# Said No One Ever **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 23, 2022, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006 "2022-02-23T14:15:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2023, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/181 "2023-11-18T02:15:31Z")
I wish my cat had more, sharper claws to sink into my bare thighs when he jumps on my lap while I’m sitting on the toilet. ---
**Author:** ![LilXMo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lilxmo/32/4225_2.png) [@LilXMo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilXMo)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2023, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/182 "2023-11-18T03:52:08Z")
I love when spaghetti sauce drips onto my white shirt. It’s great that I’ll never get it out ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2023, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/183 "2023-11-18T04:45:04Z")
The sexiest thing in the world is a stranger who has spaghetti sauce stains on their shirt. I immediately feel intense desire for them, regardless of age, gender, or any other characteristic they possess. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2023, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/184 "2023-11-20T14:12:55Z")
Why is it whenever I require a tool, the correct one is always conveniently available? ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/185 "2024-12-06T14:53:15Z")
“Being an executor is surprisingly simple.” ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/186 "2024-12-06T16:33:09Z")
Dang, I wish my dog would bark earlier and more often at all the animals that pass through our back yard every night. ---
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/187 "2024-12-06T18:00:26Z")
Oh, goodie, it’s snowing! I _ **LOVE** _ driving in a winter wonderland!! _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2024, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/188 "2024-12-07T03:09:41Z")
“Oh, boy! There’s a new edition of Windows.” ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2024, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/189 "2024-12-07T09:03:53Z")
I wish you guys would drop by more often—I really enjoy reading _The Watchtower_ and _Awake_. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2024, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/190 "2024-12-08T01:36:26Z")
You know how everybody loves the taste of Jaeger? Guess who just got the patent for a Jaeger flavoured toothpaste? Now you can wake up to America’s favourite frat bro beverage every day! I’ve also got Malört, screech rum and a delicious toothpaste that mixes all three! ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2024, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/191 "2024-12-09T21:52:52Z")
I love going to the dentist. ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2024, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/192 "2024-12-10T03:38:55Z")
If you want cheap bottled water, your best bet is at the airport. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2024, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/193 "2024-12-10T03:41:34Z")
I really look forward to preparing my tax returns every year. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2024, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/194 "2024-12-10T04:16:55Z")
I put on a few extra pounds lately, and I love it, because it is such a fun challenge to lose weight. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2024, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/195 "2024-12-10T04:17:22Z")
> [@Bicycle\_Bill](#): > > Oh, goodie, it’s snowing! I _ **LOVE** _ driving in a winter wonderland!! Puts up hand. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2024, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/196 "2024-12-11T03:48:53Z")
I had both a doctor and dentist appointment this week and neither one of them found a single thing that I should cut out, do more of, or get a treatment for. ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [December 11, 2024, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/197 "2024-12-11T21:07:23Z")
The guitar solo in that Gregorian Chant was really awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2024, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/198 "2024-12-14T16:01:22Z")
I love shopping for used cars because nothing screams _“honest intentions”_ like a used car dealership. I mean, who wouldn’t trust a bunch of total strangers in cheap suits to have your financial well-being at heart? And it’s just so comforting how they never suggest fancy extras that I absolutely don’t need. It’s basically a nonprofit organization at this point. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2024, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/199 "2024-12-16T18:15:36Z")
Whenever I feel the need to associate with good kind-hearted people, the sort that always have your best interests in mind, try to uplift your spirits when you’re feeling down, and are your biggest supporters and cheerleaders, there’s no need to look any further than the nearest gun shop. ---
**Author:** ![Ferris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ferris/32/11573_2.png) [@Ferris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferris)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2024, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/200 "2024-12-21T01:50:11Z")
The cyclone won’t affect tonight’s star-gazing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006.md?page=11)