# Safe sex slut **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2000, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977 "2000-04-14T05:02:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/1 "2000-04-14T05:02:00Z")
ok, I’m feeling proud of myself 🙂 Today I went on the chat rooms to meet a guy… so I did, and he asked me over to his house… so i went. He was really cute, he had incense and candles and a waterbed and everything… we really started to get hot and heavy… So he got on top of me and asked me to fuck him. I said, great, where’s your condoms? He flopped over beside me disgusted… it turns out he never uses a condom… and he told me that I didn’t know what I was missing. I replied (as I put on my underwear): "Honey, the other night this guy asked me over, we had the most fabulous & safe sex, he asked me to fuck him TWICE even though he had to work the next morning at 6 AM. “YOU don’t know what YOU’RE missing!” ---
**Author:** ![dpr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dpr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dpr)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/2 "2000-04-14T05:23:00Z")
_pats on the back_ Stand firm (pun not intended) and hold to your principles. It’s his loss (caused by his selfishness and short-range vision). ---
**Author:** ![Commander\_Fortune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Commander\_Fortune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commander_Fortune)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/3 "2000-04-14T05:27:00Z")
Good for you. You did the right thing. ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/4 "2000-04-14T11:08:00Z")
Is this the first time you ever met this guy face-to-face, or should I say rather body-to-body? I’d say that if it was, and all that happened to you was that he didn’t have a condom you came out pretty well. Dangerous little past time you have there. * * * \*\* _Sigh_. So many men, so few who can afford me \*\* _Original by Wally_ _I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it._ ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/5 "2000-04-14T14:42:00Z")
For some reason, **Matt** , I keep forgetting you’re queer… 🙂 Anywho, been there, didn’t do that. This whole new barebacking thing is scaring the shit out of me, and I’m glad you, like me, don’t tolerate it. I’ve also had guys ask me to ejaculate in their mouth, and I am very, very uncomfortable with that (and these are guys that are most assuredly post-AIDS). I know I’m negative (I test regularly), I know I’m always safe, but I just have it in my head that the only way to have sex is to have it safely - no other option has ever existed for me. Besides, if I didn’t wear a condom, I think I’d shoot in about 3 seconds. In fact, I’m thinking about going to _two_ condoms to help cut down on the sensitivity! And **ultress** , it’s not as dangerous as you’d think. I’ve been meeting people (read as: acquaintances, friends, good friends, one-nighters, boyfriends _and_ long-term relationships) over the internet for a long time, and never had a single bad experience. It is possible to get what one wants and be careful in the process. Oh, and I saw the thread title, and immediately thought of the song “Safe Sex Slut” from “Ten Percent Revue” by Tom Wilson Weinberg (a Philadelphia native). Ever heard it? Very amusing. Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/6 "2000-04-14T15:42:00Z")
How come you didn’t bring condoms Matt? Also, condoms aren’t going to protect a person completely from herpes, HPV & genital warts. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/7 "2000-04-14T15:48:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **handy** : > > How come you didn’t bring condoms Matt? Hey, very good point! A responsible top should know these things, **Matt**. I always come with my Bag o’ Tricks™, which includes lube, a variety of condoms, handiwipes, tissues, tea lights, a pack of matches, and 3 kinds of massage oil. 😉 {Whistles “Be Prepared” by Tom Lehrer} > [@](#): > > Also, condoms aren’t going to protect a person completely from herpes, HPV & genital warts. And crabs - nasty little fuckers. :mad: That’s why it’s more often referred to as “saf **er** ” sex these days, not “safe” sex - nothing is 100% safe, except abstinence. Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![psycat90](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/8 "2000-04-14T15:53:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Is this the first time you ever met this guy face-to-face, or should I say rather body-to-body? I’d say that if it was, and all that happened to you was that he didn’t have a condom you came out pretty well. Dangerous little past time you have there. Oh please, give me a break. Dangerous? Meeting new people is dangerous? How the hell do you ever make new friends if you don’t meet new people? Does it really matter where you meet them? Short of an insane asylum or prison, I’d say no. As a matter of fact, I plan on meeting about 15 or so people I have never met face to face tomorrow night. Should I be shaking in my boots? NO, I plan on having the time of my life. Sorry, had to get that off my chest. I’m very proud of you Matt. Your health and well-being are much more important than a roll in the hay. * * * Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive. ---
**Author:** ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/9 "2000-04-14T16:37:00Z")
Psy, maybe he meant, “Meeting strange people and hooking up as soon as you do isn’t entirely safe.” * * * I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/10 "2000-04-14T16:37:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Esprix: > \*\* That’s why it’s more often referred to as “saf **er** ” sex these days, not “safe” sex - nothing is 100% safe, except abstinence.\*\* Well, you could be a _Self_ Sex Slut. That’s 100% safe. 🙂 (My normal sig appears below, but you mustn’t assume anything.) * * * This is getting hard. Somebody relieve me. (A Wallian exclamation) ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/11 "2000-04-14T16:56:00Z")
> [@](#): > > How come you didn’t bring condoms Matt? I did (I do think of these things), and I mentioned so to him after he had his little crisis. He didn’t want to use them! BTW, I’m looking for apartments, too, and I always find it amusing how people don’t worry about going to a perfect stranger’s house to look at their apartment, but they do worry about doing the exact same thing to have sex with them. It’s odd. ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/12 "2000-04-14T20:36:00Z")
Woooo. Thanks Surgo. That’s exactly what I meant. Psycat90 of course I go places and meet new people, but the impression that I got from the OP was that Matt went in a chatroom, met a guy, went to the guy’s house for sex, and then it didn’t happen. No mention was made of whether Matt knew this person previously. Of course it’s a free country and he can meet who he wants when he wants. * * * \*\* _Sigh_. So many men, so few who can afford me \*\* _Original by Wally_ _I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it._ ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/13 "2000-04-14T20:55:00Z")
See, Matt, here’s where you made your mistake. You should choose your partners from among us closeted **married** men. We ALWAYS use condoms. 😃 _surreptitiously attempts to pass Matt my business card_ * * * Live a Lush Life Da Chef ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2000, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/14 "2000-04-15T03:18:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Matt went in a chatroom, met a guy, went to the guy’s house for sex, and then it didn’t happen. Yep, that’s what happened. Or didn’t. See you when I get back from DC. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2000, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/15 "2000-04-15T03:51:00Z")
> [@](#): > > You should choose your partners from among us closeted married men. We ALWAYS use condoms. Oh lord. BTDT. Never again. Y’all married into your beds, now lie in them and not with me. And you all don’t use condoms. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2000, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/safe-sex-slut/15977/16 "2000-04-15T16:12:00Z")
‘That’s why it’s more often referred to as “safer” sex these days, not “safe” sex - nothing is 100% safe, except abstinence.’ Not even that. That’s why paramedics where gloves.