# Sad day- irishfella's father has died. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 17, 2012, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158 "2012-02-17T17:14:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/1 "2012-02-17T17:14:14Z")
We’re grieving the sudden loss of a wonderful man. My beloved father-in-law died yesterday in a car accident. He leaves behind his wife of almost 40 years, 3 children and 7 grandchildren. He was a man of strong faith, quiet and gentle, and always there with a word of encouragement or a smile if you needed it. He will be deeply, deeply missed, not only by his family and friends, but by his colleagues in academia, where he was well known for his work in the field of the psychology of conflict. I’m really not sure why I’m posting this here, but if every loss diminishes us all, then we have all surely been diminished by his passing. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/2 "2012-02-17T17:20:44Z")
I am so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/3 "2012-02-17T17:26:26Z")
I am so sorry. And I can relate. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![nonacetone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nonacetone/32/2819_2.png) [@nonacetone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nonacetone)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/4 "2012-02-17T18:12:39Z")
I’m sorry for your loss. I send you my condolences. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/5 "2012-02-17T20:44:39Z")
I am sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts go out to you and your family during this painful time. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/6 "2012-02-17T21:14:47Z")
So sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/7 "2012-02-17T23:02:27Z")
I’m sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/8 "2012-02-17T23:17:10Z")
That us terribly sad. I’m do very sorry and I, too, send my deepest condolences to all of his loved ones. May he rest in peace. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/9 "2012-02-18T00:14:27Z")
Can you recount his work in the field of the psychology of conflict? That sounds interesting. And I send my thoughts and condolences to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![PapSett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@PapSett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PapSett)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/10 "2012-02-18T00:17:55Z")
I am so very sorry to hear this. Sincere condolences to the family. He sounds like a fine gentleman. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/11 "2012-02-18T01:18:59Z")
I’m so sorry to hear this. My condolences to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/12 "2012-02-18T02:30:12Z")
It’s such a gift that you live in a relationship where your inlaws are a positive loving force in your life. Sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/13 "2012-02-18T02:58:22Z")
I’m sorry for your loss. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/14 "2012-02-18T03:11:56Z")
**irishgirl** , irishfella, his mom, you and the whole family are in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![MoodIndigo1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@MoodIndigo1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoodIndigo1)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/15 "2012-02-18T03:52:37Z")
I’m sorry for your loss, **irishgirl** and irishfellow. It’s so very sad. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/16 "2012-02-18T03:52:52Z")
My condolences, **irishgirl**. > [@irishgirl](#): > > I’m really not sure why I’m posting this here, but if every loss diminishes us all, then we have all surely been diminished by his passing. It helps to talk..and share. We’re all here to listen. -D/a ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 10:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/17 "2012-02-18T10:14:58Z")
Thanks for all your kind words. He studied the effects of conflict on how people deal with problems, how conflict can become “normalised” and the barriers to reconciliation, using Northern Ireland as his field of study. He was a recognised authority in that field, and spoke at conflict resolution and reconciliation summits and conferences in places like Colombia, Israel, South Africa, Sri Lanka and the Balkans. I know very little of the specifics of his work, but I know that he was always happy to travel anywhere he was asked to speak. He said that for so long nobody wanted to come to Northern Ireland, because they felt it was too dangerous, so he would go to wherever he was invited, so that they wouldn’t have to feel as isolated as he had felt in the past. Even a minor stroke 3 years ago didn’t stop him. He and my mother-in-law were planning to go to Uganda next week for a trip to help with a charity programme looking after street children in Kampala. It would have been their third trip out, and demonstrates the kind of wonderfully giving man that he was. We’re all still trying to take in what happened. The police investigation into the accident is ongoing, and we won’t know exactly what happened for some time. I do appreciate your thoughts and prayers. Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/18 "2012-02-18T10:35:32Z")
He was clearly a very kind, giving, intelligent, compassionate man who felt he had much left to do. The world was a better place for having had him in it, and is undoubtedly diminished by his passing. I’m so sorry, **irishgirl**. ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/19 "2012-02-18T14:42:03Z")
I am so sorry. Please accept my condolences. Peace and strength to you and the family. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2012, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158/20 "2012-02-18T15:59:35Z")
Sorry for your loss, **irishgirl**. > [@irishgirl](#): > > He studied the effects of conflict on how people deal with problems, how conflict can become “normalised” and the barriers to reconciliation, using Northern Ireland as his field of study. He was a recognised authority in that field, and spoke at conflict resolution and reconciliation summits and conferences in places like Colombia, Israel, South Africa, Sri Lanka and the Balkans. That touches… so many lives. He looked at it from the macro angle, but in the micro angle, it’s behind many stories of personal abuse. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sad-day-irishfellas-father-has-died/613158.md?page=2)