# Ruin-a-Series! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 13, 2006, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615 "2006-06-13T21:40:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/21 "2006-06-14T12:51:14Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > I win the Thread, I’m a thinkin’. I think that only happens if you say something funny. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/22 "2006-06-14T13:14:20Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > I think that only happens if you say something funny. I don’t notice anything comparable to a barrel of monkeys in _your_ post, you champion of unemployed Elvis Inpersonators everywhere, you. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/23 "2006-06-14T13:18:02Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > I don’t notice anything comparable to a barrel of monkeys in _your_ post, you champion of unemployed Elvis Inpersonators everywhere, you. :dubious: 😕 You also didn’t see me bragging about how funny I was. Seriously, I mean, do you think anyone even cracked a smile at that? Incidentally, you’re not quite as good at insults as you are at making jokes. Maybe best not embarrass yourself by attempting more of them. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/24 "2006-06-14T13:30:17Z")
Actually, the last half of that was a mistake I made in cut & paste. ---
**Author:** ![Push\_You\_Down](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/push_you_down/32/9095_2.png) [@Push\_You\_Down](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Push_You_Down)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/25 "2006-06-14T14:29:58Z")
Okay boys saddle up and ride on… But yeah the Sailor Moon joke wasn’t that funny. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/26 "2006-06-14T15:55:31Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Robert Jordan’s _Wheel of Time_ series, actually. [_snerk!_](http://archive.gamespy.com/comics/nodwick/ffn/ffn.htm) ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/27 "2006-06-14T17:38:47Z")
If you have a problem with another poster, **Excalibre** , take it to the Pit. Cafe Society is meant for discussion about the arts, so calling out another poster–no matter how unfunny you might think he is–needs to be left out of the discussion. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Means\_Go](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cc9497/32.png) [@Green\_Means\_Go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Means_Go)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/28 "2006-06-14T17:52:36Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > First, create a really interesting, original fantasy world. Give it a huge history with catastrophes and Great Evils and ancient lost technologies and magics and prophecies. Drib and drab the background and secrets out over the course of things so they stay interesting and curious, and addict your readers to finding out what’s going to happen. So far, so good. > > Then drag out the plot over the course of 12 or more gigundous volumes, making sure nothing really happens except excessive description of clothing, hair, mannerisms and weaponry. And on top of that, develop an often-terminal, extremely rare illness, making the certainty of your actually finishing said series very uncertain. > > Oh, wait…that’s already happened! Sorry, wrong thread… [Slight Hijack] This HAS to be a description of Robert Jordon. He’s sick? I agree with everything you wrote, but if he doesn’t finish this series, I am seriously going to go downtown and start lighting things on fire… [/Slight Hijack] ---
**Author:** ![kushiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbce88/32.png) [@kushiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kushiel)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/29 "2006-06-14T17:54:44Z")
> [@Raguleader](#): > > Harm and Mac discover that they are long-lost twins on the final episode of JAG. _cry_ So many seasons, so many hints…like X-Files for military TV fans. Oh, and thank Og this has already been debunked, but Uwe Boll directing the Metal Gear Solid movie. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Means\_Go](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cc9497/32.png) [@Green\_Means\_Go](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Means_Go)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/30 "2006-06-14T17:55:24Z")
Had I scrolled down I would have seen you confirmed it was Jordon. Still… he’s sick??? ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/31 "2006-06-14T18:56:12Z")
Lost: Reveal everything or reveal the whole thing takes place on Fantasy Island or Gilligan’s Island. Or PANORAMIC VIEW OF LOST ISLAND, SLOWLY PULL CAMERA BACK. A STRANGE GLASS WALL IS SLOWLY REVEALED. THE GLASS WALL IS SPHERICAL. WAIT! IT’S A SNOW GLOBE! THE SNOW GLOBE IS SITTING ON HURLEY’S TABLE. HE’S OBVIOUSLY CATATONIC. THE END. 24: Jack Bauer runs out of time. Produce a sequel (After-M_A_S_H_, Archie Bunker’s Place, Golden Palace) Inuyasha: Damn it! That Kikio treats me like a dog! I love you Kagome! ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/32 "2006-06-14T19:04:56Z")
