# Said No One Ever **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 23, 2022, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006 "2022-02-23T14:15:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2022, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/81 "2022-04-24T04:17:54Z")
There is not enough canned laughter in sitcoms. It is always used appropriately. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2022, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/82 "2022-04-25T12:14:58Z")
Why do grocery store brands bother putting all those quality ingredients in their canned food? I’d be content with far worse at the price. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2022, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/83 "2022-04-26T21:50:11Z")
Sneezing always makes my kneecaps fall off. ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2022, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/84 "2022-04-27T21:16:33Z")
It wasn’t nearly this messy last time I exploded. ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2022, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/85 "2022-04-29T03:00:03Z")
I’m tired of having sexual dreams. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2022, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/86 "2022-04-29T16:43:45Z")
It was only the fortieth car I’ve eaten, and no one ever sent me to Gitmo for it. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2022, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/87 "2022-04-29T19:19:40Z")
_Turn the volume up on that Best of Bagpipes record!_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2022, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/88 "2022-04-30T22:20:40Z")
It’s okay, he’s alive, Jim. ---
**Author:** ![Dropo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Dropo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dropo)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2022, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/89 "2022-05-02T01:27:31Z")
If you don’t think all movies would be better with dinosaurs, then you support more poverty and oppression of Venusian-Americans. ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2022, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/90 "2022-05-02T05:56:04Z")
Hello. Oh! Can you get me on other telemarketers’ lists? I so enjoyed our moment. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2022, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/91 "2022-05-02T16:30:27Z")
Not only does that dress make you look fat, honey, here’s a ticket for an all-expense-paid one-way autogyro trip to Blawnox to show you just how pleased I am. ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2022, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/92 "2022-05-09T04:10:40Z")
I feel like dancing. Put on some John Cage. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2022, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/93 "2022-05-09T12:32:29Z")
Yeesh, they’re calling for temperatures in the 68 - 78F range the next couple weeks. No extremes? No blizzards? No 100+ drought days? This totally sucks. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2022, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/94 "2022-05-10T01:24:44Z")
Come quick! The cat is transmuting its poop into gold! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2022, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/95 "2022-05-10T23:46:31Z")
Don’t bring me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. ---
**Author:** ![Folly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folly/32/3219_2.png) [@Folly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folly)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2022, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/96 "2022-05-11T00:12:44Z")
Hey Look! ‘Bring me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breath free’ is now part of the official Republican party platform! ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2022, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/97 "2022-05-11T02:58:01Z")
They should make bras for cows!! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2022, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/98 "2022-05-11T03:58:08Z")
And the Academy Award for Best Actress goes to… Brad Pitt! ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2022, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/99 "2022-05-11T12:32:43Z")
_Honey, how about making another one of your delicious carrot and celery Jell-O molds for dessert!_ ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2022, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006/100 "2022-05-11T12:34:15Z")
What, the Queen herself is coming over for dinner tonight? Quick, break out the Jell-O molds and run to the store for some more canned chicken! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/said-no-one-ever/960006.md?page=6)