# Rude spouse **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 3, 2016, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434 "2016-06-03T23:03:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/21 "2016-06-04T14:03:28Z")
I’ve a feeling this is going to boil down to “He should have known it was painful for me to make gravy.” You didn’t ask him to make dinner for the family … you told him in minute detail how and what to do, not just what to prepare but exacting details of how to prepare it. He actually obeyed you in every way, unquestioning. I once had a wife that pulled this kind of crap on me … I stared her in the eye for a few seconds and gave the kids Purina Cat Chow … told them to go hungry if they didn’t like it. That’s being rude … ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/22 "2016-06-04T14:06:04Z")
> [@user1963](#): > > Do you think this is inconsiderate and rude? He was eating fries with cheese and gravy on them with his fingers? I don’t know about inconsiderate and rude, but it’s sure as hell messy! ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/23 "2016-06-04T17:11:29Z")
I would say that couples of interest can and should work out their own ground rules for what constitute appropriate consideration for each othe’s sensitivitiesr, and not be bound by anybody else’s opinion on the matter. (Why does spell-check underline "else’s and “other’s”?) ---
**Author:** ![Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emtar_KronJonDerSohn)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/24 "2016-06-04T17:24:25Z")
It’s a good thing you didn’t ask for help. Melodrama and passive aggressive martyrdom are such effective communication tools that I don’t know why we still bother with spoken language. I mean HSSSSSSSSSS ow ow ow ow OKAY, I’LL JUST SOLVE ALL YOUR PROBLEMS HERE ALL BY MYSELF, PLEASE DON’T GET UP ow ow hssss ow ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/25 "2016-06-04T17:33:25Z")
Now I’m hungry for poutine. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/26 "2016-06-04T17:43:46Z")
The key to any good marriage is shoving resentment way, way down deep. All the way down to where the microwaved burgers and gravy meet their final resting place. ---
**Author:** ![UberArchetype](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/2bfe46/32.png) [@UberArchetype](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UberArchetype)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/27 "2016-06-04T18:03:44Z")
I just want to shovel my food in peace. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/28 "2016-06-04T18:19:36Z")
Matilda read her book silently in the corner as Harry and Zinnia Wormwood sloppily engulfed the food on their plates. It was mostly yellow and brown, with steam rising from it, and some parts stuck out with jagged edges. On one side of each plate was something with a bread bun on top that might once have been some kind of sandwich that had been microwaved for far too long. Its contents oozed out of one side, as if ridding itself of its contents might allow it to heal… but the grubby short-fingered paws of the Wormwoods never ever gave it the chance. Matilda concentrated very hard and tried to imagine a place from her book that was clean and nice, a place where she could have tea with Miss Honey. She wasn’t sure what kind of a place it would be, but there wouldn’t be a TV with the WWE blaring in the background. There might not be TVs at all there… but if there were, she was sure that they wouldn’t be covered with dried food splatter from prior meals. No, she decided most firmly: No TVs… ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/29 "2016-06-04T22:12:51Z")
What kind of cheese was it? ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2016, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/30 "2016-06-04T23:32:31Z")
Why? ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/31 "2016-06-05T03:40:13Z")
For his next burger and fries with shredded cheese and gravy, you should probably just express your concerns in point form on post-it notes all around his plate. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/32 "2016-06-05T03:47:40Z")
Does the gravy go on the burger or the fries? ---
**Author:** ![Fiveroptic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fiveroptic/32/8257_2.png) [@Fiveroptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveroptic)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/33 "2016-06-05T03:59:24Z")
Back in the eighties KFC had what I thought were delicious fries with chicken gravy, especially because it was free if you worked there (I was in high school.) I haven’t thought about that in decades. I wonder if I’d still love KFC fries and gravy. No way I’m brave enough to try it now. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/34 "2016-06-05T04:51:14Z")
> [@spamforbrains](#): > > If someone serves your kids fries and burger, shouldn’t you be more concerned about the lack of anything vegetable-like rather than dumping gravy and cheese on their fries? At least the family had a serving of word salad with their meal. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/35 "2016-06-05T18:02:46Z")
So, whatever happened to the OP? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/36 "2016-06-05T18:15:24Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > Does the gravy go on the burger or the fries? . . . or served as a beverage in a mug. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2016, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/37 "2016-06-05T21:27:22Z")
> [@bob\_2](#): > > Sounds like a typical American family dinner to me 🙂 Nah, cheese and gravy on the fries IDs it as our friends to the North. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/38 "2016-06-06T03:26:55Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > So, whatever happened to the OP? Yes, the thread was going so well for her. Kind of shocking that she never returned. ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/39 "2016-06-06T04:01:29Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Whether its rude or not (I really can’t follow the story–I’m in the who gives a shit how you eat in private camp), there’s more than just burgers and fries going on here. Agreed. If you are that pissed off over how he cooked dinner and what he did/did not do, then there are deeper issues that you need to deal with. Don’t just add this to the top of “things I will bring up during every argument” list. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2016, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434/40 "2016-06-06T06:02:02Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > (I really can’t follow the story… Yeah, I can’t either. If HE did fries, why was OP making gravy and shredding cheese? And where did the burgers come from? If, in fact, he didn’t make dinner as promised, then this goes way beyond rude and into selfishness and disrespect at personality disorder levels. Also, don’t enable him. He agreed to make dinner, so you lie down and say lied down until he does, or he doesn’t eat. If the kids whine at you for dinner, tell them that dad’s making it tonight and they should go whine at him. (Or if they’re old enough, you can tell them they have the option of making it themselves, too.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rude-spouse/756434.md?page=3)