> [@labtrash](#): > > cast Ted McGinley in your TV show. Please explain. I don’t watch all that much TV, mind you, so I’m not familiar with much the guy has done. I do know that it wasn’t _him_ that ruined _The West Wing_. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/33 "2006-06-14T19:05:18Z")
> [@Speaker for the Dead](#): > > Imagine the Foundation trilogy, if you will–the first three books, which are the only ones I’ve read at this point. In filming it, they’d cut out any mention of the history of the Mayors, the Merchant Princes, and the rest. Instead, they’d skip straight to the plot of Foundation and Empire, but contrive it so that it immediately follows the death of Hari Seldon. No, that’d be too good. How about they make him survive as a lecherous-but-oh-so-funny old-man-hologram, who accompanies the hero and his love interest (“wife” is too boring–they’d barely know each other, and so a romance could develop over the course of the story) throughout the movie? > > Any mention of Seldon’s Plan, of course, would be out–on one hand, it would make those who believe in free will uncomfortable, while simultaneously alienating those religious people who believe that meddling with fate is only to be done by God–and probably replaced with a flawed machine that could fail in the end, allowing everyone to go home happy. Free-willers would think “see? You can’t predict the future!” while the religous folks could say “see? God’s will is the only way.” Everyone’s happy! Except, that is, people who have read the books. > > Oh, and of course the actual books are far too dull, action-wise, for movie audiences, so there would be a lot of fight-scenes added in. The defeat of [the Bad Guy whom I won’t mention] will be altered to include explosions, sweat, tearing of clothing, and a protracted emotion struggle where the hero (the fight must include the protagonist) realises that he’s related to [Bad Guy] and thus cannot kill him casually. [Hollywood Producer] Perfect! Only get rid of that old man. We’ll keep the name to make the fans happy, only we’ll make him a smart good-looking and hip rebel that the kids will love, played by, oh, I dunno, how about Will Smith? And forget that founding a new planet at the edge of the galaxy crap. Too long, too boring. We’ll just set it up as a rebels-vs-empire thing. The emperor will be played by Christopher Lee and there’ll be a big kung-fu showdown between them at the end of the movie, and in the end Hari Seldon (played by Will Smith) will win and re-establish the Trantorian Republic and will be declared the new president by acclamation. And get the girl. The End. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/34 "2006-06-14T19:16:03Z")
> [@YaWanna](#): > > Please explain. I don’t watch all that much TV, mind you, so I’m not familiar with much the guy has done. I do know that it wasn’t _him_ that ruined _The West Wing_. Ted McGinley is the patron saint of shark-jumping. Happy Days, Love Boat, Married With Children, etc.etc.etc… > [@Green\_Means\_Go](#): > > Had I scrolled down I would have seen you confirmed it was Jordon. Still… he’s sick??? [Announcement here](http://www.tor.com/jordan/) ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/35 "2006-06-14T19:24:49Z")
Easiest way to ruin a Series: have the ball go between Buckner’s legs. Ruined the Series for everyone in New England. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/36 "2006-06-14T19:51:30Z")
Remake Shakespeare in Love. With Rosie O’Donnell as Viola and George Kennedy as Will. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/37 "2006-06-14T20:56:42Z")
Here’s an update on Jordan’s [blog](http://www.dragonmount.com/RobertJordan/) ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/38 "2006-06-14T21:02:07Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Ted McGinley is the patron saint of shark-jumping. Happy Days, Love Boat, Married With Children, etc.etc.etc… He doesn’t actually ruin the series, though. He’s invariably brought in after the series has been ruined, to oversee its demise. ---
**Author:** ![Boulter\_s\_Canary](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Boulter\_s\_Canary](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boulter_s_Canary)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/39 "2006-06-14T22:50:40Z")
Film any of Patrick O’Brian’s Aubrey/Maturin books: Director - James Cameron Jack Aubrey - Robin Williams Stepehen Maturin - Jim Carrey ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2006, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615/40 "2006-06-14T22:54:34Z")
> [@Tengu](#): > > He doesn’t actually ruin the series, though. He’s invariably brought in after the series has been ruined, to oversee its demise. Then I would say “generally” is an better term than “invariably,” as _TWW_ was quite good for a while after McGinley’s recurrent role (I’m thinking it was about Season 5 or 6 that was the “demise” period). Just sayin’. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ruin-a-series/360615.md?page=3)