# Rude questions **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 14, 2005, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430 "2005-03-14T06:38:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/41 "2005-03-15T16:33:48Z")
My boyfriend’s uncle, loudly, at Christmas dinner, asked me how my grades are. He followed it with: “Do you get straight As?” To me, that’s about as rude as asking how much money I make. I was too dumbfounded to answer, thankfully my boyfriend took over the conversation. ---
**Author:** ![Podkayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/42 "2005-03-15T17:21:48Z")
What did you get on your SATs / ACTs? Ugh! During freshman orientation I got stuck in a looonnngg cafeteria line with this guy who was bragging, in excruciating detail, about his test scores. Then he asked me what I got, and I told him that I didn’t really think test scores were that important. He gave me a smug, knowing look, and kept after me, and I told him that I didn’t really remember what they were. This was a lie, and he didn’t really buy it, but it did shut him up. Then, when we returned to our orientation session, he asked me to check my registration packet, which had, among other things, my SAT and ACT scores. I gave him an icy, “I don’t think so.” Then, can you believe it, when my back was turned, he helped himself and took a look! I might have been really pissed if I didn’t have his SAT score beaten by 100 points, and at least two points better on the ACT. ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/43 "2005-03-15T18:15:39Z")
I’m often asked if my hair is naturally curly, which isn’t really a rude question and I don’t mind at all. What is rude, is how most people react; saying they hate me, or how I must wish I had straight hair instead, or they give me a look that says they think I’m lying and don’t want to admit to perming my hair. Bite me. I’m going to use \*\*Anaamika’s \*\* answer for the why aren’t you married? thing. The truth would be that there’s a hideously bad, tiny dating pool around here. You just know that if I said that the questioner would have a single brother or son I’d be inadvertantly insulting. Yep, soon as Cletus is paroled, it’s hitched-ville for me! ---
**Author:** ![meanoldman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@meanoldman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meanoldman)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/44 "2005-03-15T19:14:55Z")
Just last night I was in an ER, having taken my elderly mother there because she needed an x-ray to see if she broke anything when she fell (cracked a wrist). But the waiting room was uncomfortably close to the check-in desk. Every time someone checked in, you knew what they were there for. One woman gets tirage’d and sent back to the waiting room for awhile. Another woman in the waiting room, waiting for someone else entirely, calls out to the woman " So, honey, is the baby ok or did you have a miscarriage?" :eek: :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Mint\_Julep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc79bd/32.png) [@Mint\_Julep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mint_Julep)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/45 "2005-03-15T19:20:24Z")
Not a question but I get this all the time: “Gosh, your hair has gotten long.” (insert sound of crickets chirping) What am I supposed to say: “Well I warned it last week that it had better stop that pesky _growing_ that it has been doing”? I am a girl who likes my hair long, it is not tropical Barbie length long or Crystal Gayle long by any means. I just never know, “thanks”?..I mean they did not really give me a compliment. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/46 "2005-03-15T19:47:57Z")
> [@Ashes](#): > > I’m often asked if my hair is naturally curly, which isn’t really a rude question and I don’t mind at all. What is rude, is how most people react; saying they hate me, or how I must wish I had straight hair instead, or they give me a look that says they think I’m lying and don’t want to admit to perming my hair. Bite me. I get this too (though I think yours is curlier than mine) but it reminds me of a similar question. When I was in high school, I had really short hair, and it recently went curly. Basically I was a white girl with an afro. I went to a school that was predominantly black, and I got constantly asked if I was half black. That in itself isn’t offensive, but damn, it bugged the shit out of me. Because what does it really matter? AND WHITE PEOPLE HAVE CURLY HAIR, TOO. Hello Gabe Kaplan. ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/47 "2005-03-15T19:52:52Z")
> [@Miss Violaceous](#): > > The big one for me is “How old are you?” But, it’s a product of my circumstances. I look younger than I am, and I started school earlier than most. Between the two, I have people questioning my age and judging me for it on a regular basis. Me too! Except now that I’m almost 60 its more amusing than annoying. I’ve even had co-workers ask to see my driver’s licence! ---
**Author:** ![kimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f0a364/32.png) [@kimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kimera)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/48 "2005-03-15T20:05:09Z")
> [@Ashes](#): > > I’m often asked if my hair is naturally curly, which isn’t really a rude question and I don’t mind at all. My friend was the same way. She had natural very curly hair that was in the most beautiful shade of red. People didn’t believe her either. I have a lot of hair and at least once a week I get asked if it’s all real/mine. This doesn’t bother me at all, it’s when they refuse to believe my answer that I get pissed. Why would you ask a question if you are so sure of the answer that you refuse to believe it when the askee answers otherwise? ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/49 "2005-03-15T20:18:33Z")
> [@The Weird One](#): > > I was talking on the phone for the first time with someone I’d met online, and he asked me what size bra I wear! _Excuse me???_ So I asked him how big his penis is. Suffice to say we did not date. Was the bra size wrong or the penis size wrong? Or is that too personal a question? 😉 The only personal question that I get from strangers is “Where are you from?” after hearing my foreign accent. But that doesn’t wsorry me, even thoiugh a full answer is quite long … ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Violaceous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Miss\_Violaceous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Violaceous)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/50 "2005-03-15T20:41:54Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > So . . . what did you go to the doctor for? “For about an hour and a half! Don’t you hate how long doctors keep you waiting these days?” ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2005, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/51 "2005-03-15T22:03:54Z")
