# Saladbar Artists. Hurry the fuck up already! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 13, 2009, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253 "2009-05-13T04:01:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/41 "2009-05-14T17:48:50Z")
I’d like to add to the pitting the person on line ahead of me at Subway today, who insisted on getting “everything” added to her footlong giganto chicken sub (“everything” means “every vegetable ever invented”), then asking for a little tub of oil separately, then after further reflection asking for red wine vinegar on her sub, then distracting the teenaged worker with her dimwitted theories about how young people look older these days, it must be the facial hair, what do _you_ think? (this last bit directed at me in an attempt to drag me into this inane conversation and delay things still further). Lady, I don’t give a rat’s ass, some of us have jobs and lives to get to, and you wouldn’t so closely resemble Petunia Pig if you didn’t consume such huge lunches. ---
**Author:** ![myskepticsight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@myskepticsight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/myskepticsight)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/42 "2009-05-14T18:32:32Z")
> [@cckerberos](#): > > I worked at a pizza place back in high school. Nothing made my night more than to pick up the phone during the dinner rush and hear the caller shout to their wife “Hey honey, I’ve got the pizza place on the line! What should we get?” I also worked at a pizza place in high school and had the same experience, many times. When that would happen and they’d tell me to hold on, I’d bang the phone receiver repeatedly against the counter. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/43 "2009-05-14T19:55:50Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Lady, I don’t give a rat’s ass, some of us have jobs and lives to get to, and you wouldn’t so closely resemble Petunia Pig if you didn’t consume such huge lunches. Really? She was taking a long time because of her talking, not because she wanted “everything”, most of which is negligible calories. And oil on the side means she can control how much oil she eats. It seems that this “pig” was actually making a more healthful choice. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/44 "2009-05-14T20:48:23Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Really? She was taking a long time because of her talking, not because she wanted “everything”, most of which is negligible calories. There are a _lot_ of different veggie bins at Subway, each of which take long enough to sample if the counterperson is not distracted by dopey customer comments. > [@](#): > > And oil on the side means she can control how much oil she eats. Or the ability to pour an entire tublet on the sandwich instead of the couple of squirts people usually get. > [@](#): > > It seems that this “pig” was actually making a more healthful choice. Or she could get a six-incher without mayonnaise, extra oil etc. Or just not make her sandwich creation be an all-day affair, her lard-butt being of secondary import. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/45 "2009-05-14T20:57:58Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Or the ability to pour an entire tublet on the sandwich instead of the couple of squirts people usually get. She was probably being prudent: attempting to swallow an entire footlong sub without the proper lubrication can damage even a well-stretched esophagus. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/46 "2009-05-14T21:19:33Z")
> [@stpauler](#): > > And then there are the folks who insist on filling up their soda to the brim. Even if that means waiting for the foam to settle down, add a little more, and repeat _ad nauseum._ Here’s a hint, tilt it to the side so it overflows a bit to give you more pop in less time. Oh, god, I ran into that today. Apparently the guy had to get _just the right amount_ of soda in his cup. He’d take a little sip, then fill up his cup. Oops, too full, take a little sip, oops, not full enough . . . Same thing about the people who stand in front of the coffee maker to concoct the perfect coffee. Add a little creamer, stir, taste, add a litte more creamer, stir, taste, add a little sugar, stir, taste . . . ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/47 "2009-05-14T22:49:03Z")
And then there are the salsa bar yahoos, one of whom I ran into today at El Pollo Loco. She had a sizable to-go order, which she stacked on the ledge of the salsa bar while she s-l-o-w-l-y filled several of those little plastic cups with assorted salsas. Getting the cup lids affixed just perfectly was another lengthy operation, while the bag of food prevented anyone else from accessing the other side of the bar. Then she left it there, together with her keys and other crap, while she filled a couple of big cups at the soda machine. Meanwhile, six or eight of us were lining up trying to get our salsa, too. She gaped at us unseeingly, in a bovine manner, but the glare of bigger meaner guys than me didn’t speed her up a bit. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2009, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253/48 "2009-05-15T00:42:49Z")
I admit that in my teens I was one of those who’d pile everything up _just so_, the reason being that I could then get more food for my money (you could only go up once). However, on the few occasions that there were other people there and I knew my scientic piling would take a while, I’d let them go first. Nothing wrong with taking a long time about getting the most you can as long as you’re considerate about it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/saladbar-artists-hurry-the-fuck-up-already/496253.md?page=2)