# Same-Sex Flirting on the SDMB
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [October 15, 2001, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592 "2001-10-15T23:12:51Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/1 "2001-10-15T23:12:51Z")
Does it make you uncomfortable when someone of the same gender flirts with you here on the boards? Does it make a difference if it’s “in fun” or if you think they actually find you attractive? Does it make a difference if you know they’re gay? Bisexual? Straight? Do you determine the gender of the person flirting with you before responding? Is once ok? Twice? Sometimes? All the time?
Esprix
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### Author:  [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/2 "2001-10-15T23:18:06Z")
Doesn’t bother me, flirt away. Maybe not in GQ. As long as the flirter is not offended if I choose not to flirt back. It’s a guy’s prerogative, you know.
😉
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### Author:  [@Yue\_Han](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yue_Han)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/3 "2001-10-15T23:23:49Z")
Wouldn’t bother me, I think. I don’t get flirted with so I don’t know (not an attempt to be flirted with) but my logic runs like this:
I do not particularly want to have gay sex. I could happily never handle a penis other than my own for the rest of my life. And yet, as a chubby, hairy young man, I find it reassuring that there is a subset of other men out there who might like to have sex with me based on that. It’s nice to know people want to have sex with you, even if you don’t want to have sex with them.
Flirting obviously doesn’t necessarily imply a desire to have sex, but it’s the same logic being applied.
On the other hand, I am not a giant fan of flirting in general, but homosexual flirting does not bother me any more or less than straight.
–John
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### Author:  [@blur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blur)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/4 "2001-10-15T23:24:54Z")
I don’t think I’ve been flirted with by the same sex, but even if I had been, it wouldn’t have bothered me.
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### Author:  [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/5 "2001-10-15T23:25:55Z")
Doesn’t bother me at all. I’ve been flirted with a few times by women, some of whom I later found were bi and thus possibly actually interested, but that didn’t really make any difference. I am straight, so if a woman were to seriously express an interest (that has not happened thus far), I would be flattered but not interested. I do try to determine the gender of the person if I don’t already know, just so I won’t offend them by using the wrong pronouns.
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### Author:  [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/6 "2001-10-15T23:25:59Z")
Speaking as a (as far as **I** know) totally heterosexual woman, hell no.
Althugh it’s not like I’ve had the opportunity here (well, except for maybe **andygirl** , a little) same-sex flirting is fun for me. A friend of mine (bi) and I once, for a practical joke, got our circle of friends to believe we were dating.
Maybe my opinion isn’t the same as everyone else’s 'cause I am high on the non-homophobic scale, although I’d say a majority of people here are, too. But truthfully, I’d be much more flattered if someone like **jarbaby** tried to flirt with me than some guy I don’t know. I mean, it’s a message board, it’s not like there’d be any actual… uh… touching anyway.
MHO.
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### Author:  [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/7 "2001-10-15T23:26:07Z")
Nobody ever flirts with me on the boards, but if someone did, and she happened to be female, I would not be upset. I wouldn’t be overwhelmed with joy, either, but that’s because I’m quite happy with MrWhatsit, not because I have any hangups about girl-on-girl flirting.
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### Author:  [@tapioca\_tundra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapioca_tundra)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/8 "2001-10-15T23:29:29Z")
```auto
```
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### Author:  [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/9 "2001-10-15T23:30:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Geobabe \*
> \*\*I am straight, so if a woman were to seriously express an interest (that has not happened thus far), I would be flattered but not interested. \*\*
Aww…bummer.
::marking Geobabe off the list::
😉
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### Author:  [@Nocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nocturne)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/10 "2001-10-15T23:33:36Z")
I appreciate flirting no matter who it comes from.
(Then again, I likes both genders, so’s what do I know?)
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### Author:  [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2001, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/11 "2001-10-15T23:59:07Z")
I don’t think I would have a problem with it. It is just a message board after all. And even if it happen IRL, I probably still wouldn’t have a problem with it so long as the guy bought me a drink 😉
However, I wouldn’t know for sure because no one flirts with me. I feel all left out ☹
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### Author:  [@Tattva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tattva)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/12 "2001-10-16T00:04:26Z")
Wouldn’t bother me. I consider myself heterosexual, but I’ve done the grind dance stuff with female friends. It’s all in fun.
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### Author:  [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soul_Brother_Number_Two)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/13 "2001-10-16T00:10:48Z")
im an attention slut, so it doesnt bother me at all. heck, ill even start it from time to time. hey, esprix, um, nice package!
i slay me.
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### Author:  [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/14 "2001-10-16T00:27:02Z")
I’m about 99.44% straight, and guys have never flirted with me, here or IRL. (Of course, I’m not _that_ much of a flirter on this board, even with the wimmin - too many women here that I don’t know _that_ well, and I’d hate for someone to actually take it seriously.)
I wouldn’t be offended by it, and on the MB I doubt I’d feel uncomfortable. I probably wouldn’t flirt back; I’m just not wired that way. But guy-on-guy flirting in threads I’m involved in doesn’t bother me in the least; I hope you feel as comfortable in flirting here as the heteros and the gay/bi women do. 🙂
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### Author:  [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/15 "2001-10-16T00:31:16Z")
My answer will have to be hypothetical, since I haven’t participated in any flirt threads. (I’m still kind of new and don’t know people well enough. (Although flirting might be a way to get to know people…) )
I’m straight and married. I wouldn’t mind if a gay man flirted with me - I’d be flattered. If they actually found me attractive, that would still be OK, as long as they understand that I’m married and monogamous. I actually think that the fact that I’m married would limit my flirting more than the fact that I’m straight. (BTW, the term “straight” bothers me a little because it’s so absolute. I like the concept of the Kinsey scale better.)
Anyway, I wouldn’t post anything here that I wouldn’t be comfortable showing my wife. So playful flirting is fine, virtual sex and/or forming romantic attachments is not.
I _would_ check the gender of someone flirting with me, and not just to use the correct pronouns.
Great thread, **Esprix**. How long do you think it’ll be before it turns into the bi-curious flirt thread? 😉
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### Author:  [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/16 "2001-10-16T02:31:40Z")
Doesn’t bother me at all. 😃
I’m not real good at giving it back, though. Not that I don’t _want_ to, I’m just kinda inept when it comes to flirting with women.
So ladies, if I flirt with you and come across sounding like a complete moron, just know that my heart is in the right place. 😃
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/17 "2001-10-16T02:57:05Z")
Doesn’t bother me a bit, sugarbuns. 🙂
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### Author:  [@StephenG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StephenG)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/18 "2001-10-16T04:00:46Z")
Speaking as one who is pretty hetereosexual, and who hardly ever gets flirted with, I wouldn’t mind a bit if a guy flirted with me. I’d probably respond in kind, although with less sincerity than if it were a woman. I’ve been known to jokingly flirt with my male friends, actually – the ones who are secure enough to accept it, anyway.
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### Author:  [@croaker67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/croaker67)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/19 "2001-10-16T04:05:18Z")
Unfortunately I haven’t been around long enough to know how to flirt. I enjoy the chit chat and mindless banter, but wouldn’t know a flirt if he/she set my PC on fire. 😃
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### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2001, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-flirting-on-the-sdmb/87592/20 "2001-10-16T04:17:49Z")
Since I have to ask to be flirted with by either sex, and, of course, think both sexes are A-OK, peachie keen (^\_\_~), if some guy flirted with me out of the blue here, I’d just enjoy the attention.
I was kinda hoping this was a Same Sex Flirting Thread, actually. 🙂
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