I think it’s rude when people ask hair-related questions such as these: “Is that a wig?” “Are you a real redhead?” “Do you have a perm, or is your hair naturally curly?” I have long, thick, wavy red hair. I don’t mind discussing my hair with people I know, but when total strangers in a grocery store come up and ask questions like these, I am mildly annoyed. For the record, it’s not a wig, and both the color and the curl came from my mother’s side of the family. But, IMHO, none of these things are any of your business unless I know you, at least in a casual way. ---
**Author:** ![Corii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Corii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corii)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/52 "2005-03-16T00:21:52Z")
> [@Mint Julep](#): > > Not a question but I get this all the time: > > “Gosh, your hair has gotten long.” response: Yeah, it does that. People are goofy. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/53 "2005-03-16T01:06:37Z")
> [@Wile E](#): > > Nowadays, I sometimes get asked if I am a hobbit. I just reply that I am. It’s just easier that way. You could answer this: “Yes I am! Want to see the hair on my toes?” and act like you were about to take off your shoes and socks. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Millit\_the\_Frail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Millit\_the\_Frail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Millit_the_Frail)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/54 "2005-03-16T08:06:48Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > I think it’s rude when people ask hair-related questions such as these: > > “Is that a wig?” > > “Are you a real redhead?” > > “Do you have a perm, or is your hair naturally curly?” **Pinkfreud,** I came here to post, “Is that your real hair color?” Sheesh. I’m usually up front about the topic, even making jokes about my “fake blonde hair”–I’ve had it for a third of my life, and prior to that, my hair was “real blonde,” and I’m over it. I have no problem talking about it, but when people ask, I just feel like they’re overstepping their bounds. You had better wait until I’ve broken the proverbial ice over my hair color! The other, that a surprising number of people are asking: “How much are you spending on your wedding?” :mad: Really. If he or she is the kind of person who is obviously going to have (or has already had) a more “money” wedding than I will, I can never resist the urge to come back with the snide, “The wedding’s just one day, you know. We’re saving our _real_ money for the marriage.” I’m a very calm, pacifistic person, until someone looks down the nose at me… ---
**Author:** ![Aangelica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b2d939/32.png) [@Aangelica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aangelica)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/55 "2005-03-16T16:27:20Z")
I have a license to practice law. However, I don’t actually do so. Therefore, my favorite rude question is “Why don’t you practice law for a living?” Faugh. No matter what I say, people seem to inevitably assume it’s either because I’m incompetant (I’m not), or unable to find a job in the field (I wasn’t). Nobody seems to believe I was more than willing to take a pass on 80 - 100 hour weeks, no personal life, high stress, and all the other assorted unpleasant realities of being a practicing attorney. ---
**Author:** ![trupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@trupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/trupa)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2005, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/56 "2005-03-16T21:08:11Z")
it just boggles my mind that people would actually ask some of the questions in this thread… Mrs. Trupa, ([bragging mode] who is an attending Radiation Oncologist, Fellow of the Royal Canadian College, etc. thankyouverymuch [/bragging mode]) has been questionned as to being old enough to drive a car alone, and has been assumed to be a medical student, nurse, technician, patient relative, and secretary… The “there-there-little-missy-don’t-you-worry your-pretty-little-head-none” snide, patronizing, condescending attitude of the car salesman to whom we had concealed her “secret identity” drove me to new heights of hostility and aggravation. She just enjoyed pulling the wool over his eyes… ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/57 "2005-03-17T01:32:57Z")
> [@Millit the Frail](#): > > **Pinkfreud,** I came here to post, “Is that your real hair color?” Yes, it is, but this is not my real head. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/58 "2005-03-17T01:37:08Z")
> [@pinkfreud](#): > > “Do you have a perm, or is your hair naturally curly?” I should point out, I don’t mind this question - probably because my hair really is naturally curly. It’s still a rude question, though. ---
**Author:** ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/59 "2005-03-17T01:43:02Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I should point out, I don’t mind this question - probably because my hair really is naturally curly. > > It’s still a rude question, though. My hair is naturally curly, too. Nevertheless, it’s a rather personal kind of question to be coming from a stranger. Not as bad as one that my best friend used to get occasionally: “Are your boobs real?” Can you believe that a woman would ask another woman (a total stranger) that question? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2005, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430/60 "2005-03-17T02:21:31Z")
The question which probably doesn’t quite count as rude which I get tired of answering is “Where are you from?” I don’t mind telling people that I’m not from here, but I’m never sure what the appropriate answer to where I’m from is. (Note: this is a purely geographical question- I’m not of any interesting ethnicity.) As it happens, I’ve moved from state to state an average of every two and a half years for more than the last decade. I don’t mind telling people that I was born in Minnesota, or where my parents live now, or where I went to college, but I don’t always feel like giving enough of my life story that people don’t give me that “Minnesota, that’s mighty far away. How’d you get here from there?” "Well, my dad got a job transfer and then . . . . " [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-questions/294430.md?page=4)