# Same-sex marriage in Canada: How-to site needed **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [January 27, 2007, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748 "2007-01-27T19:12:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/1 "2007-01-27T19:12:49Z")
I’m tired of waiting for the U.S., or even my state, to permit me to marry my partner. I haven’t found a very good website that actually goes through the process step by step for non-Canadian citizens. (There are a number of sites that give some details or link to some forms, but also seem to exist primarily as pitches for wedding coordination services, so they’re not really DIY instructions.) My partner and I have already had the big do with the family, emotionally-meaningful officiant, musicians, cake, etc. many years ago. We just want to do whatever is legally necessary to get married. Can anyone recommed a website, fact sheet, or simply a list of instructions that, if followed, will result in marriage? Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/2 "2007-01-27T19:46:18Z")
You’re in the Pacific Northwest, so here’s the guide to marriage in British Columbia: [http://www.vs.gov.bc.ca/marriage/howto.html](http://www.vs.gov.bc.ca/marriage/howto.html) You can also contact them for more information. Remember, that, while your marriage will be legal in British Columbia and in Canada as a whole, it will not, at the current time, be recognized under US federal law. Congratulations to you and your partner, and I hope you both will be happy together. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/3 "2007-01-27T19:50:37Z")
… ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/4 "2007-01-27T20:03:04Z")
What Captain amazing said. In general, call the town hall of where ever it is you want to get married. They will guide you through the process (which is very simple – no residency requirement, no blood test). ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/5 "2007-01-27T20:59:57Z")
You can also get it done in a few churches. The United Church of Canada permits same-sex marriages, but as I recall it is up to individual congregations whether any given UCC church will perform one. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/6 "2007-01-27T22:33:14Z")
There’s also the [Metropolitan Community Church](http://www.mccchurch.org), which is very gay friendly–IIRC the gay-marriage lawsuit/activism in Ontario that really brought things to the notice of the wider world was triggered by a publication-of-banns marriage in an MCC church in Toronto. Looking at their website, though… there does not seem to be one in Vancouver BC, although there is one in Seattle. Of course, that’s assuming you want a specifically Christian ceremony. As an alternative, there is, or was, an active Pagan community in the Victoria area. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2007, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/7 "2007-01-27T22:39:15Z")
[Canadians for Equal Marriage](http://www.equal-marriage.ca/) also has a bunch of interesting links, including [http://www.samesexmarriage.ca/](http://www.samesexmarriage.ca/) . ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/8 "2007-01-28T00:49:38Z")
Thanks so far! To reitterate, we just want the bare-minimum legal marriage, and we’d like help finding out how to do that. We’ve already done the family wedding part. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/9 "2007-01-28T03:21:00Z")
I have nothing to add but my congratulations. So, congratulations! ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/10 "2007-01-28T06:18:01Z")
[QUOTE=Shoshana] Thanks so far! To reitterate, we just want the bare-minimum legal marriage, and we’d like help finding out how to do that. We’ve already done the family wedding part. [/QUOTE] If you have a “legal” marriage in British Columbia but then move back to the States, you aren’t legally married in the eyes of the State of Washington (or Oregon, or whereever you’re from.) If you plan to continue residing in a place where your marriage has no legal standing, having a “legal” wedding doesn’t mean anything. I have to ask why you want this. You had the wedding that mattered. What conceivable benefit could this plan give you? For most purposes, “married” implies a state, not a one-time event; to really simplify matters, you are, in effect, married if both parties agree you are and the state agrees too. That’s why common law marriages exist; sufficiently lengthy cohabitation is construed as admission that you’re married even if no ceremony took place. In other words, if you’re just going back to your U.S. residence, having a “legal” wedding in Canada is a waste of your time and money, because it doesn’t exist where you live. However,\*\* if you’d like to stay in Canada\*\*, I for one welcome you with open arms. We could definitely use some more folks. ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/11 "2007-01-28T06:40:36Z")
Do take into account the fact that it may be EXTREMELY difficult to get divorced, if the state you live in doesn’t think you’re married at all and the place you got married has residency requirements for divorce. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/12 "2007-01-28T06:51:21Z")
> [@](#): > > If you have a “legal” marriage in British Columbia but then move back to the States, you aren’t legally married in the eyes of the State of Washington (or Oregon, or whereever you’re from.) Yes, we are know this. Otherwise, we’d do it in the U.S. > [@](#): > > If you plan to continue residing in a place where your marriage has no legal standing, having a “legal” wedding doesn’t mean anything. It might not mean something to you. It means something to us. If you’re saying that it has no legal standing, that’s a different issue from what it means. The state is not the arbiter of what is meaningful to us. Further, though it has no legal standing, marriages (and civil unions) from other juresdictions have been used successfully to get newspapers to include partner information in obituaries here, and to get hospitals to acknowledge the relationship, and as further evidence of domestic partnership status. > [@](#): > > I have to ask why you want this. You had the wedding that mattered. What conceivable benefit could this plan give you? Without getting nitpicky about it, why does anyone want a wedding brokered by any state? Yes, there may be economic or legal benefits. However, I we are interested in having a state legitimate our union. That it’s not \*our \*state is unfortunate. > [@](#): > > In other words, if you’re just going back to your U.S. residence, having a “legal” wedding in Canada is a waste of your time and money, because it doesn’t exist where you live. However, if you’d like to stay in Canada, I for one welcome you with open arms. We could definitely use some more folks. Perhaps it’s a waste of time and money. So is a $40,000 wedding, which we didn’t do and aren’t interested in. That my state does not recognize my marriage should be an indictment of my state. We appreciate the invitation, though! > [@](#): > > Do take into account the fact that it may be EXTREMELY difficult to get divorced, if the state you live in doesn’t think you’re married at all and the place you got married has residency requirements for divorce. If the U.S. never recognizes our marriage, then there won’t be any need to get divorced unless one of us wants to marry another person in Canada. If the U.S. does, there will be provisions for divorce that don’t require residency. If the U.S. continues on its present course, a year in Canada doesn’t sound like a bad idea. We might move there even if we’re planning to stay married. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/13 "2007-01-28T15:05:30Z")
Link to B.C. Vital Stats: [How to get married in British Columbia](http://www.vs.gov.bc.ca/marriage/howto.html). You’ll notice that nowhere on this page does it refer to same-sex marriages as opposed to opposite-sex marriages. Since they’re equal under the law, there’s no need to distinguish between them. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/14 "2007-01-28T19:22:00Z")
[QUOTE=Northern Piper] Link to B.C. Vital Stats: [How to get married in British Columbia](http://www.vs.gov.bc.ca/marriage/howto.html). You’ll notice that nowhere on this page does it refer to same-sex marriages as opposed to opposite-sex marriages. Since they’re equal under the law, there’s no need to distinguish between them. [/QUOTE] Thanks, that’s very helpful. The maximum life of the license is given; do you (does anyone) know if there’s a minuimum? I.e., is it feasible to submit the form and pay for the license on Monday morning and (with a prearranged appointment) have the mariage performed later that day? There doesn’t appear to be a waiting period per se but I can’t tell if the license is generated upon payment. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/same-sex-marriage-in-canada-how-to-site-needed/389748/15 "2007-01-28T23:12:06Z")
Best to call the Vital Stats office and ask - they have contact info on that web-page.