt used.
Cub’s pelts. Duh.
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### Author:  [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/26 "2012-08-26T17:00:30Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#):
>
> Thank you!
> One down and one to go-What about that Presidential asswipe, folks?
_Please!_ The Queen of England does not defecate, urinate, or flatulate! (As with all women)
Pres. Obama (and most all other politicians) use a lot! (Corncobs?) Because they’re all full of %\*.
Thank you for coming.
I’ll be here all week…
😃
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### Author:  [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/27 "2012-08-26T17:46:56Z")
> [@D18](#):
>
> Cub’s pelts. Duh.
He’s TR. He uses LIVE cubs. While staring at their mother and DARING her to start something.
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### Author:  [@Szlater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Szlater)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/28 "2012-08-26T18:04:44Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#):
>
> And the brand’s own [website](http://www.andrex.co.uk/aboutus/aboutus.aspx) says, “The Queen granted us a Royal Warrant in 1978 as a mark of recognition that Andrex® is a regular supplier of toilet tissue to the Royal households.”
Just because they supply toilet paper to the royal households (and have warrants) doesn’t necessarily mean that the Queen or other Royals use that brand. Products could be used solely by the staff in their quarters and in the public toilets.
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### Author:  [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)
#### Post date: [August 26, 2012, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/29 "2012-08-26T23:38:25Z")
And I would imagine that whatever the Prez states he wants brand-wise, that is what is supplied to any toilet he would possibly use. If he has a preference. [most people are relatively opinionated on their bog paper]
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### Author:  [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)
#### Post date: [August 27, 2012, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/30 "2012-08-27T00:02:34Z")
> [@Szlater](#):
>
> > [@Dewey\_Finn](#):
> >
> > And the brand’s own [website](http://www.andrex.co.uk/aboutus/aboutus.aspx) says, “The Queen granted us a Royal Warrant in 1978 as a mark of recognition that Andrex® is a regular supplier of toilet tissue to the Royal households.”
>
> Just because they supply toilet paper to the royal households (and have warrants) doesn’t necessarily mean that the Queen or other Royals use that brand. Products could be used solely by the staff in their quarters and in the public toilets.
Of course. But unless you’re planning to sneak your way into her private rooms to determine for yourself, it’‘s the closest we’'re going to get.
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### Author:  [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)
#### Post date: [August 27, 2012, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/31 "2012-08-27T01:07:02Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#):
>
> [Goose neck?](http://www.kirjasto.sci.fi/rabela.htm)
Exactly what I first thought. **njtt** , what’s this about an ad suggesting retrievers?!?
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### Author:  [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)
#### Post date: [August 27, 2012, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/32 "2012-08-27T01:14:10Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#):
>
> [Goose neck?](http://www.kirjasto.sci.fi/rabela.htm)
For Queen Bess, beaver.
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### Author:  [@sqweels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sqweels)
#### Post date: [August 27, 2012, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/33 "2012-08-27T01:16:46Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#):
>
> This morning, I started laughing when I saw a photo of Queen Elizabeth with the caption “60 years on the throne”.
Now that’s what I call a “royal wee”.
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### Author:  [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)
#### Post date: [August 27, 2012, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/34 "2012-08-27T01:23:17Z")
> [@Leo\_Bloom](#):
>
> Exactly what I first thought. **njtt** , what’s this about an ad suggesting retrievers?!?
For decades, Andrex toilet paper had been advertised in the UK by ads featuring [yellow Labrador](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yellow_Labrador) puppies. The puppies are also featured on the packaging. I first heard the idea that the intended implication was that using Andrex is like wiping your bottom with a puppy expressed by Adrian Edmonson’s character on [The Young Ones](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Young_Ones_%28TV_series%29). He had a point.
[Andrex puppies](https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=andrex+puppies&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=oy9&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=Rcw6UNmwF6mi0QWx74HQDA&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAQ&biw=1218&bih=889).
It is made very explicit [here](http://www.ocado.com/webshop/product/Andrex-Puppies-on-a-Roll-Toilet-Tissue/25189011).
But, as I said, the Queen prefers corgis to Labradors.
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### Author:  [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)
#### Post date: [August 28, 2012, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/35 "2012-08-28T11:24:26Z")
After recent [events](http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-19364261) I suspect there may be a few copies of _The Sun_ torn into squares and hanging on a nail in the royal privy.
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [August 28, 2012, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/36 "2012-08-28T11:31:08Z")
I sent an email to the White House yesterday asking about the First Family’s choice in toilet paper.
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [August 28, 2012, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/royal-flush/632630/37 "2012-08-28T11:47:12Z")
Wouldn’t this choice be left to the [Groom of the Stool?](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Groom_of_the_Stool).
(and he’d better choose well, or else he’ll be demoted to something presumably worse than Groom of the Stool.)
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