# ..", said no one ever **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 31, 2012, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435 "2012-10-31T14:28:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![AaronX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7bcc69/32.png) [@AaronX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AaronX)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/1 "2012-10-31T14:28:02Z")
“Wow, that was a really successful ad campaign. I’m glad we decided to advertise our business by spam.” What other things have never been said? ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/2 "2012-10-31T14:56:42Z")
“I don’t like tacos” said no juan ever. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/3 "2012-10-31T14:58:16Z")
On FB last summer, "I can’t get enough of these 100 degree days . . . " ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/4 "2012-10-31T14:58:55Z")
Actually, I would argue that advertising by spam has been successful for a number of ventures. It is relatively cheap and even a 0.5% hit rate can generate profits substantially greater than the cost. If it didn’t work, it wouldn’t continue to be a medium of advertising for more than a decade. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/5 "2012-10-31T15:07:32Z")
“I’m really inspired by Romney’s ideas.” ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/6 "2012-10-31T15:26:15Z")
“I never find a reason to complain about Government.” ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/7 "2012-10-31T15:26:36Z")
Johnny Carson’s famous one of these was “Isn’t that the banjo player’s Porsche?” ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/8 "2012-10-31T15:46:52Z")
Going on a diet is fun! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/9 "2012-10-31T15:47:05Z")
“This traffic jam is so much fun - I wish I could have sat in it longer!” “I need a quiet, peaceful vacation. I think I’ll go to the Middle East.” ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/10 "2012-10-31T15:49:26Z")
“purple Xanadu streamers flap furiously across Walden’s Pond, bee-yotch!” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/11 "2012-10-31T15:53:13Z")
“Fred MacMurray’s in my microwave oven.” Actually my roommate said that, many years ago. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/12 "2012-10-31T16:03:17Z")
“Those are a nice pair of Crocs” “Being deployed to Iraq/Afghanistan was difficult, but the one thing that made it worth it were those yellow ribbon magnets.” ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/13 "2012-10-31T16:04:23Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > “purple Xanadu streamers flap furiously across Walden’s Pond, bee-yotch!” If anyone’s curious, I did a Google check on this after I posted it and there was nothing. Then I did it again now and this thread came up as the only hit. Those spiders crawl fast. ---
**Author:** ![Cryptic\_C62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Cryptic\_C62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cryptic_C62)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/14 "2012-10-31T16:14:30Z")
“When the lubricant reaches a steady boil, carefully place the dentures inside the orange peel using tongs or chopsticks.” ---
**Author:** ![leftfield6](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leftfield6/32/18780_2.png) [@leftfield6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leftfield6)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/15 "2012-10-31T16:41:31Z")
“Well, that was the most boring orgy I have ever been to” ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/16 "2012-10-31T16:57:50Z")
> [@August\_West](#): > > Johnny Carson’s famous one of these was “Isn’t that the banjo player’s Porsche?” I wonder what kind of car Steve Martin drives? ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/17 "2012-10-31T18:22:30Z")
“As soon as I shove this hot poker up my ass, I’m going to chop my dick off!” -George Carlin ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/18 "2012-10-31T18:41:00Z")
“Isn’t that the banjo player’s Porsche?” (An old music joke.) “I picked some cherry leaves with which to cook my apple pie on top of the freezer.” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/19 "2012-10-31T18:49:45Z")
And the Academy Award for Best Actor in a Motion Picture goes to… Pauly Shore! ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2012, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435/20 "2012-10-31T18:56:50Z")
Please give my 8-year-old a toy that makes lots and lots of noise! High-pitched repetitive beeping or song snippets a plus. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/639435.md?page=2)